22 Oct 2015

House rules for maid to abide

Content page - All topics
Special Needs.2
Cost to Employ a FDW
Who earns lesser than FDWs?
What maids did? Part 5
My 4th filipino FDW (JA)

22 Oct 2015
Attention blinded righteous Activists 自以为是的善心人:  
Do not post in my blog!
Maids have the choice not to be a a low class maid or 'unfairly treated' human being. You and FDWs chose the job, not employer conned you to take up an overseas job.  There are no slaves (property of owners) in Spore. You and FDWs are smart, certainly not stupid and unable to compare what is best for you, eg try your ways to find your dream job, step on FDWs' Employers, stab others, etc. 

Some FDWs are good at attacking or accusing their employers, do they "qualify as vulnerable maid or not treated like human being"?  A FDW who viewed herself as not treated like a human cannot voice out, cook up sad stories or know how to use mobile phones, Facebook, Whatapp, etc!  Aren't you people a bunch of hypocrite cum spoiled brats? 

You want a job in Spore, agree to that company's policies... same applies for the house of FDW's employer. All employee are hired based on Ministry of Manpower's terms and conditions, I don't believe modern FDWs, with off days and mobile phones are out of touch with this urban world.  FDWs are not vulnerable babies but the Spore law and activists think otherwise.  Who gave you and indolent FDWs the rights to demand and expect rosy life in Spore?  PAP promised you that? 

In the eyes of Activists, Maids = comfortable lives at the expense of employers, no need to work hard for it? Stop thinking maids are not treated as human beings.  You like to point finger, go to MOM or agency that recruited you.  If you live blaming Employers for your misery or plight, are you being fair?  You're simply cantankerous, cynical, selfish and/or mentally sick. You have intentionally forgotten it was FDWs' choice, Employers didn't force any woman to fly over and work as maid.  Can't behave properly and accept the employment terms (Employers' house rules), stay in source country!  Don't behave like spoiled brats, overvalued or machiavellian不擇手段 maids!  

Employers do not owe FDWs a living!  If you have a better catch, by all means don't agree to our house rules.  Where can you find a job that pays you a decent salary and employer fully responsible for your live-in living expenses amounting to about S$1500 per month, as well as your irresponsible mentality? Stop whining about your unfortunate plight or being forced to accept an inhuman job.  FDWs are fully protected by MOM, have freedom to choose employer and your service is not free so stop thinking you are a slave.  Maids, you want to come to Spore, you stepped into your country's maid agency so BLAME yourself!  Accept the consequences of your actions like an adult, not spoiled brat!

Is it necessary to have house rules?  Yes
Did MOM/activist pay you to maintain your house?  If something happens to your house, child or beloved ones because you were unclear, lax eg no house rules for FDW to follow, who bears the consequences?  You, the employer!

House rules are set to avoid misunderstanding and reduce possibility of maid to say "I don't know", doing something not right or turning your house upside down.  Remember, it is your house, not maid's, activist or MOM's.  Maid is a paid to live-in stranger who shares your territory and 'invades your privacy'.  Maid wants you to treat her like a family member but she herself, most likely only regards you as an ATM machine.

A demanding or unrealistic maid is certainly unsuited to work as FDW.  She comes to enjoy life, hook onto her mobile phone and do as little work as possible ...obviously no intention to help you with the title Foreign Domestic Worker.  House rule is one of the ways to screen a transfer maid (not 100% accuracy).  Another interview question to ask is CCTV in your house.  

If you need your FDW to stay in your parents or in-law house with your children, do ensure FDW and agent are aware.  It is important to make this as house rule/job requirement.  State (print and sign) clearly that FDW is not working in 2 houses and she is given at least 8 hours rest daily (not overworked or abused). Don't assume maid agrees that while in somebody's house, she has to assist the kids, wash their dishes, clothes, prepare the food, etc because these 'chores' do not take place in their employers' house.  Some FDWs thought all these child related chores are handled by the parents/somebody else and they don't need to help out with the preparation/cooking for the kids, as well as her food share.  Recently, a distressed mummy had a maid who ran to HOME and the sickening HOME personnel 'blackmailed' her.  HOME told employer if she refused to absorb maid loan and send that maid home .... using the reason maid was forced to work in 2 houses, HOME threatened to complain to MOM.  This was posted in MOM website: "You can deploy your FDW to work at another address only if she is there to look after your young children or elderly parents."  House rule is necessary to avoid unnecessary ordeal or monetary losses.

I had an ex-Indonesian maid M whom I have sent to my sister's house for babysitting.  I trained and tried M for weeks but found I can't trust this young girl (bio showed 22 but actual was 18) alone with my girl nor believe she was capable of taking care of my precious girl without using 'brutal force' (click).  

I told M to take mrt to my sister's house after school everyday .... for a few hours till time for me to meet her at home.  M refused to do any chores related to my girl, eg washing her bowls.  M said her agent told her she cannot work in two houses ... ridiculous, pure laziness.  M also went missing (20-45 mins) and failed to reach my sister's house on time.  At that time, mrt service had no major breakdown so the train travelling time was quite accurate. M simply hated going to my sister's house because my sister didn't treat her like a guest.  My sis tolerated then got frustrated and told that lazy M that if she didn't want to lift a finger, she had to cook her own food and do her relevant washing.  Going to my sister's house wasn't stated in the house rule, was something I figured out to keep M because I didn't want to terminate her and waste the high recruitment fee as well as training days spent on her. The problems M gave me, her rebellious attitude and poor conduct, as well as the frequent heart twitching cries from my girl made me terminated M.  Should have terminated M without giving her so many chances to improve/repent on her mistakes.  Some FDWs are simply so unyielding (too prideful) or willing to change because they felt they are not in the wrong. 

FDW can lie to get a job (eg JA, my current FDW on Rule #2) but by being honest and clear about FDW's work scope, in the presence of agent, employer can reduce the chance of getting a lousy maid.  Rope the agent in if maid lies, complain to MOM if both are in cahoots.  I like email communication with agency to avoid FDW and agent's memory failure.

My main house rules were listed to my prospective maids/agents.  House rules worked most of the time when I had my first and third Filipino maid (at that time, no mandatory off days).  Initially, I thought it was Filipino's better command of English but after I've employed M (Indonesian) and JA (Filipino), I woke up. It is a person's working mentality,willingness to learn and her acceptance to be my abled helper. 

House rules are created to avoid FDW heading the wrong way.  By the time you want to pull the maid back on track, it will be hard and she will most likely hate you for 'suddenly being so strict/unreasonable'.   
Don't assume FDW knows your boundaries.  
Don't assume FDW knows her obligations as FDW/maid.
Don't assume FDW knows her work permit conditions are different from EP holders or normal employee like us, eg termination of contract once FDW is pregnant = repatriation.

Activists say you should trust the maid. You can also claim if employer cannot trust a live-in helper then don't employ FDW. Well, when trust is not earned by FDW, who suffer in the end if something happens?  FDW doesn't suffer, even if she is at fault or involved in crimes, her sentence will either be overlooked or being lightened.

My FDWs, although my house rules and requirements were printed in black and white, signed by my FDW on Day One but she can still play 'I don't know game'. Cunning FDWs knew the scope of work yet tried to make Employers change for their sakes. There is no penalty levied on irresponsible or cheater FDW who walk out/terminate her contract. 

Maids, you treat employer nicely, be good to her and family, you'll get similar treatment .... my theory. You earn my respect, trust and your rewards. Nothing is free in this world. You cannot deliver, unable to perform, don't expect others to treat you well and shower you with benefits. I can try to tolerate your bad behaviour for the sake of my special needs child but not eternally.

House rule 1 - A willing heart to work as FDW
¤ Your main role is to look after a girl with special needs.  Take good care of her, bring her to school, play with her, keep her safe and tolerate her unintentional bad behaviour.  You are encouraged to correct or teach my child the right way with the help of teacher and therapist. 

¤ Don't act forgetful when your employer has reminded you, demonstrated the chore/cooking, given you pen and note book to write down instructions, as well as browse through training notes.

¤ Work ethic - You have been interviewed, seen my child in person, agreed to work and look after a girl with special needs. Nobody forced you to work for me. You have been given time to compare other employments with my expectations/job requirements. You knew your duties (job description printed on paper), nothing hidden so you should behave like a sensible adult and deliver your promises, show that you are a person who needed a job for your family.

¤ Show high cooperation, honest, helpful, patient and a responsible helper. You applied to be FDW not a playgirl or be my daughter (act childish).

¤ Do not take afternoon naps.  In the evening, if you have spent too much time on your mobile phone, it is your problem for not restricting and allowing yourself enough rest.

¤ Report to Madam/Sir if there is any unusual child behaviour or sick symptoms. 

House rule 2 - FDW's mobile Phone
¤ FDW shouldn't use personal mobile phone during working hours to avoid distraction and addiction to her phone. 

JA gets to use her personal phone everyday, from about 7pm and keeps her phone full day, on every off days. My FDW is given a phone to stay connected with me and hubby.  When JA newly joined, I gave her another phone which could download music.  She asked hubby for ear phones behind my back.  Told hubby not to give her because I do not want her ears to be stuffed and put my child or her life in danger, especially when they are outside.  When JA is alone on her off days, I don't care how she wants to get her ears blocked.  Not that I am not concern about her safety but that's her off day, I don't want to know how she spent it.  Don't know means I won't be frightened.

FDWs seemed to refuse understand that there are Employers who cannot afford to let FDWs be engaged with personal phone 24/7 eg JA to neglect my girl with special needs. This has been one of my main requirements during my visits to the maid agencies, JA was reminded before contract renewal but apparently, JA is suffering from short memory the longer she works for me.  

¤ FDW must pay for own phone costs.  Cannot use the home phone or tell anyone employers' telephone numbers.  Wasting money to make frequent phone calls are your personal choice.  

My in law hired an Indonesian maid in July 2015.  We agreed unlimited mobile phone usage will ruin our lives and relationship with the live-in maid.  I thought getting a maid, especially ex-Sin might demand full usage of her mobile phone.  The maid that I shortlisted with another 4 really surpassed the rest during home interview.  She is perfectly alright not to have her mobile 24/7 and weekly off days. 

House rule 3 - Money and Valuables
¤ All money, phone and valuables have to be declared on first day of work and on each off days to avoid misunderstandings.  If money or valuables are missing, by having a declaration, employers know how much money or valuables FDW is holding on hand.  FDW can send money or things home but must pay own remittance, transport fees, etc.  

¤ Strictly no advance salary allowed. FDW is old enough to know how to save money for yourself and family.  FDW has to learn how to spend her money wisely, including glued to her mobile phone, take yearly home leave or buy unnecessary stuff.  

JA was asked to write a declaration before she went for home leave that her money is hers, JA decides how to use her money and she cannot act childish/poor memory by telling me she has no money.  As expected, the recent drama (June 2015) JA put up was after returning from home leave, claiming I didn't show enough concern or understand her money problem.  She even went overboard by saying 'all maids are poor' and wanted to terminate her 2nd contract. She decided to stay, maybe JA realised I wasn't going to give in to her nonsense... reached my tolerance level or she cannot find an employer better than me. 

House rule 4 - Cleanliness and Hygiene
¤ Long hair must be tied up.  Fingernails must be kept short and clean because you are touching our food and taking care of my child.  Your employer (me) is a good example, short nails and hair.  

I have house rules that are achievable and reasonable.  I am not a clean freak, all are very basic standards based on modern living.

¤ Food or pacifier that dropped on the floor, do not pick and give my girl without washing.

¤ Keep my house pest-free. 

¤ Separate cook and raw food.  Do not mix bowls, knives and chopping boards.  I don't want food contamination. 

¤ Cover mouth with tissue or mask when coughing or sneezing/flu. Wash your hands thoroughly if used to cover mouth or when it is dirty.  

This is what happens when M, my Indonesian maid didn't clean my girl well.  Made me heartache.  M claimed doesn't know why my girl has rashes and bruises.  She claimed 'no see', eyes on the floor or just looked blankly at me.  She was an unhygienic person and lazy to look into details.

House rule 5 - Safety and Observant
¤ FDW must be observant, watch my girl and ensure she doesn't walk alone (hold and keep her near you) or get hurt. After cooking, make sure the stoves are completely switched off. Before you leave the house, check the stove knobs, windows, electrical and ensure doors are locked by you.

JA is not an observant person or simply can't be bothered.  Almost everyday (2 years with me), she cannot smell urine or poo.  There were many times my girl's bolster or pyjamas was wet by urine but JA continued to let my girl use it.  Reminded JA not to let my girl wear short tee during the night because when she's asleep the tee would roll up, exposing her tummy and causing her to feel cold throughout the night.  2 years!  I have endured JA for more than 2 years.  To me, this spelt that JA has no heart to work well.  Countless reminders were given!  I'm keeping JA because I am worried the next FDW is worst then her.... more and more horror stories, as well as news reported on bad/evil maids ... MOM is not doing nothing to protect Employer and family's interest.

¤ Always keep the floor clean and dry. If there are any toys on the floor, spillage or dangerous things lying around such as marbles or scissors, clear and don't let my girl see or slip.   Always keep the kitchen gate locked.

If my girl knows what is right, what is wrong, what is dangerous, I don't need to hire a FDW (a problematic 'child') to help me take good care of of my child and protect her during my absence.  A case of negligent/carelessness - can you afford? Who suffered the most? Click - girl scalded 

House rule 6 - Food
¤ FDW must eat 3 main meals everyday.  My helper can sit down and eat the same food with employers during meal time. Employers do not provide food for fussy helper with special diet or particular food preference. Any food or things not included in the 3 main meals, permission must be granted before eating.  Taking things or food without permission is stealing.

Lunch allowance is given to my FDW.  FDW is free to choose any food for herself and my child within the daily food budget.

I am contemplating whether I should include a new clause that JA shouldn't use too much oil.  JA wants to put on weight but I don't.  She kept telling me she need to put on another 5 kg.... at my expense?  The food she cooks are so oily.  Have you ever used your fingers to pick up home cooked vegetables that are oily?  Have you eaten outdoor 菜饭bean sprouts that are oily?  It is so oily that I need to use soap to wash off!

House rule 7Security and Privacy
A case to share about having the house door locked, by an expat
Donna was a first class live-in Filipino maid. She worked for two months and she was really a very good cook. However, she walked out after an incident. I had refused to give her a key to my apartment so that she could not sneak out when I was out. 

She had supposedly ordered rempah from our grocer and when the delivery man called, she went downstairs to collect her order, leaving the door to my apartment unlocked. My 8-year old daughter was taking her shower, getting ready for school. When came out of the bathroom, she saw that the front door was ajar.

I would not have found out that she had sneaked out if my daughter had left for school. What if she should in future sneak out only after my daughter had gone and there was no one to blow the whistle on her? I have heard so many horror stories about maids who would not change their ways because their employers were too kind or too soft.

Ask yourself, with this kind of maid, do you want to entrust your daughter and the security of your home for 2 years? My ex-Indonesian FDW closed my main door but didn't lock it. She thought it was fine. I caught this in action and told her it was unsafe to leave the main doors unlocked in Spore. Once you've turned your back, nobody near the door, some stranger or thieves could have creeped in. My unit is of high human traffic, not hidden in a corner. Singapore hasn't reach a stage for citizens to leave their doors unlocked.

¤ FDW should not open doors to talk nor invite strangers home when employers are not home. FDW should not answer the door or employers' phone.  No matter whom they claim they are, be it policemen, NEA, etc. 

¤ Don’t tell other people, eg the neighbour, your friends, anything about us eg what time we get home, etc.  Don't upload information or pictures of us in your Facebook, etc.  Please respect our privacy. 

House rule 8 - Behaviour
¤ Do not beat, ill-treat and/or scream at Employers’ kid. Do not vent your anger, frustration or hatred on my girl.  Caught ill-treat my girl or work for other people, be a prostitute (sleep with men), you have to bear the consequences. 

¤ Excellent helpers aren’t born – they are trained so good work behaviour is to learn to accept our culture, lives and carry out instructions according to how I have trained you.

¤ Do not use any nail polish, wear make-up/perfume, smoke, drink alcohol in our presence.  Do not wear low-cut or revealing clothes during working days.

House rule 9 - Off day

¤ Off days can only be taken after completion of your loan. You may hold and use your mobile on all off days.  You can leave the house at 7.30 am but must be back before 8 pm. On your off day, employers will not ask you to do any tasks.  Employers are not responsible for your meals or personal expenses during your off days.  

The first time JA came home 15 mins late, no greeting, no apology, no phone call/sms to inform me, appeared like no big deal. I told her to be punctual.  One minute late is still considered late.  Orchard is her familiar place so there's no reason for an experience FDW to lose track of travelling time.  It is about self discipline and show your employer basic respect.

¤ Off days were requested by FDW so if you don't have money to sustain your rest days, you'll have to self reflect and watch your pocket tightly.  Employer has no obligation to give you cash advance.  My duty is to pay your monthly salary on-time.  

I can talk things out but I'm not the kind of employer who will ask FDW everyday "How are you?", "What did you do on your off day" or "Is everything going well today?".  I don't think my FDW need an extra friend to chit chat.  Maids with off day and Facebook are not lack of friends. FDW may say I didn't try to understand her, foster a close family relationship ....its an employment relationship, I prefer this way so that I won't get hurt too hard by FDW. 

¤ If FDW is unwell, you may use your off day to offset to get a good rest.  FDWs are not entitled to paid medical leave.  Under Singapore law, domestic workers are excluded from the Employment Act because they work in a private households.

This rule is necessary because it is easy for lazy FDWs to fake illness eg stomachache or giddy ... all these are quite hard to prove, unlike flu, cough, fever or food poisoning which are obvious.   If FDW is really unwell and needed a rest, getting her to utilise her off day will make her think twice.  Can she still work or just pretending to be very ill ... taking advantage of employers?  Allowing a sick FDW to rest is morally correct but FDW shouldn't misuse our compassion.   Don't forget most employers are not stay home tai-tai, we are merely salaried employee cum FDW's employer... we need to work.  

