7 Jul 2013

What Maids did? Part 2

You are most welcome to post and help to populate.

As long as you're not trying to attack me or
add salt to my wound, your posting will remain in this blog. 
If you've an unsuitable FDW to warn others, feel free to post her details here.
We try to help one another because MOM has no intention to be fair to Employers.  FDWs who are poisoned by activists/trouble-makers, played us out or act stubborn and untrainable should not
be given any chance to work in Spore. 

Content page - All topics
Special Needs.2
Who earns lesser than FDWs?

Filipina Maid is employer's bed Mate, Straits Times, 7 Jul 2013
The Filipina had all the right papers - a valid passport and a permit to work in Singapore as a foreign maid.  But when enforcement officers from the Ministry of Manpower (MOM) entered the home where she was working, they discovered that she shared a bed with her male employer.

The couple's photographs were around the flat, and their undergarments were hung together to dry in their bedroom.  These red flags indicated that she was no maid, MOM officers told The Sunday Times. After four hours of questioning, the man confessed that the Filipina was his live-in girlfriend, not his maid.

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Maid kicks 4-year-old boy and warns him not to tell parents, STOMP, 7 Jul
A young boy sustained a deep cut in his mouth when he fell down after his maid apparently kicked him on the back.  The incident came to light when the boy's childcare teacher noticed the injury and informed his parents.

A four-year-old boy was abused by a maid inside a lift on July 5. The maid was bringing the boy to school and kicked him from the back and threatened him not to tell his parents and grandma.  The boy's childcare teacher found out about the injury and informed the parents.

The boy cried and told his teacher and principal that he was being abused by the maid.  The fall left a deep cut on the boy's mouth so the parents decided to make a police report.   This maid had been caught smoking and stealing money previously, but the employers decided to give her a chance.   However, this chance resulted in a bad injury for their son.  The police are still investigating the case.

Winter: Will such maid be put in jail or be canned?  Will such maid suffer monetary losses?  NO!  Such good life and well protected FDW will be sent home at her employer's cost.  If it's the opposite, the employer will be jailed and/or fined and her/his name will be published so that self-righteous people have chance to stone him/her... including shaming her/his family, giving them a tougher life.  His/her & family's reputation will be tarnished!

MOM created all theses problems and loopholes.  Till now, MOM didn't feel they are doing anything wrong so no solution offered, policies remained so no tweaking done.  Till now, many still don't believe FDWs are the most fortunate human beings working in Spore.  All live-in costs (daily meal, accommodation, insurance, transport, etc) were paid by employers, received take home pay of at least S$400 per month which is so much higher than any of our low income workers.  Our low income citizens worked harder than the maids, some worked under the hot sun, some had to soak their hands in soapy water for almost the whole day, some are washing smelly toilets .... but govt didn't want to help them using more effective ways.  Govt did a lot of lip service but how many eventually had a take home pay of S$400 per month?  Ask our govt to show you the real fact and stop hiding the truth.  I was once a low income household so I know to have S$200 per month (after deducting all the BASIC live-in costs, NO insurance/car/branded stuff etc purchased because unaffordable) is a dream!

There are bad employers, I didn't deny this but I am more inclined to believe there are more bad maids than bad employers.  Just because self righteous people & media liked to bad mouth or publicize bad employers, tend to feel maids looked more like victims, it doesn't mean there are more bad employers in Spore.  It is the same theory why MOM acted on 10 maids who fell from high floor, doing window cleaning or bamboo laundry.  HDB flats were built in Spore for more than 30 years, how many locals fell doing cleaning or laundry?  Nobody cares.  The ratio of locals who fell are definitely higher but did our govt/HDB care?  See this truth yourself, foreigners' lives and well-being are more important than citizens' lives.

The definition of bad maid refers to any FDW who cannot deliver a proper FDW job (based on interview or job description).  Gave many chances and Counseling still didn't work so Employer has no choice but to part with her/his money and find replacement for that bad maid.   A bad maid is a person who is lazy, chit-chat on her mobile & didn't do her daily chores/duties, stubborn, behaved too princess (pampered),  uncooperative, poor attitude, drama queen, abusive/bullied person in her care, dishonest, steals, slept with man/men, violated her work permit conditions, moonlighted, indecent (doesn't wear bra or underwear, wore low cut/revealing clothes to seduce her male employer), untrainable (do not listen to work instructions and carry out duties as per employer's training), unhygienic, played forgetful games, doesn't remember safety rules (eg jaywalking), bad temper, rude/impolite, showed no basic respect to her employer(s), having mental problem, runaway, bad mouthing her employer(s) and/or irresponsible.