My sis ex-Filipino was a real princess cum schemer (fresh maid).  She had headaches quite frequently.  Once she declared she was unwell, she hid in her room and didn't want to do anything.  She became a runaway maid after working for two months only.  She ran to HOME with an ill-treated sad story.  After repeated attempts to match her with new employer, HOME finally saw her true colours.... just want to go home, not ill-treated.  Maid was picky on food and chose not to eat meals that didn't fit her requirements... she can't cook, my sis cooked, can't do housework well nor take care of the kids, having that princess FDW marked the end of my sister's thought to employ a replacement.

House rule 10 - Toilet Time 

¤ FDW must shower one to two times a day.  FDW can only use the common toilet in the kitchen. You cannot use the master bedroom toilet, except bathing my girl.  Before you enter employers' room, ask first.  Limit your shower or toilet time to 10mins.

Don't give maid any chance to hide in the toilet using her mobile phone heavily.

House rule 11  - CCTV

¤ We have CCTV to protect you, employers and my girl.  A decent and sensible helper who has nothing bad/sneaky to hide should not be bothered or affected by our CCTVs, located in obvious spots. No hidden cameras.

House rule 12 - Utilities

¤ Do not switch on air-con, computer, television without permission.  Switch off appliance (fan, kettle, heater, etc) or lights when not in use.  Do not waste water and electricity.   

JA has been using almost a full day to charge her power bank.  Mobile phone doesn't need such a long time to get fully charged so why JA's power bank need such a long time to be fully charged?  After taking a long time to charge, JA drained her mobile battery and power bank in one off day.... unbelievable!  Wasting my electricity.  Maybe I should restrict her power bank charging.

House rule 13 - Laundry

¤ FDW cannot use the washing machine.  FDW must hand wash own clothes and undergarments. Squeeze dry and hang outside to air dry.  FDW may spin dry your bedsheet and thick blanket.  When washing your clothes and bedsheets, use the 2 pails allocated to you. Do not mix with our clothes or pails with yours.  

House rule 14 - Respect Employers
¤ Do not try your ways or use former working methods in this Employment. Each employer and house has its own ways to take care of children and do housework. Listen well and carry out instructions according to the way Madam wants. 

¤ If you need to seek permission or discuss anything, your first point of contact is Madam, not Sir.

¤ Employing a live-in FDW doesn't mean employers have to change our lifestyle to suit you - a stranger, a worker not a VIP or new mistress of the house. You are an employee and shouldn't force your employers to do things like you are the most important person of the house.  You chose to join my household so you have to learn to adapt to our culture and lifestyle.

¤ Respect is earned by you.  Rewards are earned and based on your performance.  Entitlement is what MOM made employers 'bestowed.  You might have done a shabby job but your title as FDW gave you the luxury and FDW's employment package that your home country cannot match.


  1. I too had bad experiences with my maids. My maid, a mother of 3 children arrived 3 days b4 CNY and I called her a few times to interview her. After picked up at agency and reached home, I introduced her to my family, let her settle down and ask her to call home using my own calling card for her to relay to her family that she is safe & sound. I brought her to her room, showed her the drawers where she could put her clothes. I gave her brand new tops and laid down my rules to her. No short shorts and see thru clothes cos we have men at home and that she has to wear bra at all times and she replied "oh, yes, maam, yes, maam. I always do so. I always wear it.

    Day 2, back to my own house in the evening as I stayed with my mum who looks after my children. Busy settling down at 1130 pm. Bought sufficient bread over, told her that this whole loaf would last her over the 3 mornings and to help yourself to 2 packets of coffee or tea a day (showed her what 2 means). Went to the kitchen to wash the children's bottle, found the maid bathing. But smelt "food", so I went hunting. As the maid's room is connected to the kitchen, I walked in and found that maid had helped herself to my milo and left it in the middle of the room. So waited her to finish her shower. To my astonishment, the drink was gone! I was staring so hard at that particular spot. Maybe she felt guilty, saw my expression, she took out the cup of milo that she had cleverly hid in a corner, out of my sight. She apologized for making the drink w/o my permission as she was hungry and thought that I was sleeping.

    Day 3 night, 9pm, asked her to wash the children's milk bottles. She came out of her room wearing a white top and adjusting her bra. Told her not nice to do so and reinforced that she has to wear her bra at all times. As b4, she replied, yes maam and told me that she has just put it on. Quite ridiculous that she puts on her clothes but forgets her bra. If this is her habit then it is not acceptable in my house.

    Day 4 CNY celebration. After the celebration which was closed to midnight, my maid requested for her mobile phone and once again apologized to me as she had kept it from me that her cousin had given her a "sim card" for calling back to her hometown but she wanted it only to text her husband and children. I told her not every time I have to accede her request. I told her since she misses her family so much, she can do so the next day coz alright very late.

  2. Day 5, we went back to my mum's home at 10 am. I left and back at 3pm, she came out quickly and apologized to me so I ask her when she had done. She said that she broke the window grills lock! How could it be that the lock's handle be so fragile that it can be so easily broken. Tried to close the window was her answer. And in actual fact, 2 grill lock handles were broken.

    Requested her mobile phone from me. Asking me whether she could text her children. Instead, texted and called her cousin who is working in Singapore (which my sis overheard her talking) I wasn't able to hear as I was preparing my children for bed. I think my maid treats me like an idiot. I told her that she is not being honest at all. Telling and doing different things means being dishonest.

    I wanted to ask her something but caught her not wearing bra again! I raised my voice at her and again she apologized and kept telling me that she needed a job. Who doesn't? I do too or else what will happen to my children? Who will feed us?

    Only 5 days and this maid is dishonest and not wearing bra. Where is the limit? Employers who changed too many maids will be blacklisted. But how does MOM weigh who's fault is it? What if she steals my things or do something worse, what should I do? Would MOM be on our side or theirs? My house rules and instructions must be carried out if she wants a job. MOM should assist in screening their thoughts and willingness to work.

    I took a replacement maid, keeping her with no off days, told her keep bedroom door open at all times and I kept her mobile. I don’t want to be mean but they asked for it. Maid must prove her worthiness before she gets better terms from me.

    Who doesn't want to be treated well by others? All of us do, don't we? But maids certainly don’t deserve to be treated too nice from day 1. I can safely say that I took care of my ex-maids’ but they take things for granted and didnn’t prove worthy. All I want is a good maid, can MOM do something to help?

    1. Above comment was deleted due to poster made up excuse to say by working hard as FDW, she or her friend is a slave. There’s no slave in Spore. Slaves have no such prerogative. Slaves are owned, the same as you own your car, tv, sofa, etc. Owners are free to do whatever they fancy to their belongings. You can treat your owned-slaves like machines, work long hours, no rest, not given off day, no mobile phones, no regular meals, no proper sleeping area and CAN whip, kick or beat slaves to work faster as well as do more work. No repercussions at all if slaves exist in Spore. No need to worry about source country, MOM or activists running after the slave-owners. Differences of a FDW and Slave:

      1. FDWs can choose whether or not to become a maid (FDW). The entitlement of FDWs were made and listed in the standard agency contracts. Many FDWs chose to leave their families with a great deal of thought about the best realistic options available. Nobody can force another human to be slave or FDW.
      >> Slaves had no choice, no say, UNPAID and no human rights. They were kidnapped or sold and forced into slavery.

      2. FDWs stepped into their home country agencies willingly and chose to believe beautiful pictures of working aboard. Nobody tied their hands and dragged them into the agency or board the planes. Nobody can force FDW to pay placement fee if she adamantly refused to work overseas as maid. FDW owns her own body and mind. She made her own decision and handed over her passport to her local recruiter for overseas placement.
      >> Slaves were sold or kidnapped. Not given any option. No human rights.

      3. FDW are not chained. They can doll up and make themselves lovely or sexy to attract people’s attention, especially men.
      >> In TV, slaves are chained, wear shabby clothes and looked dirty.

    2. 4. FDWs can choose employers as much as their employers can choose them. They are interviewed and given time to think over the job offer.
      >> Slaves have no such choice, they were bought and sold like commodities. All the earnings/benefits ended up in somebody else pocket.

      5. FDWs are guaranteed a minimum wage as per embassies and agencies’ marketing tactic, paid a wage in Spore. FDWs are provided with medical insurance, 3 normal meals, reasonable accommodation, weekly rest days, home leave upon completion of 2-year contract, etc.
      >> Slaves are not guaranteed a minimum wage nor given lovely welfare and employment terms.

      6. If Sg employer is abusing the FDW, FDW can report to MOM and get her employer severely punished. Those not really abused or ill-treated, can choose to shed some crocodile tears to get their employers into trouble.
      >> Slaves do not enjoy such benefits or entitled to SOS. Slaves are owned and have no rights to demand anything.

      7. FDWs can use mobile phones to chit-chat, Facebook and so on. FDWs get at least 8 hours rest as per MOM’s guidelines.
      >> Slaves are denied such benefits.

      Maids are simply too lucky and fortunate as a human being. Don't use your good luck to belittle employers and resort to all sorts of lousy excuses/tricks in order to enjoy life better than your pathethic employers. If anyone who is still dulling the senses by believing we, Spore employers are not the best option for FDWs, who may be abusive, exploiting maids, slave-drivers, underpaid the FDWs but undeniable, we are the best choice for FDWs to live a dignified life, enjoy weekly off days, good salary (at least 100 to 200% higher than their own countries), provided live-in benefits, etc…. If you cannot get your brains working, go back home at your own costs and do a real comparison of what you had been given as FDW, regardless of your bad attitude and low education. Stay in your comfort zone if Home is really a haven, share weal and woe with your family and don’t regret. If you regret, by coming back to Spore or any other countries, you must pay high placement fees. You must pay a price for being choosey and over demanding. You pay a price for not being sensible and appreciative.

      Stop pointing fingers on employers who failed to guide you to the right way because you wanted to remain stubborn, princess-attitude and untrainable.

    3. I would suggest you change maid as there is already a bad start. In future, I would suggest that a minimum set of house key is required for your helper in case of fire - you cannot lock your maid up in the house and let her burn to death. In case of emergency of your kids - she need to be able to get help. I suggest you install a camera at various corners of the house to help you monitor any intruders. Make friends with your neighbours so that you can watch over each other. In my humble opinion - limiting normal coffee / tea / milo beverages to your workers does not sound working for you comfortable - wearing bras at all times is also not possible especially near her sleep time in her sleep quarters. You can go into her room to talk to her if it is late at night so she does not have to change her outfit again just to answer a few questions - if she wears see through clothes walking into the kitchen when there is a chance of bumping into your husbands / sons of course you should issue stern warnings but you should not expect her to wear bra 24/7 especially near her sleep time in her sleep quarters.

    4. That milo thing sounds creepy also.. Well it's only a drinks.. It would not be a big deal.. Housemaids will not hide anything if you're just capable with explaining

    5. Why not hire a caregiver instead of a maid?

  3. What exactly is the crime with a maid texting or calling her cousin?!!? Do you not call and text your own family? WHY would you take her mobile phone from her? She works for you - you do not OWN her. Do you have a job and if so does your employer demand to take your mobile phone from you? What is wrong with you...??? If she is relaxing in private in her room at 9pm (probably getting ready to sleep) why is she not allowed to remove her bra? You are the one who called her from her room...
    It seems to me that when some people get a maid then a cruel, bullying, evil, power crazy streak in them comes to the surface. Remember we are all born equal in the eyes of God.

    1. Maid did not pay her employer for a room, no rental received so she has no rights to do whatever she wants in her place of employment. The place of employment is a place an employee works, earn a salary, not a place to have fun and widen her circle of social friends at the expense of her boss. How I wish maids are slaves so that we don't receive disobedience and problems from FDWs.

      Local Women in Spore go to work in proper attire and definitely with bras. Some Angmohs go to beaches topless and some leaving their houses without wearing bras. If maids behave like angmohs, they shouldn't accept a FDW job. Who is she to demand these and that from her employer and worse of all, thought she is in the right track. By not giving your boss the basic respect and work accordiing to house rules, you failed as a human being.

    2. I agree with 'Anonymous'. How wonderful if maids were slaves. Then employers (owners) would be assured that they would receive the deference, respect and service they deserve. Maids are NOT equal to their owners, and should at all times be subservient, obedient and humble, or suffer the consequences.

    3. Hortensia, you are a despicable person. How dare you say maids should be treated as slaves. Maids are equal to their employers, and must be treated with respect!

    4. I believe you didn't read Hortensia's and above comments. What we're trying to highlight is "How wonderful if maids were slaves. Then employers (owners) would be assured that they would receive the deference, respect and service they deserve"

      If sg maids are really slaves, employers will become the OWNERS, fully in-charge. Means Slaves have no rights nor any say in the bad owners' hands. Slaves are treated like we own them, not paid timely nor given any benefits as human!! Are you a maid or slave? Obviously, not a slave! Look at the FDW terms agency and MOM made us offer, do you get such salary and live-in benefits in your own country? A degree holder in the source country doesn't enjoy the pay and benefits we gave so don't be so unreasonable and greedy. Too many of you living in Spore so employers ended up as being bullied but nobody to care and fight for us.

      Sg Maids and Foreigners are too pampered and demand these and that. If Spore is really so bad and unfair to you, meaning your country can offer better terms, go back home, don't stay here!

      The issue or problem in Spore is, maids ARE NOT SLAVES nor can they be treated like slaves. Maids/FDWs are highly paid bad-attitude-princesses who are unwilling or cannot perform a proper FDW job yet demanding human rights or respect, eg as a cheater or loafer.

      How I wish maids are slaves so that SHE CANNOT BULLY ME!
      Because FDWs are not slaves, I ended up being bullied mentally and financially. This isn't fair to another human being. You're human, so am I.

    5. Well said!!! They only know how to lie and lie.. no matter how good we treat them they will never treat us as friends. they are all ungrateful princesses. who come here to look pretty and some so desperate to seduce a construction worker or moonlight. these maid are nothing but dirty. go bk to your own country and don dirty our home! Pamela What is your problem!!! We are trying to protect our own house our children. maybe you have not been cheated by a maid before. one day you should have a try of betrayer from your so call good frd!

  4. I have just read that for your new maid you took her phone and told her she must keep her bedroom door open at all times! You unfit to employ anyone, and you have told the world this in your OWN words.

    1. Want privacy? pay for a room, simple! Tell yr employer DO NOT DISTURB after 9pm. Wat for make employer accept yr pattern. U didnt offer free services. U are a paid to live-in n work maid.
      Must spend time on mobile anytime u like? Feel employer inhuman or unfair to u, pay wat u owe n get lost! Sit at yr agency n see who wants to employ people like u.

    2. It's right and proper that the maid's quarters are at all times open to its owner. In fact the maid is spoilt to have its own quarters. In the Middle East, maids typically sleep on the floor in the kitchen or in a utility room, so as to be always available to their owners. Giving a maid access to a phone is ridiculous. I refuse phone privileges to my maid, and she's prohibited from speaking to anyone but me. Singaporeans are too soft and kind.

    3. Hortensia, maids deserve to have their own living quarters. They should also have hand phones to keep in touch with their family and loved ones. I think you are too cruel!

    4. Maid has no rights to demand for her own room. The law didn't state that!!
      Don't act like employers owe you!! This is not being cruel. If you stay in your own country, your employment won't include living expenses and accommodation.

      If you want to have your own room and hold your mobile phone 24/7 (use phone in the night eg after 8pm is OK), stay in your own house, remain in your country, don't come to Spore and bring your princess-problems/attitude. REMEMBER, EMPLOYERS DON'T OWE YOU A WORKING LIFE ie BETTER THAN YOUR OWN COUNTRY.

    5. you really talk without brain. what size pigeon brain you have? the maid pay for the room rental la. you can sleep naked inside also can. house gt house rules. you come here to work in ppl house you have to respect ppl house rule. so if that maid is a employer you think she will allow her "maid" to walk around her house not wearing a bra with a white top! WE DON OWN YOU SHIT! WE PAY YOUR PAY ON TIME! STOP BEING A PRINCESS AND DEMAND THIS AND THAT!

    6. basically on MOM rules she just need a privacy for her to rest thats all. nothing much.

  5. Pamela
    Every employee/maid has a job requirement to fulfil. If the job stated FDW cannot hold her mobile and use as and when she desires, must wear bra or keep bedroom door open, as a FDW who has committed to a job, it is her duty to carry out her employer's house rules.

    You are not fit or have any rights to condemn any employer who is the owner of the house, an employer who had been very honest to state her rules. Maids who want to lie, too demanding, very dishonest is doing something very wrong!

    Initially I wanted to delete your comments but kept to let others see what kind of maids have been recruited in Spore. By being dishonest, you're telling the people reading your comments, dishonesty is a right way for maids and employers should keep/tolerate a person who lies. We are born equal, you are right about this point but has employer been treated equally? Ask yourself, if we lie to you, will you be happy? If I promise you something but break my promise, will you be disappointed and unhappy?

    Spore has no policy that states maid has the rights to own a private room nor encouraged maids to go bra-less at their employers' house. Maids should respect their employers, especially she doesn't own that house or room, it is a place where another man/men live. She is a paid to live-in helper not a princess or a hooker.

    If having a mobile is a neccesity, you should return home and spend your time with your love ones or friends, use as much time you want with them. You don't respect your employer and do not have the mentality to perform a proper job as domestic maid. It is your fault to accept a job offer for such employer. You ought to blame yourself. Don't think you are in the right or being unlucky to have such an employer. My current maid, if you've read my blog is another person who lies and broke promises that she made during interviews. She was given enough time to think over, share views with her friends/agent re: my requirements yet she purposely lied and stepped into my house, then kept pestering me (her 8th employer) for requests that she knew I can't and won't agree. It is her fault, not about her bad luck. Having the wrong working mentality and too stubborn are my maid's problems of not being able to find employer who could tolerate her for 2-years.... not even her ex-Filipino employer. She kept thinking she's in the right to make requests, disregards the key words about 'HONESTY' and being Co-operative.

    Lastly, as a maid, if you must go bra-less in your employer's premises, you should return home at your own costs or find a place fit for sluts to stay.