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In Spore, FDW's Work Permit number will be the same as long as she's the same person, didn't change name or use fake passport.
ROSELYN DELA CRUZ LUY. Phil, Work Permit: 025442970
JESSICA ALAURIN PANGILINAN. Phil, Work Permit: 026396379
Such maids do not deserve sympathy or second chance because they do not respect themselves.  Made themselves looked so dirty and unsuitable for employment.  No integrity or dignity.  If maids felt what they did were right, employers should feel free (no need to feel guilty) to tel their husbands/parents in source countries to inform them their beloved wives/sisters/daughters have been repatriated home due to them sleeping around or ogling men.   Give them a warm welome home!

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Winter - how come this maid can run away for so long?  What happened to her unfortunate employer?  Was the $5000 security bond eaten by our hungry MOM?  Obviously not employer's fault, employer can't control a maid's mind so when he/she hired a bad maid, who stepped in to help? 

A maid helped her boyfriend to bring drugs into the country, was jailed on Monday for four years. Listiyanti Ayu Astuti, 26, was carrying 3.88g of heroin in a slingbag when the couple were arrested on June 27 last year in Eunos Crescent.

A district court heard that the Indonesian maid arrived in Singapore in August 2010. She ran away from her employers in March 2012 to stay with Mohamed Murad Hassan, 39, a Singaporean.  The couple would rent rooms in various parts of Singapore. She saw him consuming heroin and also watched him pack the drugs in plastic bags and straws and sell these at a void deck at Circuit Road.

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Winter - some people can eventually go maidless, wish I can too!
To train my girl to be independant and know how to take care of herself .... tough but we're trying to train her on ADL!  If cheap therapies are offered regularly or special needs schools are meant to provide continuous learning, maybe 5 -10 years later I can see my girl feeding herself with a spoon or sign to me that she needs to go toilet, point to me which part of her body is in pain, know how to use toilet and shower facilities, can dress & clean herself ....

There are things that your maid did to you which made you realised you can actually manage life without a live-in maid.  Life can be rosier without FDW.  You, a normal family definitely have a choice compared to me.

Getting on without a maid, The Straits Times, Apr 2013
When my sister walked into my home one recent Friday evening, she saw a mess of toys, clothes and newspapers strewn around my living room and remarked to me: "You must have been very busy at work this week".  She was right - the mess in my home has a direct correlation with my workload for the week ever since we decided to do without a maid.

It has been a year since my helper of two years left and we decided not to get another, for various reasons including wanting the kids to be more self-reliant.  While I would like to say that Jason, seven, and Shannon, three, are now able helpers around the home, the truth is that this goal is still a work-in-progress.

There have been countless times when I have stared at the pile of dirty dishes or dusty floor and thought how nice it would be if we still had a maid (or if I could just wave a wand to make the mess disappear). There have also been times when I have felt guilty telling the kids I have to cook dinner or do the dishes when they want my attention.

In the last 12 months, my husband and I have thought about whether we would be better off hiring a maid again, but our decision is still "no". Even though it is a work-in-progress to get the kids to help around the home, they are now more independent and willing to help compared to a year ago.

Paring down their toys and implementing some simple rules have helped: One toy or game out for each child at a time, and it should be kept before they move on to the next toy or game. The fact that I work from home makes it possible to juggle work, cooking dinner and fetching the kids - with an emphasis on "juggle".

Some weeks I think I have a handle on it all when interviews are easily completed and children are happy in school. But there are times when newsmakers are elusive, kids catch the flu and are home with the bug, and then everything falls apart.  I'm still persevering - with some success - to cook dinner four days a week. Not wanting to waste time standing over the stove, the slow cooker is now my best friend.

While lunch hours when I was working in the office would mean an enjoyable hour or so catching up with colleagues, I now prepare dinners in 20 minutes during lunch - chopping vegetables and meat to throw into the slow cooker so that we would have something to eat by dinner time.