  6. Maid who refuse do a gd job shld get out. Dont accuse employer force u. U made the choice n signed contract with superb clear mind. If u cant find any spoil mkt ppl to employ u as gd life maid, do soul searching, obviously our requirements r common n u r the ones over demanding, thot u cream of crop n so desirable? Get the hell out of our sight, nobody like to spend money employ u, thot u work for free? We want our dollars worth n not b manipulated.
    Behave like maid if u really need a decent salary as maid which is so much higher than the professionals in yr own country. Dont come here make employers b yr stepping stones or nannies. Just get out of spore for goodness sake.

  7. consideration, understanding, proper communication and just be civilized people.. i think that what makes a good relationship between employers and employees... i like this blog.. i learnt so much from it...different experiences from real employers... ill take it as a positive thoughts.. for i will soon be working in singapore as A FOREIGN HOUSE WORKER.

    1. Good Luck. and god bless. hope you'll meet a good employer.whoever you are. i have a sister working w/ the indian expat in singapore for 4 months now. every single day she worked from 6a.m to 11pm at night,and every saturday she sleep so late at night coz her employers having a party until 5 a.m. and then work again sunday, all day long. on her day off suppose to be, shes made to work before she can get out of the house on her day off, 11am shes allowed to get out of the house. her lady boss, stayed at home everyday coz she doesn't work at all, she bullied my sister all the time. a little bit of mistake, she will make your day miserable. Its not easy to be a maid so my sissy said.they dont treat u like human, they treat u like a robbot or a machine. employers doesn't follow MOM policy. and my sister is not allowed to use a washing machine to wash her own clothes,she has to washed her clothes w/ her own bear hands. how can u washed ur clothes when ur fingers are soar coz of chopping too many onions everyday.Indian likes to eat onions everyday.so my sissy says.

    2. juz becos maid gotta wash her clothes with her own hands, you say this is not being treated like human? You people are damn pampered. There's no law to say maid cannot hand wash her own clothes and employer must give her a washing machine to use. I can wash some of my clothes with my own bare hands why not maids? Maid wears so many and has tonnes of own clothes to wash everyday??!! Indian expat made maid chop onions and you're complaining. What about those locals who has to work in food stalls chopping everyday and spending a lot of time using their hands? Some locals had their hands soaked in pails of soap to wash bowls, the detergent is very strong, you mean they are living better than you? They are paid lesser than maids because they do not enjoy live-in benefits like you! Do you mean locals shouldn't take up jobs that requires strength and time, something like hard work? Just a few pieces of clothes and onions and you people are whining. Not happy, go home loh, who forcing you to stay? Go home tell your family you don't want to lift your precious fingers to do any work, just want to be supported and cared by them like a ungrown child.

      On the part of off day still need to work till 11am, I do agree that employer is too much. This point, you've my support. I believe maids should get a good rest by having at least 8 hours undisturbed rest each day.

    3. and an off day in my opinion, should be at least 10 hours, excluding the 8 hours undisturbed sleeping time. Some employers may want maids to help a bit but if your maid is unhappy to lift her fingers on off days, showing black face, it is better to leave her alone. Maid still has the next day as an official working day and the following few days so it is a matter of adjusting your habit and lifestyle to satisfy MOM's new law.

      I try to be an understanding and reasonable boss so I hope my maid will one day appreciate what I'm trying to do to make her happy. No employer can stand a pampered maid. Maid is employed to help, not here to cause some disaster and avoidable headaches.

    4. It is infuriating to see maids complaining and demanding for this and that. Maids used their brains to annoy employers and made themselves looked self-centred, unwelcomed and disgusting. In this blog, Winter has been clear on what maids did to employers. There are many links to support the fact that not all employers are bad. More and more employers are being taken advantaged by their maids and agencies.

      MOM printed this in the handbook “Most employers provide their FDWs with at least eight hours of continuous break from work. As work arrangements in a domestic household setting are varied, you should discuss and mutually agree with your employer on the time and duration of rest day. Generally, employer may ask your FDWs to perform light duties.”

      For those maids who can’t stop asking for more and living in a world of they are badly treated here, let me tell you the facts. On MOM website, it is clearly stated You and Your employer can mutually agree on which day of the week is FDW rest day and it does not have to be a Sunday.

      FDWs who moonlight on their rest days are committing an offence and can be fined up to $20,000 and/or jailed up to 2 years.

      Salaries are determined by your source country and how much your service is worth. If you think your performance warrant better pay and benefits, discuss with your employer. Don’t just complain because you’ve nothing better to do or has a bad habit of bad mouthing employers. You shouldn’t be slandering employers, be it yours or your friends. If the discussion didn’t’ work, find another employer. Many agencies are waiting for you to feed them. Otherwise, you can go to another country such as Hong Kong.

      Employers that I know usually tell their maids what is expected of them. It is usually the maids who do not accept instructions or work scope readily. They deliberately lied, give employers bad attitude and lousy job performance to piss them off. They wanted lighter scope of work but dare not voice out because they know that is not right. Maids felt employers ought to detect their wishes and by all means, satisfy their unlawful demands, give in and do their best to make the maids happy. By having a happy maid, maid felt that is how a human should be treated and respected. They are on the receiving end, with minds programmed not to give good service and earn a reward. They forgot who paid them. They forgot there are laws in Spore to ensure a relationship between maid and employer is properly established, with the intention of FDWs to be well taken care by employers.

    5. My advice to anyone going to a job interview is to not be passive, be honest, be proactive, and interview your employer too! If you get to pick your employer, interview to find a good employer, one that is good for you! Compare and contrast

      Questions I have came up with for babysitting:

      - Have your child ever acted out physically against anyone? (I love tutoring slow kids because it's rewarding - but I cannot handle violent kids - I once babysat a birthday party where I had to pick up a kid who was throwing trucks at another kid - dealing with this daily is too much, the liability is too high - I later learnt that the truck-throwing kid ended up half-blinded (long after party), while stomping during a temper-fit, he flipped up a fork that freakishly got him in the eye)

      - Does your child have any allergies? Any medical conditions I should be aware of?

      - Will your kid obey my authority while under my sole care? (When I say, no TV till your homework is done properly and no more than one and a half hour - don't get into a situation where the parent blames you for homework not being done, or being unhappy about it, when they have a kid that don't listen, and refuse to do something about it)

      - Other than emergencies (shortness of breath, turning blue - dial 911), under what circumstances should I take your kid to your family doctor if I can't reach you at work? (fever, weird looking stool)
      -- know the family doctor
      -- know what directions to give on 911 before you have to call - street address, intersection, landmarks -- this advice I would hammer in for younger babysitters who are dropped off at the house they would be babysitting by their own parents so they might not even know the address in a panic!

      - Is your child allow to have friends over when you are not around? (Especially with the older children, ask this before you get surprised)

      - For pre-elementary-school children: Is your child already house broken? The average age for kids to be toilet trained is two, but some have problems at age six. Does your kid need to be accompanied to the bathroom?

      ...and ask if there is anything their kid is not suppose to watch/eat/do - common sense isn't common and neither is common practice...some parents let their kids watch R rated films, some not even Goosebumps due to nightmares. Many parents I know keeps sodas in the fridge for their guests but the KIDS are not allow to have it because sugar is bad for their health. Sometimes their kids are allowed on the internet but not on webcam. etc

      ALWAYS meet the child and /both/ parents before agreeing. There have been cases of babysitters being raped by the father of the child before - it's probably more dangerous if you are going to be a live in FDW - trust your instincts. A proper gentleman should leave the bulk of the interaction between you and his wife, definitely not remotely flirty to a woman who will be working under his roof. You should dress conservatively to avoid awkwardness but conservative dress is not a shield against sexual assault and harassment.

      *rubs chin in thought* In North America, there are babysitting courses for teenage girls that cover first aid - do FDW in Singapore even get first aid training? Some of the stories I've heard...

  8. employer's wanted to be respected.agree w/ that but if u bound to have an employer's hounding their maid's everyday,off course maid's would absolutely lost their patience. employer's has to understand maids are human being, they got feelings etc. maid's are not robbot or machine.i beleive if u dont like ur maid's ,you have other choice return them to the agency, instead of abusing them verbally.

    1. You gave employer your patience to accept your bad attitude? If you've provoked your employer by the way you carry out duties and resulted in any verbal unhappiness, you felt you've nothing to self correct?
      If verbal abusing is something so serious and made you feel not treated like human or became a robot, go home or go back to agency, who forcing you to stay?

      Go home tell your family you don't want to lift your precious fingers to do any hand work, listen to instructions, just want to be supported and cared by them like an ungrown child. Remember to tell your family to pay every cent you owe employer. Employer doesn't owe you anything. Most employers gave maids sufficient patience and care but maids do not appreciate. You are an example of such kind.

  9. It is not easy to find a good maid. A contractor came to my place to do some repair work. The bangala asked my maid for her mobile number and there onwards nightly phone conversation lasted till 1 am. My maid got pregnant by the bangala and she cry for many days and she do not want to go home as she is pregnant. Out of pity we send her for abortion and continued to employed her. The bangala disappeared when she was pregnant and cannot be located. Maids please wake up the man that bring you out take you as a sex object.....sex for free better quality than geylang.

  10. Can i complain ny employer bcoz every time i have mistake she call me idiot,stupid,and shouting me even a lot of people hear i know maid make mistake sometimes coz we not perfect we are only human...but my employer not temper her mouth every time she angry...is this case i can fnish my contract to her...

    1. To err is human, nobody is perfect. If you're so perfect, you won't be here working as maid.
      I always remind my FDW, it is true nobody is perfect but kept making same mistakes after reminders and unwilling to write down since JA claimed she's forgetful, this is incorrect mentality. It is bad working attitude and unwilling or didn't try hard to become a good helper.

      To me, my prideful FDW is not stupid nor an idiot. She is too clever, stubborn and trying to make me accept her the way she wants to be and successful glide her way towards a 2-year contract.

      Nobody is perfect, so am I.
      I will be angry but nowadays, I forced myself not to scold her... tell myself opening my mouth is a waste of energy and saliva. I have said what JA need to know. Printed what she has to abide and do in my house .... so up to her to think ... want this job or find another employer who can tolerate her. I will record her behaviour/mistakes/working attitude in my heart. The day she hits my limit, I shall not be soft on her. I still have the option to keep her or kick her when she's enjoying her advance home leave.

    2. My mom's ex helper had worked for us for 10 years. She is allowed to watch tv, use computer, use her own mobile phone at during her free time without permission from my mom.. in her job wise she is good.. she wakes up at 6am everyday sleeps at 10 to 11pm everyday.. she finished all her house chores SUPER fast..
      6am - boil water, wash clothes, prepare breakfast,
      6.30 - wake my little brother up for school. prepare his uniform, bags shoes.
      7am - walk my brother to school
      7.15am - marketing
      8am - hang clothes, sweep, mop floor
      9 am - walk my dog
      9.30am - prepare coffee for my mom and wakes her up
      She'll prepare lunch, fold and iron clothes, make the bed etc.. by 2pm she almost finish all her job.. by the way, she almost 24/7 on the phone..
      I believe if we give them benefits, they will be more willing to do their jobs happily and willing..
      I am now an employer of a helper too.. seldom restrict her from doing her own things nor restrict her from drinking my milo or eat my cookies.. if she wants to drink or eat then just go ahead la.. y dont let people eat? i am just very strict on hygiene and ways of handling my kids.. sometimes i know its kinda blood boiling on their ways of doing things but u just got to tell her the reason behind ur rules la.. i also want my helper to feel happy and easy working with me.. i bet u won't want ur boss to treat u like this also right?

  11. Maids are human beings and deserve to be treated with respect and dignity. This is just basic human decency. They should not be over-worked, and should have rights to keep in contact with their family and loved ones. At a minimum, they should be entitled to one off day per week.

  12. A topless body of headless woman was fished out of Whampoa River. I am praying hard it is a maid so that MOM and Halimah Yacob know what they did by mandating weekly off days and insist we give special employment terms to FDWs. Gave maids off days and abundant chances to perform badly as FDW? MOM has no policy to ensure maids learn, behave, become good workers and adjust to our lifestyle.

    Spore is a place that welcomes lousy maids. Pay and Pay, each time the cost to hire maid gets higher than before but we ended up suffering more and receive low maids quality. What's this? Punishment to employ maids? Punishment for trying to work and earn a decent income as a woman? Punishment to hold pink ICs? Penalty for not being born with golden spoon or sitting on the top?

    1. Victim is not a maid. Husband and wife are foreigners working in Spore.
      Police have arrested a 25-year old Indian national in connection with the murder of a headless woman. The man, believed to be a friend of the victim and her husband, 33-year-old Indian national, Harvinder Singh is on the run.

      Sad to say, your comments is what our govt is currently doing to us - Punishment to employ FDWs. Olden days, women stay home to take care of children with only one breadwinner yet borned many children. With higher costs of living, modern women have to work but need domestic helpers at home. Our govt is not pro-family nor being considerate to full-time working women who are not high income earners.

  13. Much as I sympathize some maids who faced bad employers. I am sure most know where to run and cry for help, especially when most maids have mobile phones, off days and friends.

    Word has to spread that you obey the law in Singapore and adhere to Employer's house rules so that you can make a good living. If you can't, please don't be a pain in the neck and remain in Spore.

  14. Family Rules (extracted from Hongkong website)

    1. Our relationship is based on trust. Please be honest, hard working, clean and tidy. Then we will treat you well like a part of our family.

    2. Personal hygiene, the house’s tidiness and cleanliness is very important, especially to baby.

    3. If you need anything, have any problem or not happy with us in any way, be frank and discuss with us. Don’t hide your feeling. We will treat you as a part of our family and try our best to help.

    4. If feeling sick, tell us immediately, we will pay for all medical expenses. Don’t take drug or wait. You may spread to baby.

    5. Don’t take money from home without asking. Please be honest to us.

    6. Never ever borrow from finance company, no matter how many benefits they said they could offer. These are all lies and you will end up in trouble and never be able to repay their money. Many of them are loan sharks and run by triads. If you have financial problems, talk to us.

    7. Don’t open the door and let anyone in the house when we are not at home. No matter whom they claim they are. No matter they are policemen, government officers, employers of gas, water, electricity companies, or the building watchmen, or anyone. Sometimes wrongdoers may lie, pretend they are sent by us and say we have accidents, trying to cheat your money or ask you to let them in and rob. Be very careful. This is very popular in Hong Kong. Always call us immediately. In case you can’t find us and have serious problems, call 999 for the police or ambulance.

    8. You need to help us to protect all furniture, floor and everything inside our house. If you damage them, we have a right to deduct your salary.

    9. Please help to save money, e.g. don’t waste water, gas or electricity. Don’t use air-conditioner, especially when we are not around, unless allowed in advance. We are not rich. Otherwise, we may not have money to hire you for long.

    10. Don’t read our letters, files, books, photos albums or any documents for personal privacy. We will not read yours either.

    11. Don’t tell other people, e.g. the neighbour, your friends, or anyone, anything about us. Please respect our personal privacy. We will respect your privacy too.

    12. Mrs. will take care of everything about the family. Talk to Mrs. if you have any questions or problems. Don’t bring them to Mr. or my parents privately.

    13. Don’t take anything from the house, even just borrow for a few hours or a day, unless you have asked us and are allowed. Again, our relationship bases on trust.

    14. Never spit in the kitchen sink. It’s for food only. Not for personal cleaning or washing clothes. You should do it only in the bathroom sink.

    15. If you need to use IDD, you need to buy your own phone card. You cannot use our phone to call IDD / local call. Never accept collect call, it’s much more expensive. If you use it without permission, charges will be born to you and deducted from your salary in the same month.

    16. You can use your mobile phone only when you are day off.

    17. Don’t give our address and telephone numbers to anyone, especially strangers and employment agents.

    18. The helper shall not take any personal telephone calls during duty, to avoid negligence of helper’s duty and taking care of child/children. In case of an emergency occurs, be sure to ring employer immediately and ask for specific instructions.

  15. GENERAL MANNER WHILE ON DUTY (extracted from Hongkong website)

    1. You must be polite and greet the employer, his family members, relatives and visitors.

    2. Don’t forget to say THANK YOU at appropriate times.

    3. When visitors come to the house, a maid must always serve the visitors with drink such as tea, juice or soft drink and never hide away after the visitor enter the house.

    4. If your employer happens to play mahjong game with friends in the house, you have to serve them with drinks from time to time. This is normal practice for a maid in Hong Kong.

    5. Always be pleasant and respectful to old people in the house.

    6. You must be Obedient and Respectful to the employers.

    7. Always Follow Employers’ Instruction. If you do not understand any instruction given to you, ask your employer to repeat by saying “PARDON ME MADAM/SIR”. It is better to make sure than just to do something wrong.

    8. Be Initiative and Efficient in executing your duties without the employers prompting.

    9. You must follow the instruction and working schedule closely.
    10. Should not smoke and drink alcoholics.

    11. Telephone manner is important. You must be polite and able to take message for employer during employer’s absence from home.

    12. Do not take afternoon naps.

    13. Always knock the door before entering your employer’s bedroom or the rooms for other family members.

    14. DO NOT bring any booms to your employer’s house, because of Chinese superstition.

    15. DO NOT write any letters during your working days, do it on your holidays.


    1. It is dangerous in Hong Kong to let stranger to enter the house. Always identify the visitor at the door politely, inform your employer before opening the door.

    2. Always pull the key out after you lock of open the door.

    3. DO NOT talk with other maids, security guards and strangers about your employers home.

    4. MUST lock the doors, gates and windows whenever leave the house.

    5. MUST NOT leave the flame and electrical appliance (including lights) on whenever you leave the house.

    6. MUST keep all kinds of medicine, detergent and cutting tools/knives in a safe place, out of reach of the children.

    7. MUST turn off the gas heater, stove, ventilator, vacuum dust cleaner or cooker every time after use.

    8. Dry your hand before use the electrical appliance.

    9. If you smell any gas, open all the windows and switch off the main gas switch. DO NOT touch any electrical appliance nor use the telephone. Any electrical spark may cause explosion. Bring the children to the security counter at the lobby immediately and use the phone there to call your employers.

    10. Dial 999 when there is fire or serious accident. Call your employer immediately, too.

    1. Always wash your hands before preparing food or cooking.

    2. To be hygienic, MUST take bath daily, wash hands after dumping the garbage or going to toilet.

    3. Your hair must be short and tidy.

    4. Keep your personal belongings clean and tidy.

    5. When bathing, only use the bathing gel and shampoo. You are not allowed to use your employer’s cosmetics such as cleanser and lotion, etc.

    6. DO NOT eat in the bedroom.

    7. DO NOT use any nail polish on finger and toes while on duty.

    8. DO NOT put on make-up while on duty, even when you are going out to do family shopping.

    9. DO NOT wear tight jeans, pants, low-cut or tight T-shirt while you are working. Do not go the parlour in pyjamas.

    10. Must take bath daily before going to bed, and wash you own cloths separately from those of your employer and the children (especially the under-wear), don’t wash your own cloths by the washing machine together with theirs.

    11. If your employer requests you to wear uniform, you must obey and you have no right to refuse.

    12. DO NOT use employer’s belongings and articles, if you want to eat some snack food besides those food for breakfast, lunch and dinner (e.g. candy, nuts, fruits, cakes, soft-drink, etc.) you must ask for your employer’s permission.

    13. NEVER eat with fingers and hands when at table. MUST use chopsticks, or spoon, or fork. Never start eating before your employer.

    14. DO NOT chat with your friends on the phone and never ring your friends unless with the consent of your employer to do so.

    15. MUST NOT bring visitors to the employer’s house unless with the consent of the employer.

    16. NEVER gather with other Filipino maids near your living place, especially when you are bringing their kids down to the street to catch the school bus or going to the market. You give very bad impress to your employer if they see you chatting or laughing with your Filipino friends outside their house or down the street.

  18. GENERAL REQUIREMENTS OF DUTIES (extracted from Hongkong website)
    1. You will be required to sleep and attend the child/children, even during the night time.
    2. All drinking water must be boiled to boiling point before serving. All electrical appliances and rice cookers cannot be dipped into water for washing. Clean with a piece of slightly wet cloth.
    3. Use separate towels for different purpose. Such as sweeping floor, cleaning furniture, cleaning dining table, washing oily dishes, washing cups, washing basin and washing toilet, you should use separate towel for each purpose.
    4. Washing of car and caring of pets (e.g. dogs and cats) are part of your duties, with NO EXTRA ALLOWANCE.
    5. Do child’s own laundry or hand wash when necessary
    6. It is important to save the valuable resource of earth. Do not over-consume the water and detergent.

    General Household Tasks

    1. The helper should inform the employer before any household items and food stuff is out of stock. As instructed by the employer, the helper should go to the market to purchase the required items.
    2. The helper shall not open any drawers, closets and safe locked of the employer.
    3. The household cleaning duties generally covers the following areas:
    -Bedroom floor, windows, desk tops, wardrobes, lampshades & mirrors.
    Sitting and dining room
    -Telephone, lampshades, light bulbs, cupboard, tea table, furniture in the room.
    -Cupboards, wall tiles, cooker, gas stove, pots, kitchen sink, kitchen floor, exhaust fan, kitchen utensils and garbage bucket.
    -Bathroom floor, bathroom wall tiles, mirror, toilet sink, toilet bowl and shower area.
    Electrical Appliances
    -Television, refrigerator, washing machine, electric water pot, bender/food processor, electric fan, vacuum cleaner, steamers, iron, telephones, shavers, sewing machine, ovens, toasters and air conditioning.

  19. DUTIES
    1. Take good care of child/children even when she is playing and sleeping.
    2. Feeding child/children patiently and encourage her to feed herself.
    3. Accompany and play with child/children as a big sister after finishing necessary household work.
    4. Train child/children to be discipline. (NO beating is allowed)
    5. Clean the toys once a week.

    * NEVER leave child/children unattended at any time or any place. Always pay attention to child/children even when doing household work.

    * NEVER leave child/children alone in the bathtub when bathing.

    * Dump the garbage every night when Mum/Sir is at home.

    * NEVER beat or hurt her no matter how naughty she is. Tell Mum/Sir when they are back.

    * When bathing, both in summer and winter, get the water ready first before take off the clothes of child/children. Do not let her get cold.

    * Report to Mum/Sir if there is any unusual behavior or sickness symptom of child/children.

    * Pay special attention to road safety. Use proper facilities such as zebra crossing, subway or passenger bridge to cross the road.

    * Taking care of child/children is of top importance ahead of any housework. Be careful of child/children safety. Inform us immediately if you find anything’s wrong with child/children, no matter how small is the problem. If you can’t find us, call my parents. In the event of emergency, call 999 for police or ambulance.

    * When child/children is awake, you must stay and keep an eye on him.

    * Don’t leave the child/children on the sofa or bay window.

    * Don’t shake the child/children.

    * When the child/children is as sleep, remember to switch on the mosquito repellent.

    * You must test the milk’s & congee’s temperature before you feed the child/children. Remember don’t over-shake the bottle.

    * If child/children does anything wrong when he grows older, tell us. Don’t punish him yourself.

    * You can only do the household chores when child/children is as sleep. Always keep an eye on him.

    * Every time before you prepare food, or milk to child/children, you must wash your hands with soap. Please remember, personal hygiene is very important in this house.

  20. The employer may in writing terminate the contract without notice or payment in lieu of notice if you, in relation to the employment:
    a. wilfully disobey a lawful and reasonable order,
    b. commit misconduct, such misconduct being inconsistent with the due and faithful discharge of your duties,
    c. are guilty of fraud or dishonesty,
    d. are habitually neglectful in your duties,
    e. are unfit for further service as certified by a medical practitioner, or
    f. certified that you have hepatitis B & AIDS.
    1. You must avoid get loan from financer or be guarantor of any loan.

    2. Should you have any dishonest and misconduct behaviors being found, we must send to the Police for justice.

    3. You are not allowed to leave Hong Kong during your contract period without consent of your employers.

    4. DO NOT leave the house without asking permission from employer.

    5. Part-time jobs outside are strictly forbidden.

    I, the undersigned, agree and consider the above regulations are REASONABLE AND ACCEPTABLE and I am willing to observe them and be cooperative with my employer if being employed to Hong Kong.

  21. After witnessing how a maid treated an elderly last week, I couldn't agree more with what you said about maids. Most of them, you give them an inch, they want a yard. All we want is a sincere extra pair of helping hands to look aft our love ones (parents, kids) while we struggle to make ends meet. Why is it so hard?

  22. Who earns lesser than FDWs?

    Pampered and Demanding Maids

    MOM doesn't care about FDW's employer

  23. Well, well. This is going to make you implode with fury. My Filipino helper receives 950 SG a month. She has all evenings and public holidays off including her birthday. Every Sunday off and can leave on Saturday night. She has her own room and double bed that are her private. I always knock and wait to be answered. Our helper shares our utensils and is welcome to eat from our fridge. She is a grown woman, has a boy friend and talks on her mobile phone whenever she wants. Her day starts at 6.00 on a school day but after taking the children to school she is welcome to go back to sleep until 10.00 because unlike a sadistic and cruel employer I don't think she should do things just beacause she is being paid. Then our helper works until about 6.30 or 7.00 pm. After she has showered the children then she is free to do as she will. And how does she repay us for this kindness and respect. Well, let me tell you. With honesty, diligence. love, loyalty, compassion and respect, that's how.

    Personally, I think most of you above are inhuman and if you lived in Europe you would have been prosecuted and imprisoned for extreme cruelty by now. Singapore doesn't eve have a human rights charter! Four years ago you were tied with Nigeria for Human Right infringements. That is something to be deeply ashamed off. You will never be taken seriously as a first world country until you treat others from different cultures as you would like to be treated.

    How do you even look at yourselves in the mirror in the mornings.

    You are a disgrace.

    1. I believe it your rights to overpay the maid but most local employers felt FDWs DON'T deserve a salary of S$950 and we have not short-changed our FDWs. We are law abiding citizens and all FDWs are well protected by the Ministry of Manpower, at Employers' expenses.

      I wonder whether you have looked at the mirror and see how hideous you look. Yes, you've paid your FDW very well, about 1 times more than the usual FDWs. You are making the market to be unbalanced and bringing unnecessary problems to the employers. We've a standard contract to follow, no FDWs were cheated or short-changed. If you have plenty of money to offer your FDW, go ahead but you shouldn't say we're in the wrong or a disgrace.

      You've disgraced yourself by not looking at our costs of living, our salary and sparing a thought for others. You didn't compare apples to apples. I believe you're educated to do proper comparison ... just a matter of whether you want or not.

      Every country has different culture and LIVING COSTS. You or spouse's monthly salary could be 10 times of mine, you think this is normal? You felt it is right to make remarks that doesn't fit into our context. Your maid could be eating only 1 to 5% of your salary. It really isn't much if you look in the form of percentage. But if using my salary, it is a a lot of difference! Be an asshole somewhere else. Don't pollute Spore.

      btw,read who earns lesser than maids

      You're a devil so don't make yourself look like an angel and cause pain to others. We're already suffering in the hands of bad maids and facing lots of unfairness ie MOM's pro-maid policies.

      When you're bitten by your highly paid maid, Iet me know so that I can be joyful or be less jealous... let me know God is fair in some way.

    2. Dear Volequeen,
      good on you that you have a maid who repay you with kindness diligence loyalty respect for giving her all the things that she asked for. Lucky you. I must say that some Filipina maids are good, trustworthy and diligent. I employed maids from Filipines, Indonesia, Myanmar and I found Filipina are the easiest to talk to and the most intelligent. Most of them are good christians and this helps in the way they react, interact with others as well. If you feel that your maid is worth SG950, go ahead. I am sure she was worth it and it is your prerogative and your right to do as you like. I have known some employers to pay their maids more than what you did to run their households and drive their cars for them. If they can do all these, good. They deserve the salary they are getting. I am sure you will agree with me that employees should be paid for what they CAN DO and DO WELL. Employees should be treasured and paid evenmore if they demonstrate good work attitude and ethics and are not calculative. The same applies for maids. I am sure many employers on this blog did not treat their maids any lesser than you did, Volequeen. Granted that you may give the best perks but don't tell me you're the only saintly employer who walks on Singapore soil. I can tell you that not many of those who treated their maids well got the kind of returns that you had. First your comments lacked insight and empathy, showing that you consider yourself a cut above the rest, filled with self-righteousness. If your attitude on this blog is to put others down by calling them a disgrace, and verbally spat on them, simply because they vent their anger and frustrations on this blog, all I can say is that your views can't be all that good and deserving of respect or worth listening to. Perhaps you might want to consider changing your id to "Vile Queen" instead. That would be more honest and deserving of respect from the posters on this blog.

      History has taught us all that people like you, Volequeen, have come to our part of the world, only to impose your idiologies, your values, in a way that seems to tell us that ONE SIZE FITS ALL.
      Please, please learn one thing: NO one situation, NO one maid, NO one employer, is ever the same as another. One size doesn't fit all. Learn to see things from many perspectives. This is called having Empathy. Then perhaps you can also work well with maids from other nationalities, OTHER THAN Filipinas.
      You said:
      " You will never be taken seriously as a first world country until you treat others from different cultures as you would like to be treated". THE SAME APPLIES TO YOU AND ALL THOSE WHOSE VIEWS ARE SIMILAR TO YOURS.

  24. I've never lived in Singapore but live in an African country where it is usual for Europeans to have help in the house. I, like Volequeen above, choose to treat my helper as a human being. I have worked as a housekeeper and know how it feels to be treated as a non person. OK, I have had difficulties where helpers have cheated me and have taken advantage. These are disenfranchised and vulnerable women who are often struggling alone to bring up their chidren. They suffer the kind of poverty and difficulties most Europeans can hardly imagine. For God's sake, yes, keep your valuabe property and your children safe but please consider treating these workers of yours with a little more respect. They are human beings not monsters from outer space. And don't come back at me and say I don't understand your situation. I've read nearly all this blog and I think I've got the general gist of things.

    1. You posted here for what? Is it a joy to land your feet on others? What you commented showed you didn't read well. I posted with facts and not hearsay.

      You didn't live here nor know the locals' living costs and salary. Don't show your wilful and obstinate ignorance ... stop acting like you are a nice person or life saviour. As I always say, only those who have been bullied by bad maids (both mentally and financially) will know the taste. No activist will understand without going thru the ordeal.

      We are law abiding citizens and all foreign domestic maids are well protected by the Ministry of Manpower, at Employers' expenses.... even if the maid is a bad worker. If maids are ill-treated and not well taken care of, MOM won't hesitate to fine or punish the employers SEVERELY. Maids don't get punished severely for being bad, including killing somebody vulnerable.... did you open your eyes to read the real facts that took place?

  25. Judging another person or a country's regulation is no way a foreigner or a foreign FDW's employer should behave. Each country has its own laws and employment terms. Both you and your maid can choose not to remain in Spore. No dumbos will stay in a foreign country that doesn't pay well. Are you telling me maids have no brain?

    If you want to earn money in Spore, respect this country and the citizens' way of life. Who gave you the rights to impose your theory on others and expecting us to follow? Accusing others they are inhuman displayed your unchecked ignorance. Ignorance if unchecked, leads to insolence. Any overbearing conduct is not welcomed.

    Poverty isn't an excuse for foreigners to be unruly. Spore doesn't owe any foreigners a good salary package here. Nobody is stupid to leave her family and work for a meager salary. Ask maids which country in Asia pays as well as Spore for fresh or lousy maids. The truth is right there. You've eyes to open and see clearly so stop your one-sided irrelevance. Refusal to learn and show respect to us is obstinate ignorance and narcissistic.

    1. Everyone including idiots know how to complain... change policies or house rules for your sake... not happy, get lost lah! Stay in your own country and complain to your own govt what they failed to offer. Pester them to change for you, don't come and tell us spore govt owe you a decent life when your own govt are not even on par! Mad dogs go elsewhere to bark. Read this and stop behaving like we owe foreigners a great deal! The trouble maker expatriates, if you can't stop comparing your living standards vs ours, get lost too! You didn't contribute good things except making people fight. Greedy people should just pack and go. Use your fake compassion and kindness elsewhere. Cost of living is so high here that a single income family struggles to survive. This maid set aside $250 as spending money.

      HERE, she IS a domestic helper. But back home, she owns a farm, is boss to more than 10 people and is even a landlord. That’s because Miss Liza Padua, 49, had an eye for business and took courses to sharpen her skills.

      She is one of dozens of helpers taking business courses at Aidha, a micro business school with its campus at the United World College of South-east Asia at Dover.

      She saved $500 a month out of her $750 salary and invested in a rice farm in her hometown, half a hectare at a time. She eventually bought over the farm, which employs 18 farm hands, providing them with jobs and an income.

      If this maid can save 2/3 of her salary, why others can't?
      Paid $750 per month is unusual but maids these days aren't paid very low. It is common for experience filipino maids to earn at least $600 per month. They have their live-in expenses paid and what they draw each month totally belong to them. Maids do make a lot of money compared to what they could earn back home.

  26. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

  27. No foreigner would earn as much as what they get in Spore. If the pay is so miserable, which part of the brain is faulty that resulted FDW in a wrong move? Which Employer is so capable of getting a captive maid, forced her to leave her country and made her willing part with hefty overseas agency placement fee? If working conditions are intolerable, why come to Spore and not Malaysia, Saudi or other countries? Who is nuts? You? Maid?
    When you make insensitive and pig-headed remarks in Spore, think twice, are you really on the right track? Your Methodology works? Did you forget employers are human beings too but are not protected against errant maids? Bad maids get all the protection from our govt, what do we get? Nothing and a lot of pig-headed people like to add seasonings to make our lives miserable. Pungent flavours are annoying.

    Maids are not submissive slaves. They have a mind of their own and should be responsible for whatever decision they made, including flying to Spore and paying hefty agency placement fee. Treating a maid extremely well doesn’t necessarily make maid felt she is treated as a human being, become a thankful person and diligent worker. It will only make maids in Spore demand more and come up with lots of nonsense for unwilling to deliver their stipulated tasks. There are no exploitive FDW terms and all maids came on their freewill. Their greed led them to Spore. Their expectation for better life pushed them to seek overseas employment. FDWs can remain in own countries, who forced these poor women to leave their birth place and take up underpaid jobs? Maids are not gullible. You think maids are babies and needed you to spoon feed and clear the pebbles blocking in their ways?

    Technologies crafted the liberal and well informed women to work as FDWs. Obviously, maids know they will receive high returns. Maids are placed in a position to make choices to their best advantage. It is the activists, especially expatriates who are causing maids to become greedy, over complacent, resentful and take things for granted. They instilled maids with wrong thinking. They advocated the wrong things and enjoy seeing bloodshed fights. A country governed with pro-maid policies, how bad could it be?

  28. Plenty of people voiced the exploitation of maids by their employers and agencies; thus, rights of maids in Spore are heading unlimited soon. Maids' expectation are soaring high. The activists and maids' voices are mightier, fearless and able to garner strong support. Maids acted so poor thing.

    Singapore introduced a statutory weekly day off, campaigners claimed it is not being enforced because employers were given option to pay more in the form of no off day compensation. Employers paid more to have their maid's time yet being accused as cruel and inhuman. The sad thing is maids chose their employers and preference of off days. No maid was coerced to settle for anything not in their favour. Anybody with a clear mind won't take up job that aren't better paid than their home countries. Above expat activists trying to tell us, all the maids are of unsound mind?

    Migrants in Taiwan have been fighting for statutory weekly day off, without success. Hongkong, a dreamland for maids who have completed about 2 years of employment. The terms looked better than Sg but are maids contented? No, they want more, eg HK citizenship. Maids don't want to be second class citizens. When a product is overpriced, will you buy? If a maid cannot carry out a good job but asking for these and that, will she be wanted overseas? MOM and agencies claimed the Sg market determines the maid's supply and salary. If the maid's salary and live-in expenses is 30 to 40% of her employer's salary, will there be any need for FDW in Sg? The balance 60% for the couple and their children is insufficient. Women would rather stay home to take care of their children or elderly parents and spare themselves of nightmare maids, as well as unscrupulous agencies.