Last year, when I wrote about going without a maid, some mothers whose kids are older than mine wrote in to share their experiences - these have kept me going in the last 12 months.  One said she never regretted her decision to stop hiring a helper because her teenagers can now whip up a simple dinner when she is busy. Another said her primary school-going boys place their water bottles in the sink after school and apologise if they spill something, because they know Mummy would have to clean up. Yet others shared one-pot meal recipes.

For me, I celebrate little successes. When Jason requests his favourite long beans fried rice for dinner, he offers to chop the long beans for me. That may not sound like a big deal, but it is music to the ears of a working mum with no maid.

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The maid had been working for the family for just a day.  Within that very short period, Indonesian Yuliana abused the four-month-old boy under her care so badly that the infant almost died.  The 23-year-old maid, who has two children, was caught on closed-circuit television hurling the boy into the air several times and onto the floor.

The incident was discovered on Friday by the boy's mother, Ms Nina Suraya Sulaiman, 24, who watched the recording.  She was having breakfast at a nearby restaurant at about 9am during the incident.

Ms Nina Suraya said she saw the baby being hurled into the air and thrown on the floor by the maid.  She rushed home and took the baby to the Tengku Ampuan Afzan Hospital.

Maid gets 20 years' jail.  The maid was arrested on the same day after her husband lodged a police report.  Yuliana was charged with attempted murder as well as abusing the child.

Ms Nina Suraya said she took her son, Mohamed Hareez Mohd Zamri, back to the hospital at about 8.30pm on Sunday after noticing that the baby was not moving like he normally did, even when sleeping. "I tried to wake him up, thinking that he was sleeping, but there was no reaction," she said on Monday.

She said the hospital had examined her son, but the results are yet to be known.  Meanwhile, Judge Mohd Azhar Othman said during sentencing that the offence was very serious and had a huge impact on the victim's family and on society.

"Your action has resulted in society being afraid and not having peace of mind when leaving their children with their maids. 
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For those employers who have treated their FDWs too well, in the extend of pampering them in the name of upholding human rights or simply to show others your wealth, I hope below is YOUR maid!  This will make you wake up, being nice will not be appreciated by FDWs.  Don’t spoil the FDW and make commoner's lives difficult!  Don’t make FDWs think they are not required to deliver a proper FDW’s jobscope and acts such as below, is how other employers should allow maids to do. 

1) The water tank maid, read
Ruliyawati was described as petite and attractive.
Her family's financial problems forced her to come to Singapore, leaving behind her child.

Both migrant workers met just a month after she started work here in August last year.  It was almost a near-daily routine for Ruliyawati to go to the minimart for newspapers or canned food for her employers while her man and his friends would buy groceries or newspapers from the minimart in the evening.

They can be seen chatting at the void deck of Block 686B, or having a heated argument.  The couple often quarreled at the void deck and in secluded stairwells at the block, and these tiffs revolved around Ruliyawati's family.

But a stormy relationship ended for good when the Bangladeshi cleaner placed the Indonesian maid's body in one of eight HDB rooftop water tanks.

2) Winter: I have copied below
Where I got these?  Did I make these up?  
So what you found out where I've copied from and these are the truth, will this kind of maids frightened you, make you think thrice before treating them too well, offer them more leeway to be bad or stop attacking Employers?  In my blog, there are many other annoying and irresponsible things that Domestic Helpers did.  Some were reported in the news but did the news and comments awake your real social senses?


I had once came across newspaper article, reminding these domestic helpers, not to take up the whole area of available spot at mosques while waiting for their employers' kids in kindergartens.  That shows their big presence.

Once, a six-year old came up to Me, saying he was absent from class the day before because his father suddenly wanted to return home.

Upon opening the front door, the maid was asked to put on her clothing in her room, while the Bangladeshi man, who was then doing the painting job at his block, remained at the hall.
The boy claimed he could see the Bangladeshi's legs.

My friend had a hard time telling her maid not to feed her baby, of all places, at the bus-stop.  My friend was not too sure what the maid was up to but given her nature...

Some employers always want to be different from the rest.  They often felt sorry for their maids' living condition back home.
Thus, they wanted to provide the best for their employee.

But it is not few employers that their trust were betrayed, their sympathy exploited.  Especially when these maids who are able to leave the employers' house as and when they want, are provided with handphones and they are unable to self control of using it.

The phone is a great distraction.
And even without off days, these maids can still managed to get boyfriends.

A brother had no other choice except to get a helper when his wife met an accident.  The helper's main duty was to look after their six children, especially the youngest, who was less than two years old then.

The helper, married with children, claimed did not know how to cook despite being married with children in Indonesia and in her late 30s.  The brother cooked whatever he could for his family.

But there was once, when he was in a hurry to go to work, that he just put aside the ingredients for the helper to fry rice.  He did not believe his wife when told that the garlic and onion used was not peeled off the skin...

Luckily he believed his own eyes and ears when at his in-laws' place, the maid went downstairs to make a phone call to his wife's younger brother, wanting to know the young man better...

3) Source: Stomp - May 2011
The domestic worker apparently brought a wheelchair-bound woman in her care to her date with her boyfriend. STOMPer is furious that they started getting intimate, right in front of the elderly woman.

The STOMPer described:
"A maid was spotted 'romancing' a foreign worker behind Kembangan MRT station on May 2 at 6pm while a wheelchair-bound elderly helplessly looked on.  The maid was so heartless and disrespectful that she couldn't care less about her elderly employer who kept looking away while the maid had a jolly time with her lover. “

"Shortly, the maid turned the wheelchair around and left the pitiful employer guessing what was going on behind.  Such behaviour is absolutely appalling and I really feel for the aged employer who was unwillingly made to sit through such torture, unable to react to it and voice out.”

4) An employer received an anonymous letter stating that her stay-in housemaid was having a few amorous affairs.  The letter exposed that the maid brought a Bangladeshi man home, or she had been frequenting hotel with him.

After thorough investigations, it turned out that the letter was in fact sent by her own good friend.  Her own best friend betrayed her, for her own goodness sake.

The letter reminded the said employer of the time, last year, when her maid requested for a time-off to accompany her this friend buying a birthday present at Serangoon for another friend.
Since the maid had finished her work, she was allowed three-hours to spend her time with this maid friend.

When pressed to speak the truth, the maid admitted that she had lied.  She had actually checked into a hotel with a Bangladeshi worker.

It was not her first time. 
She also brought the Bangladeshi boyfriend into her employer's house when they were not at home.  The Bangladeshi worker was not her only boyfriend.  Everyday, she was allowed to bring her employer's toddler to the playground.  She used the opportunity to get to know men and offer herself as their girlfriend.

The maid believed, since she had told the truth, she will be returned a favour of her request to let her continue staying in Singapore.

One of her boyfriends who is rich, is willing to foot the levy payment for employing a domestic worker.

But the employer told the maid off.  She was totally disgusted of her shameless behaviour, praying she will not be able to return to Singapore and bring more unhappiness to other families.
She was returned to Indonesia.

But checking with her maid friends here, she is not afraid of being repatriated home, as she can easily find many other employers here in Singapore.

5) Source: Stomp
STOMPer was shocked to see his neighbour's maid sitting under the block and chatting with her boyfriend for hours on a handphone after her employer had left for work.

The STOMPer warns employers to track their maids' activities while they are at work as they might be idling away. He says:  "These pictures were taken near the void deck of Block 23, Bishan St 22.

"One morning I went down to eat breakfast.  It was about 8.30am and my neighbour had gone to work.  To my surprise, I saw her maid sitting on a bench near the car park, chatting away on her mobile phone.  When I returned from the coffee shop after an hour, she was still sitting on the bench and chatting non-stop to her boyfriend.”

"Perhaps she was forbidden to use the home phone and therefore she had to use her own phone and talk to her friend outside the home.  Some employers can be very harsh towards their maids and hence when the boss is away, the maid will go off frolicking.  It may be more prudent for employers to install some CCTVs to track the activities of the maid when they go to work."

6) An acquaintance's Indonesian maid was given once a month off day, just like her friends from her home village.

But there was once, she was requested not to take or to postpone her off day, as it was the first day of Hari Raya. Better for her celebrating the festival with the family and usually, she will receive packets of monies from relatives.

But the maid, in her 30s, with children back home, insisted as she had planned a picnic at Sentosa.  If all her friends can have their off days, why not her?

But all her friends were working for Chinese families.

7) A just arrived maid is given her off day in her first week of work.  She goes out looking for friends... to do fishing too!