    Social media ensures pro-maid information spreads fast. Domestic workers are usually dependent on their mobile phones for communication with the outside world and friends. Their awareness of their rights no longer made them vulnerable or underpaid.

    Sg has policies in place to help maids. There's a strong Sg govt standing behind the maids, giving them the most favourable protection and care. Western journalists and activists have to realise that Taiwan/HongKong/Spore/Malaysia is not the same as their country. If you chose to destroy your eyesight, not interested to see what's happening, nobody can help you. Don't waste our time to read your hideous comments. Keep your fingers away from the keypad, deceive yourself and live your life as a blindfolded westerner.

    Sg employers are shameful or a disgrace? Shameful or disgrace for what ridiculous reasons? Shouldn't it be the maids' source countries such as Philippines and Indonesia, for running corrupt Governments and not being able to provide good jobs for their citizens? What maids get there are incomparable as Sg good life maids.

    1. Agree. To stop Expatriates from making our lives tougher, all westerners and their spouses cannot employ foreign domestic workers. If they must hire and make themselves the elite and most desirable employers, MOM should make them pay more maid levy and a tailor-made Certificate of Employing FDW. Westerners are using their outrageous to drain our pockets and soured relationships with our FDWs. Angmos or fake angmo thinking people intentionally created obstacles to limit our reach for happiness and inability to work in peace so as to sustain life in Spore. Westerners claimed we are cruel, what a shame on these people calling themselves good human beings. All employers holding work permits must be treated differently since they purposely wanted to act by saints or troublemakers. They must learn the hard way, adapt and understand the host country's way of life. Want to stay in Spore and earn easy money, no way! Don't make us looked like fools and bullies.

      People who are unable to mind their own business are most likely internally miserable. They seek to find faults (even if untrue) within others just to make themselves feel better and adore sitting on top of Asians. They tend to lead boring or unfulfilling lives and have no excitement or accomplishment in their own affairs, so they acted in loathsome manner. They seek to fill the gap in their lives by discussing the lives of others and judging them harshly so that these despicable ones can feel better about their own existences. These unhappy human beings targeting us to confirm their self-worth and resentment.

  29. Really sick of people thinking we or Spore owes foreigners a good living. They blamed Spore without feeling any bit of guilty. The country that issued your citizenship is fully responsible for you. Your country owes you a good living, a nice job and make you feel you're a happy human being.

    Foreigners, be it in the form of low class FDW/maid or high class expatriates, all came with the intention to earn more than what their home countries could offer. It means better pay package. It could mean quick bucks, a touch and go without any strings attached - cleaning their dirty backsides and conveniently leaving their trash in Spore. Overseas employment ie Spore signifies something for foreigners (be it maids or as an expat) to look forward to..... $$, glamour, ego, able to boast about overseas exposure, etc.

    If our terms are not juicy, why would anybody with a working brain come to Spore? 头脑有问题?有被虐倾向?
    They came to donate money to our country and people? Where?
    Feel that they could pollute our country?

    It is just like some foreigners littered our country or wasting our precious water supply. Some foreigners couldn't do it in their own country, felt deprived ... just like Sporeans can't buy chewing gum in Spore so would enjoy the sudden exposure and indulgence of gums. Some foreigners felt it is a common sight so they bought along their bad habits, irking culture, their norms to Spore .... thinking they are absolutely right!

    Foreigners have the rights to bully us and enact their norms on us? If we've not offered you attractive job opportunities, shouldn't you stay in your home country and rot there? Aren't you barking on the wrong tree?

    Who gave foreigners, especially the unlaudable westerners the liberty to condemn us? MOM is welcoming foreigners, regardless you are worth the cents, good or bad so our MOM/PAP should scrutinize undesirable people like you. Spore's good image will be tarnished by villains like you 唯恐天下不乱 不知恩图报 take things for granted, unappreciative and incitement of discontent.

    1. Singapore is becoming Sillypore. Foreign trash is everywhere. If they are good colleagues or good maids, i am fine to be PAP supporter. We are going to sink with this sort of people. Quite a lot of foreigners cant contribute well and are unworthy of holding jobs here. So citizens, do vote wisely if your dont want to lose your identity!

  30. Once Upon a LifetimeWednesday, 30 April, 2014

    I used to have a nice condo with a fabulous pool, don’t have to work and take full care of my children. It is a great life as an expat wife. How did I get to have this life, while someone else has to ship off to work as a maid? It is really by great fortune and luck.

    I was fortunate enough to be born in the United States, where even if you were born poor, you can get an education and change your life. In other parts of the world, eg Singapore, these doors aren’t open. Everybody has to work to have rice on the table and receive full education. As Americans, we aren’t familiar with the type of poverty experienced over here or elsewhere.

    Now that I am back in America, I missed those days with a helper. I loved the luxury of having a live in maid. Here it is an unobtainable luxury for most of us, though, because you can’t have a live in maid in the USA for $650 a month. That ship has sailed. Maids in the States are for the rich and famous.

    At home in the Philippines, my helper shared beds with siblings, dirt floor and cold water. I realized that the tiny room I offered, was a space she could call her own and never had a complaint that it was an uncomfortable closet. The salary she had was reasonable. It didn't turn out that being an expat maid she was paid way above the market rate and enjoyed home leave the same way as us. It was great that I didn't make myself so different from local employers and still enjoyed the luxury of a cheap helper.

  31. Readers to my blog
    You're highly encouraged to share my blog and views. The reason I have this blog is to vent my frustration as a special needs mum cum maid's employer. I may get good support but I do know most of the time, I receive negative comments, mainly because most FDWs' employer are viewed as baddies or abusers. As long as I'm wearing the hat of an Employer, not many people will stand at by side. On appearance, I looked like an Aggressor or Tormenter.

    Hope to get more people to know about special needs family trying to survive in Spore and staying employable (work full-time) by employing an expensive maid (FDW costs more than Sg low income earners, each month eat away about S$1500).

    I appreciate and grateful to whoever bothers to highlight and truly understands what I am going thru. It is not a joy nor fulfilment to be a FDW's employer. Since I have made this blog to be viewed publicly and allow comment posted using Anonymous, I know the consequences... being fired easily by self-righteous and persons filled with greed, selfish and/or resentment.

    Apparently, many people enjoy throwing stones at FDWs' employer, knowing no human being is perfect, meaning maids are not perfect, not vulnerable and are fully capable of giving me and others a miserable life. House rules or company polices are set aside to make the house or company work well. Nobody should challenge your company/boss if you really need that job. The grass is always greener outside so why stay in a job with full of complaints? As a maid or foreigner, you know you won't be penalised for breaking contracts and your employer can't make you pay for what you did, leaving them in the lurch .... all due to MOM's foreigner-friendly policies.

    Above 'alien thinking' expats or activists can post in many pro-maid websites and will surely gain lots of cheers for being awfully righteous and compassionate to maids. This is the only site not owned by any pro-maid person and a place for bullied employers to express their concerns and bad experience with FDWs/Agencies. Comments which are solely to add salt to my wound will be deleted.

  32. Hi,
    I am taking a neutral stance here. Coming from, I would say, a low-middle income family (combined household income of $5000 per mth), the costs of living in Sg is relatively high. After deducting CPF, utilities and food and children's school expenses. If the working mother choses to stay at home, the household income will become $3000. Why would the SG mother go to work then you ask? The maid costs $1500 and the mother's salary is only $2000. Because there will be a certain % of money (maybe $500) paid by the employer going into the Singaporean's CPF account that is very useful to be used to pay for our government housing. We are paying about $1000 per month as mortgage payment for public housing. Find me a country that charges so much for PUBLIC housing.

    I think expats mothers who stay at home and jolly well afford a live - in maid, are really living in the Garden of Eden here now. They will never understand the woes of a Singaporean full time working mother.

  33. And to expats' stay at home wives, I don't mean you don't have problems of your own, I mean it literally as you will not understand the local working mothers' predicament.

    Everyone has their own problems and you should not dictate your personal house rules to another household.

  34. I have been very cautious when I got a Filipino maid 6 months ago. Constantly checking her work and the utensils she washed. On hygiene, have reminded her multiple times and to date, we must check every utensil because there is still issues.

    On safety and security, she already freaked me out during the second month when she did not return home on time after she fetch my son. A 10 mins journey turns 30 mins and caused my mum to run around the neighbourhood searching. She pushed the blame to my 4 year old son, saying that he wanted to go to the mall. Everytime I raise an alarm on her misconduct, she mumbled and immediately find some faults of my kids to report. Like trying to direct my attention away from her.

    IP cams are installed at home. I increased the coverage overtime because she likes to hide at blind spot. She wrote many notes containing hatred towards employers and family. She complained she was bored. She complained that she is tired of working and is unwilling to come to Singapore to work as maid (but why still accept the job here, nobody can force her. Wasting my money to apply her over)

    Almost every negative attitude/ action/ disobedience that readers have shared here, she has displayed them so I shall not repeat.

    Extremely hypocrite, she portrays herself differently towards me and my other family members. She does not respect my mother and doze off in the day at work. When she was told by me on the errors she made, she will show a “black” face to my mum and kids when I left for work.

    Through my investigation on her sneaky actions, I detected 4 facebook accounts belonging to her.
    Some accounts are her real names, some are not. All accounts are flooded with her own raunchy selfies/ full body photos taken in her ex-employer home/ bathrooms.

    Fake information on Facebook – She studied in some university in Philippines, works in National University of Singapore (my house is not NUS) and in Hong Kong (which she never).

    She “cut out” her face and another Pinoy man’s face and “pasted” on a random photo of couple hugging so that it appeared she and the man was a couple. There are a few of such photos. That man is actually engaged to another woman.
    Her name is Marilyn Negraza Marzo, aged 34. Because I have cctv around the homes, I can catch her sneaky acts. She will do so during my bathtime, or in the middle of the night, thinking that I will not be watching. She even stared at the camera and continue her sneaky acts, but what’s the point of looking at the camera as if she can know if employer is watching.
    To the next person who hired her, I cannot imagine how atrocious she will be if you don’t have anybody/ any camera to monitor her.

    I wish everyone and myself better luck in employing the next DH. My lesson learnt as a first-timer, can't be nice and let the DH works freely, thinking that we treat them nice, they will do so the same. Respect them, they override employers.

  35. I truly agree with Winter. I am also an employer and I have a maid of 1 year, who is starting to show her true colours. Most employers respect their maids but giving them freedom to do whatever they want is not call respect, especially if the maid don't earn it. What your boss expect you to do is what we want from our maids. We are all equal - being paid to do our work! Our boss don't expect us to be on phone 24/7, skip work without reasons,. Yet our maid can do all these. Is this fair?

    I saw maid commented that they are made to work from 6am-10pm. Do you know that add up to 8 hours of sleep? And if they don't take care of baby at night, that is 8 hours of uninterrupted sleep! Hello, I as an employer, don't even enjoy this amount of luxury sleep. And before you maid complains, please look at how long you take to eat your meals, shower etc.... I believe that you are not doing hard labor from 6am-10pm.

    Before my maid come to my house, she worked in a rice farm. I believe that work in rice farm is definitely more physically demanding than my housework. She can complain that the job is dirty, toilet smelly, need a chair to sit down to iron clothes etc. I seriously think she is not suited to be a maid but be a princess.

    If I have a choice, I rather spend the money on my kids or go holiday rather than employing a princess in the house.

  36. I support Winter. I have a 7 yr old girl and 5 yr old girl. I do have parents or parents in law to help me. The first maid is not interested in cooking and housework and threatened me. The second transfer maid was very fierce and rude and swing my baby. The third transfer maid liked to lie and refused to feed my baby at night. The fourth maid liked to sleep during the day and at night and refused to take care of my children at night. The fifth maid set up a blog to look for boyfriends n changed her clothes in my toilet with door open. She wore sexy clothes. The sixth maid completed her 2 yr contract but lied to me that she wanted to set up a small business in her country. She returned in 2 months working for an expat. The seventh maid always go out when we were working. She brought my children to meet her friends secretly. She took our food and cooked for her friends without our permission. She was throwing her tantrums all the time and rude to us. The current maid cannot cook even after I employed my friends' maid to teach her for 2 whole months. Her cooking is so bad that I have to throw away the food. She herself dare not eat. She is not keen to play or talk to my children. She does things to irritate my girls and is always complaining about them. She cannot tell difference between duck and chicken and does not know what is a pear or mutton. One day, she didn't cook dinner for us. She said no more rice when I reached home. I went out to buy dinner for her and children. When I gave her her portion, she said she had eaten. I counseled her every month but to no avail. What can I do?

  37. MOM, cam you don't blacklist me for having 8 maids in 7 years? I stated the job scope, including night feeding of my babies, extra pay for no day off n handphone (I provide calling cards) and expectations/rules and regulations in black and white. All the maids were interviewed. They signed the contract willingly. But turn out, all of them are liars. The current one has been with me for 9months. 2 of my friends' maids stayed with her for 2 months(I paid their salaries) to teach her cooking. Yet, it is still not edible and no new dishes. Imagine having same breakfast-pork floss bread everyday for 2 weeks or curry fish, salted veg chicken every week. My girl has soup mee suah for lunch everyday for 6 months. Imagine she put 1 chicken knoss cube in 1 cup of water for one dish. For every stain in sink, toilet bowl, on sofa, floor, table or coffee table, I have to remind her 3 times before she cleans. When my girl throw tantrums, she also does that tit for tat and that upset my girl further and make her cry. Yesterday, my girl cried and screamed in pain. She said my maid washed her private part using water jet. When I questioned the maid, she denied it's her fault. Who can I complain to ? Can MOM understand our frustration?

    1. Thanks for dropping by to post what yr maid did.
      It is painful to be sprayed at the tender private part of a child, does MOM consider this as child abuse??? To me, is an abuse, a bully in the house. So sad to see such posting. Such bad maid cant be blacklisted because MOM doesnt believe without evidence eg video.
      Modern maids are of poor quality and tend to lie so changing again doesnt mean it will be better, how about childcare centre?

  38. I grew up in a relatively large size house and my parents had 5 maids at any given time. This experience taught me one thing, that is, to never have maids in my own home.

    Rather than employing maids and bringing to my home all of their nasty maid issues, I invest instead in intelligent electrical appliances, There are plenty of products on the market that minimise the time spent on housework such as irobot vacuum cleaner, electric pressure cooker, Tefal Actifry 2in1, food processor, Thermomix, good quality dishwasher, washing machine and a good dryer that are crease free hence minimising ironing on Tshirts and underwear etc.

    I also train my children from young age to pick up their own mess, work with them on how to tidy up, put away their clothes and teach them home organisational framework & skills. For example, My kids hang up their towels after shower, and wipe the sinks after they have brushed their teeth. My husband does the same. If everyone in the family does some daily housework ie. clean up and tidy up after their own mess before it becomes Mount Everest then it will take each person 30 mins daily at most in total to have the interior of the house to be always clean and tidy. it is usually 30 mins that many people waste anyway for doing useless unproductive things. Cleaning up their own mess and actively participating in the maintenance of their own home, teach my kids to be responsible for their own actions, be resourceful and motivate them to always search for a more efficient way of doing mundane tasks. Smart robotic technologies are there to help us so we can have better quality time.

    FYI: my daughter is now 14 and my son is 11. Doing some house work daily has not killed them at all. They are resourceful people, very fit and are all high achievers at school as well as in their extra curricular activities. We also live in a 380 sqm home which is always clean and tidy without any maids whatsoever. Most importantly, thank God for domestic products' technological advancement which makes it possible for us to avoid having nasty problems relating to maids.

  39. I need some feedback.
    I have a Myn maid for close to 1 year since I gave birth to a bby boy.
    Ok, she's not as bad as most employers had encountered. She does her housework. However, I felt she is not taking seriously what I said to her at times or being forgetful or what a "employee" should behave.

    Eg. She can put her half body and hands on my bed while talking to me.(coz im putting my bby to sleep.)
    Or when im scolding her for not doing things right or not taking care of bby correctly, she can smile back at me, acknowledging the mistakes.
    We had told her off many times about such matters but after a few days, her habits comes back again.
    (Could it be that she spends most of her times with me at home thus resulting this?)

    Its getting on my nerves. Hubby suggests to change maid. However, I felt it wasnt that bad.

    Anyone can give suggestions on how to deal with it?

    1. In my opinion, when maid gets over friendly and 'relax' eg putting her half her body on my bed is disturbing. Playing forgetful games is common, be it new or seasoned maid. Modern maids (all nationality) tend to behave weirdly because they felt they are humans, not low class slave and deserve some form of rights, best is equivalent to YOURS!

      Since Myanmar maids are 'well known' to have language barrier, did your instructions really get into her brain ... she fully understands? You told her off or smiling back doesn't mean maid acknowledged her mistakes, it could be an act to show she heard you talking to her but does she understand your message fully?

      Yes, employing Myanmar maid did get on some employers' nerve so will changing help? Another M maid could display the same pattern. Yes, I agree maids tend to get comfortable as time goes by and display a lot of unwanted habits. Nowadays, having a good helper is so hard.

      You can try interviewing transfer maids and ask 'tricky questions'. If she can answer well, not just 'yes' or 'no' then you do the same for your current maid. Compare & Experience their level of understanding and how other M maids appear in your eyes. If you intend to keep your current maid, try other ways to improve her understanding and behaviour. If really hopeless case, change.

  40. I am on Winter's side. My Indonesian maid who worked for 7-month requested to change employer as she wanted weekends off-day. She came clean that she saw how others waited in vain for job at agents place in Indonesia for 6-7month so she planned to get job with off-day after she secured one in SG 1st. She thought her plan would work after I gave her off on public holidays when she was less than a month in her new job with me. However she was repatriated at my agent's advice as my agent deemed her action as scheming & dishonest. After parting with more money, my Myanmar maid who worked for 4 months requested to terminate the contract as her mother needed her home. None of the above 2 maids have issues working with me. They chose to terminate the employment contract solely of personal reasons but at my expense. Maybe it's time that such contract should be affirmed.