Big groups of migrant workers, men and women gathering at shopping centres on weekends, the government must really think of the social impact and its consequences. 

Just walk down Peninsula Plaza in North Bridge Road, a favourite spot for Myanmar, Lucky Plaza in Orchard Road for Filipinos, the Little Thailand Golden Mile Complex at Beach Road, Katong Shopping Centre at Mountbatten Road for Chinese national and City Plaza at Geylang. 

All these foreign workers just know where is the best spot to spend in Singapore beside working place. They are new in Spore, yet they know.

8) I was once asked by a Batam friend to find her niece living in Lampung, on the southern tip of Sumatra that borders Bengkulu, who had worked in Singapore for four years.   She called her mother staying in their village, informing her she worked in Bukit Merah.

My Batam friend believed her niece was being abused and tortured as that was the only upon arrival call she ever made.  She insisted since we are the best of friends, I will sure 'save' her niece by knocking at every doors at all the blocks of flats in Bukit Merah.

I fetched her from Batam to go to Bukit Merah on one Sunday.  We went to a playground.  She was taken for an initial shock seeing all maids with handphones gathering together while waiting for children at play.

A number of them were with fast texting fingers and some with ear pieces.  She went to them asking for her niece but nobody ever heard her name before.  She asked them if was possible for her to find her niece in one of the households.

One of them said, she must be out of her mind - Walking a block of flat is like walking around a whole village in Indonesia.  She was asked to count how many blocks were, just in front of her...

We then took a taxi to City Plaza, a hotspot for Indonesians.  I requested the driver to drive slowly and to make double turning around the shopping centre.

City Plaza was like a shopping centre in Jakarta to my friend.  These mostly domestic helpers, supposed to be simple-minded, many were all dolled-up, with make-up, and many were with revealing clothing with jewellery.

She realised, these Indonesians are not up to innocently nothing with their what she think of them, being simple- minded.  They were transformers.  They went all out for their elaborate physical transformation.

Most sit on the steps or grass patches outside the mall to chat or having a picnic with their friends and male Bangladeshi construction workers.  She was told, male workers from Indonesia, Myanmar and Sabah frequent the place too.

Their public behaviour awed my Batam friend and left her speechless.  

The seeing is believing, been there, seen up close of not all maids in Singapore are facing overwork or ill-treatment as what's printed in papers. 

She knew now, being housemaids in Singapore is not about working 24/7.  She knew now, maids have had their own lifestyle to maintain. She get to know of married maids having relationship with Bangladeshi workers.  She get to know maids from her own country having affairs with multiple partners who could support them, providing them cash, topping-up their phonecards...

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Copied this from a blogger.  It was dated Oct 2012.

My second maid from Myanmar is a godsend and has been, for the past one year. She started off not knowing English and what to do around children. She also vacuumed the soles of our shoes, washed two of my Tempur pillows (and subsequently made them totally unusable) and brought bedbugs into our house. But she’s got great attitude and such a tremendous sense of keenness and initiative.  She also takes pride in her work and has a spirit of excellence. She learned how to cook and take care of the baby from the confinement nanny after Nat was born. Because she cooks well, we look forward to going home for  home-cooked food everyday.

Unfortunately, she is also going home. I brought her to see an ENT specialist for the pain in her ear but the problem didn’t go away; in fact it’s worsened and gotten so bad this girl is getting dizzy and woozy. I’ve brought her for reviews, sought a second opinion from another ENT specialist, and even taken her for TCM treatment. No one knows what’s wrong.

The Ear, Nose and Throat Consultant whom I paid $95.01 to consult did a series of Specialised Investigations (it says that in my bill) called Pure Tone Audiometry and Tympanometry, two Clinic Procedures called Clearance Ear (Simple) and Syringing and a Surgical Procedure called Nasendoscopy.  So this entire experience costs me $374.55 just to see some earwax and hear a specialist say three magic words. You. Are. Ok.   Nobody, not even a qualified person, knows what is happening to her ears. But at least I know now it’s not contagious and I did not get a ear ache from her – the GP said mine was a case of an external ear infection, easily resolved with a round of antibiotics and some eardrops. I joined her in her sobbing nonetheless.