  41. Need advice.
    Is it advisable to literally printout and go through black-white document of houserules and timetable with maid? Ie a fewpages of instructions for her?
    Also, how specific is specific? To the point where employer lists down steps on how / what to wash in a toilet, what to use, etc?

    1. To me, I have tried to be brief or even ask my Filipino maids to read herself, ended up she either doesn't understand or said read but didn't read.... felt too lengthy or she can't be bothered to get herself best fit ... become a good helper to me.... she adopts this is what I am, can accept I work for you, can't then send me back to agency.

      During interview, I roughly go thru important house rules, eg no mobile during the day. The first maid I had, I printed in English, sat in her agency and go thru in the presence of a nice and patient agent. Subsequentl ones, just wanted to earn my money and can't be bother to explain to maid.

      My advice is to be as specific as possible to avoid misunderstandings. Don't assume she knows. If too much, break, let her absorb and continue. Fresh maid may not know mopping the floor means how. A demo cum table table (time you took to do a task vs maid). Some fresh maid are really from kampong so you really need to have step 1 ..... end.

    2. thanks so much!
      will print out instructions and be concise and to the point. and go thru with her one by one.

      what about meals?
      she apparently has experience, but not sure how much.
      need to specify menu and recipe..show her how to cook? or let her manage meals since all eating togerhe?

    3. Since with experience, you can get her to cook what she knows or tell her what you want and find out about her cooking skills and whether suit your family. If she can manage cooking without supervision and you don't mind what she cooks, I would think it is good to give her free hand. I find it troublesome to keep telling FDW what to cook and how to cook.

  42. What is wrong with you?? Maids are there to help that does not mean you own them. They're helpers not slaves. I know that the Chinese tend to treat maids (anyone lower class than them) as low class citizens and deprive them of basic rights... Thanks for confirming this stereotype.

    And all that rubbish about not allowing maids to use the washing machine- technology exists for a reason. If you don't like clothes being mixed then she can wash her stuff separately no?

    I'm Indian american, I have family in India which manage several maids, not just one and Ive never heard of such nonsense.

    Please get it together and drop this employer-Nazi attitude.

    1. "I have family in India which manage several maids, not just one and I've never heard of such nonsense" (not allowing maid to use washing machine).

      On this washing machine issue, it makes sense for several maids to wash their clothes using washing machine because there are a few of them. Saves water and electricity if wash together and HIGHER EFFICIENCY.

      Having said that, I understand that most indian workers are quite happy washing clothes with their hands.
      The washing machine is usually for a 7kg load, so it won't make sense for ONE PERSON TO WASH A FEW PIECES OF CLOTHING IN A 7KG LOAD MACHINE. DUH !!!!!! The maid doesn't have many clothes so she will normally wash that one or two pieces plus underwear on an almost daily basis. For my maid, she is perfectly happy to wash that two/three pieces of favourites daily by hand. Refused to even put her clothes in the washer with ours.

      May I humbly suggest that you use a bit of brains and do a bit of math and background survey between your indian household and the singaporean household before you get up on your high horse to talk down to others. Being American doesn't give you the right to straightaway assume that every household and needs is the same and that the same rule should dictates. Tell tale sign of your arrogance, doesn't it?

    2. All because somebody din't allow their maid to use the washing machine, suddenly the issue becomes 'you employers think you own the maids', 'you treat them like slaves', 'you treat them as low class citizens', 'you deprive them of basic rights', All because the maids cannot use the washing machine.

      Now we really know who are the ones having the Nazi thoughts. Small things become very huge accusations - ok Maids, send your employers to the gas chambers because they treated you like slaves, deprive you of human rights, own you like animals, by not allowing you to use the washing machine....to the gas chambers, all you evil employers .....hail Hitler !

      Oh by the way, i worked in an American multinational company and we lowly employees are not allowed to use the executive lounge room meant for CEO and top management so do you think I should tell them that we Singaporeans are treated like slaves and are deprived of our basic human rights for not being allowed to use the executive lounge room to make our tea? The staff pantry is stocked with microwave ovens,TV and comfy sofas not good enough ....must rub shoulders with CEO and directors then we will "feel" at that at least we are humans..Right?

  43. I agree with winter....it is so hard to engage a good maid...nowadays maid r not as innocent as last time...they can be so scheming!!! Why we don't allow off days or hp?? We also wan to trust them provided they r trustable...sadly most r not trustable...if u r not going to b strict n clear in the first place, they will just climb all over ur head....n if they r unwilling to be maid, no one forces them to sign the contract....those stupid people who think we Ill treat our maids, wait till u really employ a problematic n shitty maid...see if u can still talk abt trust, treat them well shit...

  44. As an expat who enjoys much about Singapore I can say the helper/maid situation is most frustrating. I feel deeply for local families who must depend on these ladies and I worry about the safety of Singapores children. Even as an expat employer who provides a generous salary, very good working conditions (same food as us plus plenty of rest time) I have had one 1 in 3 ladies that was worth her salary. Why do I have a helper in my home? Because I have a husband that does serious amounts of long distance travel and no family to rely on in Singapore and small children and the purpose is to cover for the few times I have been sick. I managed just fine working full time using childcare with some support from my mom and mil previously. My first lady was great and I couldn't really at that stage understand a lot of the frustration about helpers.. My second helper I fired on day 18 due to serious safety issues (lost my 3 year old - lucky he wasn't injured). And the current helper is so lazy (I believe an addiction to facebook is the real issue) that we will be terminating her contract early and simply having a cleaning lady to help once a week. I think maybe Singapore needs to consider long day childcare as a real option going forwards and then you will have workers who genuinely want to work with small children and workers who are passionate about child safety and child welfare. I have lost track of the number of times I have had to rescue children because their care giver was talking on her phone(oh and that's never been a mum!). After 5 years in Singapore I can understand why some employers would remove their helpers phone because they want a situation where they can know their helper isn't distracted by their phone, sadly they aren't trying to mean or nasty they just want safety to come first. I look forward to not having an employee and the frustrations of someone who ignores a reasonable job scope (previous helper had no issues finishing it nor did my cleaning lady in 4 hours!) but current one cant seem to manage it (again its the constant need to be surfing on her phone that stops her completing her work). After so many years watching as a guest some of the things I have seen should have made my hair curl.

  45. I think that (personal opinion) you cannot treat them like your family when they first come. They need to know that they come here to work, not enjoy. If they shown to be appreciative, I am sure we will treat them well too. I think really hard to find responsible maid nowadays.

    It is good to lay ground rules when they first come, eg. must tie up hair (imagine her hair all over when feeding your kid), need to bath everyday (some first time maid dont do that everyday I heard). Also must make it clear that they need to take care baby at night.

    After being a year in my house and having off days, her behavior getting from bad to worse. E.g. she start putting her used clothes all over like this is her house. When I question why the used cotton wool not thrown and left at sink, she say it belong to my sister in law!!! (i employ her to clean my house, so what if my sis in law left there?)

    Rules are necessary especially using of handphones is forbidden during working hours must be emphasis. Say that they cannot carry their handphone with them and their family nd friends cannot call her during the day. Personally communication only allowed from 8-10pm example and after she finish her work!! And handphine cannot be left to charge over night!!

  46. If I have a maid I would never touch her mobile - it's her property. But if she uses it on the clock and work isn't done than I would warn her twice than just fire her - with the next informed over what the last was fired for.

    It is easier to be professional when you have an off day. I think it is inhumane and counter-productive to keep maids housebound. Just explain to them the negative lifelong consequences of falling in with a bad crowd and pregnancy - hell, I'll pay for birth control - the pill actually makes you calmer too.

    I would never treat a maid as less than an adult or expect less. Someone trouble from the start should be let go ASAP - letting them learn early is a kindness too.

  47. I'm caught in the middle. My neighbour complained about her Indonesian maid. "Very lazy, Give me black face if my kids or me ask her to go down to market to buy something. Don't want to help with cooking and mopping the kitchen when I bring her to my MIL." However, the maid had talked to me before. "Very tired. Ma'am asked me to go down to market to buy this and that. Just reached home the daughter asked me to go to food court to buy her lunch. Came back and Sir wants me to go down again to buy KFC and some smoke. When they bring me to Amah, I have too cook, sweep and mop kitchen. They say it's helping because Amah give us dinner. I'd rather stay home and finish my ironing, sweep and mop Ma'am house. When they come home Ma'am go to her facebook, the children to their ipads, Sir watch TV. I still have to do the unfinished chores and cannot use my phone because housework hasn't finished yet. But whose fault?"
    What do you suggest in this situation? Is this a miscommunication/mis-expectation?

    1. Hi! I have read yr post but debating whether I should reply. Comment is based on my one and only Indonesian maid + friends feedback ...click "All topic", read the topic on my Indonesian maid.

      Indo Maid may feel she is overworked, too much work for her handle (housework can't complete)... I felt it is due to most Indo are programmed to be slow workers and face problems to understand instructions. Due to this, my ex-Indo spent additional time to complete a simple task or a task she has been doing almost daily! about running errands/buy things, is that maid doing daily? She probably just want sympathy but how true is she overworked, we dont know.

  48. First and foremost, i sympathize with you having a special needs child.IT is already challenging raising a 'normal' child what more a child who needs extra attention.I have given up on maids. I hired too many including one who i was informed by a replacement from the same agency who went 'mad' in the indonesian agency and would drool and roll on the floor.The agent never informed me of her strange behaviour and it was my kids who told me that this particular maid would stare blankly at the wall while holding a knife.

    I informed the agent immediately that the maid was a little 'off' as she kept gorging herself with food including the kids Pediasure milk, my organic chocolate, using all my toiletries and eating the food i prepared as she said it tasted better than her cooking.(keep in mind, i bought her her own toiletries, jam, bread, biscuits, noodles,kaya) but she insisted on using her fingers to scoop out EVERYTHING i cooked for my husband... from pates to desserts.

    This was done within a span of ONE SHORT WEEK.

    she would also ignore my kids and cry every day for the slightest reason like when i told her to help me clean my window grill(without opening them so its safe) , you know what she said? She said the detergent is going to make her nails brittle so she would only clean it for 10 minutes.... i was fine with it but i realised sadly, the minute you show understanding of ANY SORT..... YOULL BE EATEN ALIVE.

    She got more demanding, stole more food, rummaged through my wardrobe, tried on all my shoes, and started flirting with my husband. All along, the agent whom i called for help was busy but i raised my voice and told them to take her back. The agent finally came when i told them about the knife incident and said,'She is new , let her adapt..."and kept convincing her that im a nice lady and that she wont be able to find another patient employer.I insisted they remove her from my house and they did so VERY RELUCTANTLY.

    imagine if i was working full time.... i may not even know what the heck was going on at home!!!So be very vigilant when hiring a maid and dont be too understanding to their nonsense.You will suffer for it.

    Big hugs to your little girl.Take care and be strong.

    1. Hi!
      This makes me wonder why MOM siding maid agencies and FDWs. Why allow maid agencies to earn easy money and need not compensate employers eg employed below type of FDW? Why till-date we don't get any protection from the claws of 'vulnerable and pathetic maids'?

      Being a FDW-employer is something I dread but do I have a choice? To stay employable, have my own income instead of being looked down when requesting for VWO's limited subsidy .... for those who aren't that understanding like above poster, haven't been bitten by FDWs or are blinded activists, which would you choose if you are in my shoes? You won't think that far nor feel the pinch if life have been too kind to you!

    2. This is scary. Your maid sounds like she is mentally ill. This is dangerous. Singapore has allowed a mentally ill person to work in Singapore taking care of kids. A mentally ill person no matter what she has done, cannot be held responsible for her actions in the court of law. Alert MOM and tell them that their checks are ineffective.

  49. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

  50. Greetings to all worthy Employers and Mistresses,
    I am really ashamed and want to apologize before all respected Owners and Mistresses on behalf of all helpers & servants. Shame to the complaining servants in this blog who do not understand their position and duty and cause troubles to worthy Owners. I am a domestic servant in Pakistan and I must say that servants in Hong Kong and Singapore are paid 10 times higher than we are paid here. I earn $70-80 in Pakistan on monthly basis. i work 16 to 18 hours daily and always available to the needs of my Owners in nights as well. I clean toilets daily, polishing shoes, cleaning, dusting, car washing, kitchen help, shopping, taking kids to school, handling infants and other duties.
    I am doing all this because I am a servant and its duty to fulfill orders of my Owners. I have accepted my duty and now being servant, will of my owners should be the purpose of my living. Regarding Owners behavior, I must say that we servants live at their premises so we must never complain about their terms and ways. My Mistress abuses me most of time, its natural for Owners to become angry over servants silly mistakes, so I properly apologize before my Mistress and most of the time receive punishment as well. But I never forgets in apologizing and receiving punishment that it was caused as a result of my behavior, mistake or fault. So I fear my Mistress and never tries to commit mistake again so in the end its for my betterment and benefit. If I will be fit and obedient, she will refer me to somebody else for service as well.
    So, servant should be like a servant and Owner should an Owner, this difference assure proper delivery of duties and its for our (servants) benefits. We are not equal to our Owners and must know our place.
    I beg to know from Owners here that is cleaning shoes on daily basis should be duty of a servant. Just asking an opinion from worthy Mistresses here, I do this on daily basis. infact most of time I am in my Owners shoes cleaning and polishing.
    Once again my apologies to all worthy Mistresses who have been suffered by their servants but we are not all same.
    Kind response from worthy Mistresses is appreciable for this servant.

    1. Dear DSP (domestic servant in Pakistan), may I humbly suggest that you immediately resign from your current post as general slave and shoe cleaner and apply for a job that pays you 20 times higher than what you are currently receiving. A position in MOM, perhaps in the "servant well-being and happiness" department in MOM would be ideal for a person of your calibre and I'm sure it would suit you to a tee. You will have the power to ban shoe cleaning and write warning letters to owners and mistresses via email, given your fluent writing (except for a few grammar mistakes which I do not think anyone would notice). Alternatively you can turn to tutoring your owner's children in English and this will immediately see an improvement in your pay and working conditions. You will be paid according to the skills you command and according to your ability to value add to your owner's household and of course according to market rate.

      I hope you are pleased with my humble response to your queries.

    2. Well, I am really happy to know that loyal, honest and hardworking helpers still exists in the world. So, we should keep the search on. I also have very bad experiences with domestic helpers/servants and I consider them as dodgy, cheat, lazy, lair and dishonest.
      What the mistress of servant in Pakistan is doing is absolutely right and you MUST ALWAYS OBEY WHAT IS BEING INSTRUCTED BY YOUR EMPLOYER/MISTRESS.
      Well, I think the foolish servant must apologize to all of us for posting in a wrong blog. CANT YOU SEE ITS EMPLOYER'S BLOG NOT SERVANTS???
      I hope others will also agree with my comments.


    1. You posted without using brains and be realistic
      Don't you know you are not allowed to smoke or drink in offices?
      Don't you know some companies do not allow using of smart phones or basic phone?
      Not happy don't WORK!
      Not happy get your ass out of Spore!

    2. My blog/forum aims to gather all FDWs' news scattered everywhere, become a one-stop site for mentally & financially bullied FDWs' employer to beware and learn.

      FDW's Employers are most welcome to post here. There are plenty of websites and forums that are pro-maid and welcome commenter like you.
      Behave like a sensible human! Don't tell people something that is impractical! You're making yourself like a clown here!

    3. I do not blame you for not knowing what it is like having other jobs because possibly you have never known any other work except a maid’s job. It is the same for ALL kinds of work in singapore. It is NORMAL to work 12 hours per day without overtime pay. It is normal to even work midnight shift and still come to work the next day. An employee CANNOT go to work late, (even 10 mins is late), the employee cannot take one day’s leave without applying for permission 7 days in advance, cannot go out of the office during office hours without prior approval, you cannot lie that you are sick, you must see doctor and show your medical cert, you CANNOT play computer/handphone games at work, you cannot chit chat with friends in the office during office hours when there are work to be done, cannot go on facebook, cannot write on blogs like this during work hours, cannot talk on the mobile phone all day long, cannot miss deadlines, cannot lag behind work schedules, non compliance with company rules and regulation and non delivery of work requirements is an offence, watching videos on handphones and stealing company's stationery and arguing with employer/boss/managers are considered bad behaviours, definitely NO SMOKING AND DRINKING during work hours etc...ALL THESE ARE CONSIDERED BAD WORK ETHICS AND WILL ATTRACT A WARNING LETTER AND GET YOU SACKED FROM WORK.
      All the things that NO professional people can do in Singapore, a MAID does them at home again and again.
      You said a maid is NOT A SERVANT. Then WHAT DO YOU THINK IS A ‘SERVANT’? Do you mean that being called a ‘servant’ is an insult? Aren’t we all SERVANTS? People who work in Civil Service are called Civil Servants. They have special names and titles but STILL SERVANTS. SERVANT means a person who performs duties for others, a devoted, helpful follower. Haven’t you heard of the phrase “Jesus was a great servant of mankind”. "I am among you as one who serves" (Luke 22:27).
      A leader is a servant of the people ! .
      It is VERY WRONG OF PEOPLE LIKE YOU to have a NEGATIVE MINDSET and think that jobs that serve others are looked down upon. It might surprise you, but there are millions of jobs, none of which are maids, in which the employees can honestly say they are treated like dirt. Yet they don’t go around blaming other people for their lack lustre jobs.
      You may say that a maid is mistreated in Singapore, You may think that a maid is being treated as an inferior in Singapore BUT IT IS NOT RIGHT to say that a maid is treated like an animal in Singapore. Making sweeping statements like this reflects you as a narrow-minded, resentful person who just want to find fault with others and blame others for all the ills you think your countrymen suffered.

      Seriously, in their own countries, the current people who worked in Singapore as Maids cannot even find a job to feed themselves, let alone being able to support their families financially.
      Singapore has given them this opportunity to lead a better life for themselves and their families. The money they earn here is so much that in 2 to 4 years ONLY they can build a home, send kids to universities, etc..We Singaporeans have to slog life long to buy a miserable flat.

      Yet, instead of being grateful for the opportunities in Singapore, people like you can only gripe and whine and complain endlessly. Dissatisfied with your blessings.

      Let me tell you this. Singaporeans CAN DO WITHOUT MAIDS. We are a resilient people. We will not tolerate such views from people we have helped.

    4. Since these people are so dissatisfied and kept demanding more and more, I really think it is time we STOP EMPLOYING FDWs. We should start finding our own solutions and help ourselves rather than depending on foreigners who will never ever be satisfied with what they have. Give one inch, ask for a yard. Give a yard, ask for a mile. Give a mile, they will soon ask for the moon. Bottomless pit.

  52. hi employers

    i am providing maid for u , theyare is experience in singapore before . i am not an agency . the processing is using direct hire system without any agency involve of it . if u are ok please whatsapp me at leninatalia22@yahoo.com.
    u dont have to be worry to lossing your money because there agreement for them that they will pay all your expenses to employ her if they break contract before 1 year.

    willing to hear from u soon

  53. Singapore Employers please beware of getting maids directly from agents overseas!

    The Contracts that maids signed and endorsed by MOM were as good as toilet paper, completely no power to bind the maids to the contracts each time they decide to break. No consequences for them. What makes us think that any agreement we signed with them will be binding?

    If licensed agents here in Singapore can get away with our money, each time a maid decides to break contract and go home, what makes us think that signing any agreement with a lone supplier operating from overseas will help to protect us better? It is as good as getting goods online. Any spoilage or damage will be up to the supplier's integrity. No protection or coverage.

  54. The last FDW LIES. Chats up men on internet.Despite telling her the phone cannot be used close to the care receipient because of NFC interfering with the ICD implant, she continued to do so. Even asked me to get doctors and nurses from the hospital to meetwith her to discuss when I said they saw her using the phone. During her time with us she kicked my injured ankles daily despite me moving away from her and warning her not to step on them. She also hit my head with the fridge door that I had to go to A n E for treatment.
    I ask her many times to tie the shoelaces of her running shoes. On the day she tripped on them I had reminded her twice. She blamed my puppy when she fell. My mum who has muscular dystropy had to wheel her around the hospital to go to the A n E to get treatment. In the end the maid took cab everywhere for two weeks. Using our money of course. After that she didnt tie her shoelaces again. You know what she said? Today I will not fall down.
    I trained her everyday for 8 months because she said she was willing to learn. She claims she has never swept floors before. Even though she has trained at the agency. I broke down in tears one day. She promised she wont lie. But she brought my cat to get kidney treatment and left without seeing the nurse because she waited too long. She was late to the clinic cos she was still chatting on the phone. She told me a certain nurse did the treatment for the cat. But the clinic had called when they found the maid missing. Only when I told her the clinic said the nurse was on leave she confessed she left but insisted she was there. If I hadnt known my cats kidneys would start failing because it would have been another week before she needs to go again.
    My place is so small. only do housework with NO Cooking. She cant do marketing either ao we have food and groceries delivered. When she wanted to leave I sent her home. She claims she misses her father. But I have repeatedly asked her to use our phone to call home she refuses.
    We didnt know about her phone but she managed to get two. There was no house rule about using phone but why lie? Towards the end another Myanmar maid told us the guys she was interested were not quite into her based on the chat messages. On the day she was leaving I showed her that her hometown was flooded and is a UN declared disaster area. She just said she was going to Yangon where her sister is. If she missed her father wont she be concerned that her hometown is submerged?
    Many people whomhave met her said its good riddance shes leaving. She walked out of my house without a word of thanks or goodbye. The next day after she left my cockatiel sang. He had not sung in 8 months. I felt so relieved. Many a time I told myself I had to be a better employer more patient etc. But this is what I got. There were other maids I trained.
    My grandmas Indo maid after 8 days had a headache. She became unresponsive. Mum called an ambulance and attendants and later AnE docs and ward docs saidnnothig wrong with her. She claims she.missed her.mother. During the 8 days with grandma she swept floor twice. Because grandma stayed with us temporarily ournown maid did housework.
    I have lived a nightmare of almost 3 years with maids who either run and meet friends despite house rules....and dont want day off because they want money but run off to leave care receipients unattended to meet boyfriends and friends. Ex Filipina I paid allowances and bonuses on top of salary of $550. She did that. Brought loads of clothes and electronics from men she befriended.
    Tell me how to be a better employer?

    And to the expats who live here and work here, I also adapt to the cultures and rules in western countries. There they treat you with respect only if you are 'like' them. They dont adapt to my way or culture because mine may be alien to them.
    I switched agency now. Hopefully I have better luck with the FDW as we all still recovering from injuries. The FDW was interviewed via Skype by me twice. I have a good feeling. I hope God will take pity on me. Finally.
    For the past

  55. Do without Maids. Why let yourself suffer and be bullied?

  56. If u need help around the house because you physically cannot do those things you need someone right? i highly doubt anyone would just hire a maid if they are physically able.

  57. Ask yourself this. If you are not privileged as you are now, and have no choice but work as a maid, how would you like to be treated?

    Have employment requirement is one thing, giving inhumane treatment is another. If anything, you choose her as your maid and decided to pay her, at least be obligated as a responsible employer to treat her well.

    How do you know if your maid does not do all these just because she resented you but she have no choice but to work for money?

    She needs to suffer the consequences if she did wrong, but otherwise is she being treated as a human being? Or she is just there to fulfill your needs, and all her needs are unimportant? As much as she works for you, she is also a human and deserve to be treated as one. Don't forget that you come from a much more privilege country than hers. It's mainly birth lottery that you are able to earn a comfortable living, but have you thought about how she have to abandon her family and probably her daughter back at her country to take care of yours?

    This blog is just sad. It's sad how badly and how prejudicial a human being can treat another. I mean, you can always do without a maid, as many people less privilege than you do. But you choose to hire one, so do so responsibly. Research shows again and again that productivity and happiness do not arise from constant pressure and scolding from a demanding boss. If you want your FDW to perform and do fantastic job, you have to think of how not to overwork and overstress her. Perhaps you will ask, why should I do that? It's like a job training. If she doesn't feel motivated enough to serve you, she will never perform well in her job.

    1. "This blog is just sad. It's sad how badly and how prejudicial a human being can treat another. I mean, you can always do without a maid, as many people less privilege than you do"

      You have a choice not to be a a low class maid or unfairly treated human being, you choose the job, not employers tied you to a job. You are smart, certainly not stupid and unable to compare and find your dream job. You people just want to sponge on others. If any company giving you a proper job/employment has no rights to set rules and regulations, what makes you? Superior human being? Asshole?

      You want a job, agree to that company's policies... same for our house. Who gave you the rights to demand and expect rosy life? It's your choice, nobody forced you to work as maid, unprivileged is not our fault, blame your country or your parents. Can't behave and accept the employment terms, stay in source country, tell your govt to pamper you or wait for money to rain on you!

      Afraid of overwork and over stress, are you a princess?
      Maids = comfortable lives at the expense of employers? Pay you to enjoy life? You think we're nuts? Your comment showed you didn't read the MOM policies- unfair FDW policies forced onto employers. This site doesn't welcome righteous sicko like you, obviously you didn't open your eyes to read before posting here.

  58. Why are you always harping on the point that maids are not treated right, not treated like human beings etc etc..

    Please wake up. If you are not treated right, ask for transfer. We don't like the job at the office, we don't like the boss, ask for transfer. This is for the genuine cases.

    Unfortunately, there are also maids who are treated fairly but cashed in on this "I'm being bullied' sentiment and started to take advantage of the situation, knowing full well that MOM and NGOs will support them. We are talking about these people. There are DISHONEST MAIDS, BAD ATTITUDE MAIDS, LAZY MAIDS, HOPELESS MAIDS just as there are also BAD EMPLOYERS. Yet they expect their employers to give in to their demands, give in to their childishness, give in to their lazy and negligent attitudes.

    Wake up. NOT ALL MAIDS who come into Singapore are ANGELS and NOT ALL of them are seriously in need of a job to survive. They took advantage of people and situations. They are humans from all sorts of background. You may be good and honest. But the same cannot be said of ALL OF your country people.

  59. Working in the office requires us singaporeans to work long hours without rest without stop round the clock. It is common to work from 8am to 8pm or maybe even longer. we don't earn 'big money'. If we value the salary and job, we got to kowtow to the rules and see the boss' face. We don't keep making demands and complain to MOM or anything like that. Can't take it anymore then look for another job.

    On the other hand, if maids are earning SGD450, it is already 9 times more than what they earn back home. If they can survive on SGD50 back home, then 9 times of that would enable them to save and buy a house eventually. When I was in vietnam, a graduate in linguistics or computer science earns less than a maid in singapore. The graduates have to work at two jobs to earn SGD500 equivalent of what a maid earns averagely in singapore. Yet they can already live comfortably like this.

    An average maid is more often than not, treated fairly in singapore. Perhaps not the Princess treatment but still fairly. Full meals 3x a day, salary, sleep 7 to 8 hours, a private room of her own, (maybe small but still a room), restaurant once in a while and maybe a trip or two, frequent rest time during the day (nobody tells her to work like a robot non-stop from day to night)...what more to ask?

    yet still, many complain and complain. Don't like this, don't like that, employer don't smile at me, employer rude to me, employer don't allow this, don't allow that, make me do this and that I don't like, etcc etcc...

    If maids are whiners and complainers, Please just do ONE THING. Don't say singaporean employers treat you people like slaves or non humans. We just treat you like WHINERS and we cannot stand your attitudes. NOBODY OWES YOU A LIVING. JUST GET THAT STRAIGHT.

  60. "I mean, you can always do without a maid, as many people less privilege than you do. But you choose to hire one, so do so responsibly."

    You are right. Thanks for your advice. All Singaporeans should do without maids like I do. I have the financial ability to hire two maids but I chose to do without a maid. I see them as problematic. It isn't about the work anymore. Maids give so much non work related problems nowadays that it simply isn't worth it to pay somebody to come to your house to create all these problems for you.

    It is much better to suffer without help then to pay SGD450 to SGD650 to suffer with help. Hey Singaporeans, when you suffer, no one is on your side. Just remember that.

  61. Employers suffer but those ungrateful maids just can't seem to stop and count their blessings. If life is so good in their country, stay there don't come here and complain or accuse employers of not treating them like human beings. These itchy backsides, only know how to demand better benefits but their work performance get more and more lousy. Their behaviour and heart like eaten by devil.

    Source countries kept threatening to stop their people from working as maids, say say but no action. Why? Because Spore is still better than their own country. Good salary, good protection by our govt and plenty of men for them to soothe their loneliness. Get into trouble, don't worry, fire won't be on them but their unlucky employers.

  62. 不要故意动歪脑筋, 努力工作, 少怨别人, 试着感恩惜福
    混不下就打包回家, 何必为难雇主
    人在做天在看, 居心不良 邪恶 功于心计伤害他人迟早有报应
    做人别太过分, 不论你是女佣或雇主

  63. Greediness knows no boundaries. Source countries, maids, recruiters all want to squeeze as much as possible from employers. NGOs, countries said employers don't pay enough, work from morning till night no rest to pay off loans. Everytime employers pay more, the loan period increases now from 5 months to 6 months to 7 months to 8 months. Money goes to recruiters from home countries and to their own government who are greedy for take a cut from their own country women. So maids get more and more unhappy not with their own government and recruiters but with singaporean employers. Only point fingers at employers. So give employers plenty of problems to show that they are not happy with singaporean employers.

  64. So do without maids. We are feeding very greedy people who just want to squeeze and squeeze from singaporeans and we don't get any work done properly. I am disillusioned with the FDW industry.

    Filled with greedy agents recruiters and governments. Loser is us. Do without maids better.

  65. Can we use this portal to list all those maids who behaved bad with their employers. This will avoid people hiring the same maid and suffer. I am searching for some blog where we can tell our experiences.

    1. MOM doesn't allow employers to post details of FDW eg work permit number, name or photo. They want to protect FDWs, they tend to believe most maids have a good reason to become bad. Bad, can't perform/lazy are determined by employers, not police. MOM and activists don't want any portal to make maids unemployable, they felt unfair to FDWs. These people felt it is alright to make employers suffer, pay & pay and no venue to air our grievances.

      Before I created this blog, there was another blog managed by Tamarind who was pressured ... she allowed posting of bad maids but had to remove her blog to please maid protectors.

    2. Thanks a lot for the reply. It's really bad and pathetic situations we go through with these so called "helpers". How much ever we try to facilitate its less for them. Brought Indian helper spending lot of money from a village in India and from the 1st month itself she showed her attitude and made us go through a lot of hassle. Theft gold and money from the house. Still there is no means to publish the information to help others not to hire the same maid and suffer.

    3. You can help by:
      1. Make police report
      2. Report to MOM and request for ban on the maid
      3. Be a referee on MOM's data base. everytime someone wants to employ your maid, you can give your side of the story.

    4. MOM only blacklist maids. Those without police record or FDWs deemed fit to be reemploy ie marketable, due to unreported theft, lies, underperform, loose women, etc most prospective employers wont get a chance to hear from existing employer how bad these 'helpers' are. The truth wont be uncovered due to protection by MOM and errant agencies. If there is maid loan, employers had to silence otherwise maid cant be transferred out by agt.

    5. If MOM can blacklist maids, it is good enough. If due to unreported theft etc.. FDW get to be remployed, then report them !!

      If FDWs are underperforming, wayward, lazy, compulsive liars or they just have bad attitude etc.. which do not fall under criminal records therefore don't have police record, then employers can join MOM's employers' referee database, so employers can give reference of their bad FDW to future employers so they can be warned.

      If there is maid loan, why employers have to remain silent? If FDW is bad, return to the agent and report anyway - can report police, report lah. Can report MOM then report lah. Ger free replacement what.......

      The only thing to be said of employers is whether they will take the trouble to report....Most of the employers dun bother to....just return maids to agency and wash hands. NO wonder FDWs are taking advantage. If no one is willing to do their part to improve things, then situation cannot improve lah.....

      Winter has set up this blog for sharing and I believe she has done her part by gathering evidences and information and writing to MOM, but one person cannot do much. To change things, it needs the 'weight' of everyone's inputs/feedback/ complaints etc...

      Otherwise, it would seemed as if only a handful of singapore employers are experiencing issues and MOM would waved the problem aside and assumed that these employers are troublesome people who would always find fault with others.

  66. Have been following the comments here. I have made the big mistake of treating my new maid too well. Free access to hp, gets to nap, gets to eat whatever she wants, ended up caught her lying and stealing, confronted her, she pretended that won't happen again, then ran off to HOME because she knows they will shelter her despite all her lies and bad behaviours. Now I really detest these activists who just blindly jump on the side of bad maids without knowing the facts. So we filed a police report and let maid know it's not a shortcut to get her ticket home on a whim and fancy.

  67. Your posts are good and so informative.

    PR Agency in Singapore

  68. Your post containing house rules are like you are from the medival age and your thinking is so stinking as if you are out there to hire a slave. Only difference is for slave they pay before and here you want to pay every month.
    Your story is so much of one sideded who canot see and understand that what you canot do without a maid's help, that it is your necessity to take help of 2 more hands to make yiur life better and that it is not a not luxury which you can do without that you are hiring a human being not a machine to work for you, that she is going to take care of all of you at home includi g your food so that you can go out and earn more and enjoy night out with your family and go to disco with your wife that call yiur guests to home without even bothering about the hardship of making dinner for them(ask yiur wife how tiring it is), that she is going to give your house a beautiful look and when you come back from office by setting and clearing cyour daily mess. Are these no value to you or are their values equal to your maid salary only.

    Your only argument to this is they are paid. Yes, tbey are paid. Yes..who will work for yiu frre. I am not disputing about how adequte or not their salary because they have agreed to it. But, see you want them to work for seven days 6.30 am to 10pm everyday, 15 to 16 hours a day and remain mentally ready to attend to your any need at any time within 24 hours of the day. You have problem in their off day even if it is once a week. You donot want them to use their phone during working houreans they will use it at midnight duri g sleep ( I certainly donot see any reson why they canot use if they use itt duuring off peak work). You want them to work them 7 days a week and yiu expect them to be happy with tbeir job. Which job demands such a high working hour and high discipline except this DW. You want to pay tbem only one day salary for their off day. SIC mentality. Are yoy thinking that you are hiring a machine or a human being. How many hours you work in your office and how many off days you have in your job per year. How much hours of work per day make you tierd. Why you go out every sunday with your family. Are you a normal person and the maid is super human and has come from other planet. You must have a human heart to understand the physical tierdness and mental sadness of other people who are leaving everything behind in their country to serve you. You must understand that keeping maid is not a luxury for you, it is your compulsion. You owe a responsibiliyy to look after her so that you can get best out of her. Because you are paying you can change her if you are unhappy but if she is not happy and change job you blame her. SIC mentality.
    HOME is not a shelter to give shelter to criminal. It is a place to rehabilitate and a place to listen to the physical or mental torture or may be just to hear the plights of a maid and rehabilitate her to you or to other. But your heart is not a gentleman's one. Without MOM's rightful intervention the plights of maid would be even more. Thanks to MOM and HOME because of whom "some strict house rules employers" are in check from doing injustice a worker who is allways on duty 24 hours 7 days.

    My above comment is not for the good employers who treat their maid as one of their family member. There are thousands out good employer there for whom the maids are working for 10, 20 or even more years. GOD bless you for not only giving bread to your maid but for seving her extended family back home.

    Having said above, maids who violates MOM rule and torture the family for whom they have come to work should be rightfully punished as per Govt laws.

    1. By posting here, you made yourself looked like a clown, showed how brainless and naive you are to take stand for modern FDWs ... forgot about source countries & agents.

      First of all, there's no paid slave. Would anybody fly all the way to be slave? Second, what's listed in a contract, you adhere. If can't carry out like a responsible human, don't work and then claimed you've been abused or treated unfairly. You own your own brain and legs, nobody forced you or FDW to board the plane and work in a place that is less favourable than home country.

      You want to play angel, this blog is obviously not for fake saint like you!
      Your ending words may sound like you're not one sided but your opening made you evil at heart and unrealistic/unsympathetic.

    2. Blessing in DisguiseThursday, 25 February, 2016

      Maids know their rights in our country more than we do. You ppl fond to put unnecessary weight on employers despite the effort and money we actually spent. Most of the time, u ppl see face value and not in depth. U really should do soul searching. Maids tend to forget if they make employers happy, do their job well, don't skive, don't lie to get a job, count their blessings and not expect to be treated like breakables, most employers can do their best to make them happy. There are black sheep employers and black sheep maids. Being a maid doesn't mean she can err, cheat and then cry foul play. I have done what is required by law and more than what I shld be doing but did maid show appreciation and deliver a better job? Ungrateful maids are common yet you turned a deaf ear and shut your eyes. Many sad vicious cycles went on for years with the help of blinded ppl like u. Employers are not mean nor unreasonable to expect quality returns from their paid to live-in helpers. Talking crap is free. Did u feel great to air in this blog?

    3. be strict they say we too fussy, abuse them. when we treat them good to avoid stress and let them be comfortable working with the employers they step over our head when do mistakes fdw will act blur, employer tried to control anger as much as we can to avoid situation even worst because we need them to take care of our house or loved ones.but fdw took advantage of our weakness am i right to say that????

  69. We changed our first 2 maids, within a short time as both are not suitable. First one cannot communicate in English at all (though in her resume, she said she could). Both "can't cook" & we quickly realized we have to plan for their meals everyday,(either buying for them or cooking for them) which is seriously defeating the purpose of having a maid in the first place. My advice; if in the resume they 'claim' they can't cook, forget about it. The second maid talks on her phone even when she's vacuuming the floor, I'm not kidding. She has her h/p in her pocket the whole day.
    When we sent these 2 maids back, the MOM quickly sent us a letter to warn us! I cant believe it, they did not even check what could be the problem. Are we suppose to pay them & 'suffer' in silence until contract is up?

    My final & third maid is much better. She could cook for herself even when we are out. I don't have to worry about her meals. Also she gets back her phone after 7pm everyday.

  70. Thank you for this post, I have spent a lot of spare time reading your content.

  71. there are certain maid that can make employer scars for a life time and they got away with it.


  73. Maids are not stupid. They know how to bluff, and get away with things

  74. Winter has done a great job setting up this blog for all Singaporean employers. Well done and keep up the good work!
    I also wish to comfort you about your special needs child and I feel very sorry that the many negative comments simply ignored this fact which is why you really need a maid.

    I also have a whole long list of house rules for my Indonesian maid when she first started working for me. She also needs to hand wash her own clothes and even her bedsheets. She is not allowed to use her mobile phone when she is working. However she can use it at night when she sleeps at 9:30pm.

    She has been working for me for almost 10 years now. She has never complained about my house rules. In fact, she takes the house rules very seriously even to this day. She is always respectful, honest, cheerful and very hardworking. Once she was stuck in Indonesia and could not return because of some document issues. She almost cried when she called me. I flew to her home town with the documents and brought her home personally. My maid is not stupid. She earns a good salary from me, and her entire extended family in Indonesia depends on her salary for everything from renovation to weddings. She knows that she will never be able to earn this salary if she remains in Indonesia.

    I don't know why angmohs (expatriates from North America/Europe) feel that hand washing clothes are so cruel. Both my mother and mother-in-law handwashed all their clothes and bedsheets until they were over 55 years old. I still handwash some of my own clothes now because the label says handwash is required.

    I know many people don't understand why maids are not allowed to use the washing machine for their own clothes. The reason is because the washing machine collects a lot of gunk over time. I have tried many times to get rid of this gunk before and it never seems to be cleaned completely. What if maids throw their dirty underwear and the dirt gets collected as gunk? The dirt will be left in the washing machine forever.

    Even doctors don't use mobile phones when they are attending to patients. How many times have you seen maids talking on their phones while taking care of young kids?

    My maid told me that she would rather not work for angmohs. She said that some of her friends complained that their angmoh employers overworked them and were extremely fussy. So she does not think highly of angmohs.

    Angmohs and other foreigners should really stop posting negative comments because you are very ignorant of our society. Almost all of our mothers and grandmothers lived a life without washing machines, dryers, vacuum cleaners, dishwashers, mobile phones etc. Women from Indonesia and other poor countries still do not have those luxuries. I guess you could never imagine a life like that. However to the maid, not being allowed to use washing machine and mobile phones is really not a big issue, if the maid truly wants to earn money to support her family.

    1. Thanks for your comments.
      It is really true FDWs are pampered. Hand washing is still happening in modern homes. Just like using hand cloth to mop the floor instead of a mop.... I did that when I was still a maiden... does that mean my mum didn't treat me like a human?

      Activists & a lot of western Expats are really a pain in the neck. They think too highly about themselves and villains here.

  75. House rules are important, and it's a must-do for me. By doing this, you're setting the right expectations with your domestic helper or maid. There's nothing wrong in starting your journey together on the right foot.

  76. I recommended Best House Keeper Singapore http://www.besthousekeeper.sg/ as one of the best house maid agency here in Singapore.

  77. This si absolutley disgusting how can you treat a helper like this "waste your electricty" this is shameful i wonder what you use your electricty for?
    you should rethink your methods for your helper and not make them like your caring for a bloody dog.

    1. also maybe rather than complaining that your helper does not wash your child right then you should do it your self this is just laughable

    2. Posting here as an activist, you've declared u are BLIND AND EVIL.

    3. Commenter chose to be oblivious of what's happening in Spore and what maids are doing to employers or deliberately hurting vulnerables yet most FDWs able to get away scot-free or given extremely light sentences.

      May your God punish you for acting selfish, insolent and inconsiderate to others. Stamped as FDW's employer is pathetic, no matter how good you are or have acted in accordance with law. There's nothing wrong in having house rules, which equals to company's policies.

      Human rights shouldn't be your tool. You came come here to work on your own decision. You're answerable for all bad decisions made, not your employers. You want to find fault, maid agents should be the one. May your God punish you for indiscriminately hurting us.

  78. Thank you for sharing this. It's so helpful to me. This is one article but gives a lot of informations. Once again, Thank you.

  79. My maid constantly steals. It has reached a point that she does not even fear that it will be found out anymore. She just denies and shouts at me. I cannot even keep things in my house anymore. I hv to move my huge collection of vintage perfumes and dvds to my friend's house for safekeeping. Bottles of wine and whisky went missing. And many other stuff. She sends them back in a humongous parcel to the philippines. Can the authorities pls ban this cheap parcel service to the philippines? They are robbing us blind and countless loot hv been sent out this way. When i threaten to report her, she threatens back that she will report me for abuse. She is really sly and conniving and has no qualms lying through her teeth. Do the authorities protect us from such maids? When u talk to her, she does not even look at u or answer u. When u chide her for not cleaning the house well (thick layer of dust) she will slam cabinets... slam crockery and shout back at u. She has been with us 10 yrs. I hv been reluctant to change the maid because of the additional hassle and cost and hving to teach new maid to care for my mother. The maid goes out whenever she likes and she can disappear from 9am to 6pm on weekdays. My mom does not even get any water to drink during that time. She apparently makes extra income working as a part time cleaner outside. She is too lazy to bring my mom to the toilet and just put diapers on her 24 hrs. Happy to be able to vent my frustration here. Frankly, if not for my disabled mother, i would not want any stranger living in my house. I also wonder if i shd bite the bullet and change the maid. And hope the next one will be less of a nightmare.

    1. Yr fdw is horrible! Closing 2 eyes still can't pretend she is ok nor lie to yourself to keep her and carry on living under the same roof.
      Your mum can talk and move in wheel chair? If yes, fire the maid. U are unlike me, having a non verbal child who is a forever big baby. We faced the same worries of going the hassle and no-guarantee good next maid for our loved ones. I'm also tolerating my FDW.

      Install cctv n hidden cameras, get proof and send her to jail.

    2. Advance Placement Scheme, facilitated by the Ministry of Manpower (MOM). The programme is open to employers who are hiring a foreign domestic worker to care for a child, elderly person, or person with disability living at the same registered address as them.

    3. I posted above abt my horrible maid who was stealing non stop for 10 yrs. I hv fired herabt a yr ago. Best thibg i ever did. Shd hv fired her long ago. New maid from Myanmar. Not meticulous in her work... no initiative... BUT at least she does not steal. The rest i can tolerate.. but not stealing. Will try to keep her as long as possible!!

  80. We want to terminate the employment of our maid. But she does not want to go. She can be aggressive and has threatened to retaliate. How do we send her back without getting ourselves killed or falsely accused?

    1. Report to police? Once work permit terminated, she becomes illegal to stay... deported.
      Read in other forums, some maid agencies escort maid to airport at a cost, check with yr agent.

  81. I'm horror-stuck by how irresponsible your maids have been towards your special needs child, however, on reading this post, I think you keep attracting greedy and childish employees might have to do with the fact that you are a stingy and rigid employer. Quality doesn't always attract quality because there are always The Farmer and The Viper scenario, but quality is required to retain quality - your first maid was clearly the best one.

    I'm a responsible and hard-working person and I will never work for someone like you. You have terrible employees because the better ones went to the better bosses.

    Letting your maid use the washing machine will benefit her more than it will hurt you, #13 has no doubt scared away many quality maids, because an indicator of your stingyness.

    My first regular employment as a young girl was helper of a small flower shop. Every employee is suppose to get an uninterrupted 30 minute lunch break every 5 hours - this NEVER happens because we were a small shop - and I was okay with it because my boss made up for that in other ways! THIS IS KEY - whenever you have aboveboard expectations whether it be in regards to regulations or market condition (that there are foreigners paying for two maids to barely do nothing with their own rooms), you have to make up for it. BAD: lunch is short and interrupted on delivery days. GOOD: I get to bring home flowers that are being rotated out. BAD: I have to eat at the counter during busy days. GOOD: Boss is buying lunch!

    I get paid to stay 30 minutes pass store's closing to clean up, and my boss regularly lets me off a bit early if I work quick so I can catch the bus without waiting another 30 minutes. Because of this I always start around 5 to 15 minutes before my paid time when I arrive early. There was no CCTV at our small shop because everybody was grown-up, no one is a child, no one is treated like a child.

    I feel a lot of sympathy for your child, and by extension you, because it is stressful, but much like how a rich jerk attract golddiggers that don't love him, controlling, over-demanding employers attract childish employees who are only there because they have no better option. Why you hire FDW? You NEED FDW to care for your daughter, everything else can take a back seat as long as she's cared for, the food is healthy, and the house is clean. Everything doesn't have to be done to your exacting standards, it's your house, but it's her almost 24/7 workplace and sleepplace and your standards will limit who you get, will exclude better candidates than what you have now. Look for an older FDW who is done with fun, whose kids are already grown, and eat her food and tolerate different ways as long as your kid is cared for, your house is in order, so you could focus on making money for your retirement and for your daughter's increasing care. Right now, you have all these house rules, but they are getting broken anyways. Expecting different results for the same actions is a definition of insanity.

    Or...especially at this point, you have a history of conflict with FDW, which is going to come up when you are in interview with a good FDW who have options, a good FDW who intends to honour the full terms of her contract so she wouldn't even risk signing on with you, you might have to look into working from home. I don't know what the laws regarding the operation of a home daycare in Singapore is, but you might want to look into that. Where I am, a woman can operate a daycare containing up to 5 kids without a license, and some stay-at-home moms use that as an income.

    Good luck. I want you to know that I do get that your maids are terrible, unforgivably so – it’s just, the only thing you can truly change is yourself. The one who gave your daughter bruises should be in jail. I believe in duty of care – kids get my full attention when I babysit, I don’t play with phone (it helps that I don’t even waste time with social media).

    - Lilac Lily, Toronto, Canada

    1. You posted "I think you keep attracting greedy and childish employees might have to do with the fact that you are a stingy and rigid employer. Quality doesn't always attract quality because there are always The Farmer and The Viper scenario, but quality is required to retain quality - your first maid was clearly the best one.

      I'm a responsible and hard-working person and I will never work for someone like you. You have terrible employees because the better ones went to the better bosses"

      "Where I am, a woman can operate a daycare containing up to 5 kids without a license, and some stay-at-home moms use that as an income."
      SO UNLAWFUL and dare to tell others to use your method!!

      Conclusion... you're mentally unsound to say my first maid, a person seeking male was the best. Appeared you just like to hammer employer, don't care about individual country's employment guidelines/norm and is obviously an evil & blinded person. Can't be bothered to read your story but leaving it here for others to see how ugly you're!

  82. Sharing my bad maid story: I'm a Canadian from Hong Kong. My grandmother from my father's side chose to stay in HK because that's were her friends were. When she became frail, my uncled hired for her an Indonesian maid - said maid took advantage of how old she was, neglected her, and stole! Ivory is rightfully illegal now, but we have this pair of chopsticks made in the time of grandfather with his name engraved on it, and she stole that, and so many! What was unforgivable was that she didn't make sure that my grandmother was properly fed and took her medication on time, it's heartless! When strangers leave me their kids in the mall for "Just one moment", I keep an eye on them. When I see seniors climbing stairs with groceries, I help. It is the nature of civility to care for those who need care - especially when it's your duty, when it's what you've been charged with!\

    Who wears make-up and perfume when caring for kids in someone else's home? Who are you even wearing it for? As for dating on off days, what quality of men could you possibly attract when you are a live-in maid? Better to save money save money, educate yourself whenever you can, and date at your contract's end!

    The cellphone one is common sense. When I get a call at night when I'm on the street, I don't answer it till I'm inside a store or back home - I don't want to get mugged while I'm distracted. I am also extremely happy with my 'dumbphone' - I only have to charge it once a week, it survived my butter fingers drop one flight of stairs down, and lets me limit my recreational email checking to once a day, so my friends have learned by now not to email me the latest fake news (actually, they keep that on their facebook which doesn't bother me, as I don't have a facebook, ha!) All my rec internets is done on my laptop which I leave at home when I go for a jog, when I go to work, when I go enjoy life.

    The three meals one sound rigid, but she gets her own lunch, and if she wants to eat something else, why not buy with her own money.

    My biggest contention remains handwashing, what's with Chinese people and that? The electricity requires negotiation, show her the bill if it's really that much. The man who didn't give the key to his maid set her up to leave his home unlocked. Unlike regular employment, a maid is at her place of work much longer, 'sneak out'? Seriously? If you don't give your maid a key, you encourage her to leave your place unlocked and she could still invite men back to your place. There are older women responsible enough not to invite people up or to get pregnant on the street, but again, those women would not work for an employer who keeps her like a prisoner at home.

    I had two bosses when I worked for a family business one summer...ne ver figured out if they were husband-wife or father-daughter or brother-sister and was never tactless enough to ask, but I've always felt more comfortable having the female boss as my point-of-contact - because I'm woman!

    Seriously, you need to hire an OLDER FDW, younger girls have hormone, not only does this make them stupid, but hormones in the air affect men such as your husband as well. An older FDW would come pre-train, so she will have her own ways of doing things which you must tolerate, but it's a lesser evil than a young one who needs so much training, ignore training anyways! ...and when you give people more leeway on how to do their work, they get to own it and take PRIDE in their work, have better work ethic.

    - Lilac Lily, Toronto, Canada

  83. From the very first time I have talked to my maid, upon her application, I have made it clear about my house rules and she certainly agreed upon it. Its important to know your maid well and to orient him/her in everything. I am hiring my maids via Maidfinder and so far, I am getting wonderful people.

  84. We Employ a Myanmar Helper ,im surprise shes a drinker always asking a beer from my husband at night , though i always tell my husband not too do so coz by right she have no right to demand anything from us. Am i right? Its not our problem to provide her that. Is there anyone here who have these kind of Helper? Some what like a spoiled brat. 2 times she walked out during her working hours just because she cannot fix the plants. But still we gave her a chance because we feel pitty on her .We have no kids at home i can say her job is much more easier for her , me & my husband who always cook our food she just help us to prepare everything. When it comes to cleaning shes not that good, she neglected some other things we have instructed to her. Is there any have the same Helper as this??? I dont like her attitude either. Im just really patient.

    1. I'm surprised. In my view, I would think a part-time helper is more suitable since both of you are working and have no elderly or kids to "keep FDW fully occupied" and stay away from beer.

  85. I am not an activist and I have met my fair share of maids who were mentally unstable, feigning illness, pregnant, fought with me, stole things, bad to kids, bad to grandparents... BUT... I must say that employers should still maintain a positive mindset and not put all of them down because of a few errant ones. Heard of law of attraction? You get what you think of. Put yourself in their shoes. If you were sold this wonderful career and you made the choice to fly abroad, leave your family behind, and not even given the freedom or personal space for some rest every night, wouldn't that drive you crazy? Why do you think some maids runaway or go crazy? So please, don't say stuff like it is their choice and under the law we are not renting them the space etc. Some things it's just about humanity. A fellow human being, who is a daughter, mother, sister to other people in another country, left her family for hopes of a better life. Even if we are not rich enough to provide them with a lot, just be human and treat them like human.

  86. Most of the people on here seem to view your helpers as cattle. I'm amused by your directions at the bottom of this page "Don't pollute this blog with your pro-maid, insensible and selfish comments!" PRO-MAID?! Give me a break. How about you try to be PRO-HUMAN BEING?! You're a bunch of entitled spoiled bigots with no pity for those with less opportunities than you had.


This blog is not meant for screw-lose activists or loans. My blog aims to gather all FDWs' news scattered everywhere, become a one-stop site for mentally & financially bullied FDWs' employer to beware and learn. Don't pollute this blog with your pro-maid, insensible and selfish comments! Activists posting here are BLIND IDIOTS, IRRITATING freaks and deliberately showing no RESPECT for others... robbing our only breathing space.

Note: only a member of this blog may post a comment.