She doesn’t have to stay – she’s finished her loan and doesn’t need this job in the first place. Her family is extremely wealthy and prior to this job, she stays home to watch Korean drama all day. She once pointed to one of the bungalows in Thomson while on a car journey and said her house back at home looked like that. Her family owns land, dogs and horses. She rides a motorcycle and gets manicures, pedicures and hair treatment on a weekly basis. She came to Singapore because she was bored with her life and has now grown to love this job as our helper.

Last week, her replacement came (and went). The new one was a constant source of our frustration with her utter lack of initiative.
I am so angry.  I was made a fool last weekend. This replacement maid whom I’ve sent back to the agent is probably kicking her heels off in her hometown now, sipping a nice cup of tea, laughing at me, the sucker she suckered in Singapore.

Why couldn’t I tell she had no intention to work? Why couldn’t I read her better? Why did I even trust the recommendation of the agent? I knew I couldn’t trust her right from day one – she had those shifty eyes that made me very wary – but I just couldn’t put a finger to how I really felt about this new person in the house. The signs were everywhere – unwillingness to follow instructions, never smiling at my children, trying too hard to please only when I was around – I was the fool to believe the best; that she was trying to adapt to working in a new environment and needed time to adjust. 

The straw that broke the camel’s back?  This replacement held open the fridge door for a good two minutes looking for sugar despite being told many times where sugar was kept. and shoved a scalding hot mouthful of porridge into Becks’ mouth.

So when I told her I was sending her back to the agent on Saturday, she broke down and cried. I asked her if she wanted to go home instead and she said yes. I could do two things: buy her an air ticket and send her home (but this means she had to stay for a few days more till I get all the documents processed and the air ticket settled) or send her back to the agent and get them to buy her an air ticket on my behalf. I chose the latter, because it was infuriating to have her around every minute. So I assured her I would tell the agent to buy her a ticket home. And for the first time, in six days, she smiled genuinely. And laughed. She even told my Myanmar helper with such glee that she could finally go home.

So we went back to the agent and I paid her a month’s salary even though she “worked” only five days, and she’s off on a jet plane back home as of now, with this money. I’m thinking: did she maliciously stage this? Showing us such horribly lazy attitude just so she can worm her way out of here with a one-way air ticket fully paid for by the sucker that is me? I mean, these girls know that the moment they’ve found employment, no matter what, they would have to be paid 30 days’ worth of work even if the employers decide to return them to the agent, isn’t it? I knew I couldn’t trust those shifty eyes. And to think that I could have been used that way! It sure feels terrible to be suckered like that.

I have so many takeaways from this lesson: number one, the agent and domestic worker always stand to gain more than the employer, so from now on, I’m not gonna assume the best of everyone – this world is really the survival of the fittest and wittiest; and number two, the next domestic helper had better be able to look me in the eye for more than 20 seconds. Shift your eyes and I’ll stay clear of you. I’m not going to be your sucker anymore.

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Some of you might already know that I have been dealing with maid woes for a long, long time. In a nutshell, my domestic helper annoying, defiant, dirty (like really unhygienic), incredibly lazy, a big liar to say the least.. since she's been employed, shit always goes missing around the house (jewelry, money, even underwear)... Speaking of underwear, she was cleaning the floor one day and bended over wearing a low-cut pants so I accidentally saw that she was wearing MY La Senza underwear on her butt. Underwear thief!!!!!!! And jewelry? Well my mum has had a few expensive branded bags go missing for starters, and the Chanel necklace that Sam gave me for our anniversary also magically disappeared. That pissed me off a lot. It's not even about the money. What I'm angry about is that the item has so much sentimental value, and yet it was just taken away from me like that, probably now sitting in some pawn shop some where. To think that I lived with the thief for months and months after that infuriates me. I've barely touched the tip of the iceberg. I wonder why I let myself go through this torment.

So let me just give you a brief introduction about my maid.
My domestic helper, let's call her Y*... Was employed 1 year plus ago, before Christmas time. When she first arrived, I thought she was lovely. I honestly did. I thought she was sweet, polite, and better than my previous few maids. I believe I even tweeted nice things about her when she first arrived. Unfortunately for us, that was only at the start, her attitude changed completely after a few months.

Now, they say most maids are only nasty towards their employers if you aren't nice to them. Like if you overwork them, don't feed them nice enough food or are rude to them, they will be very stubborn and rebellious. I'd like to think I have been nice to Y* from the start. Definitely not so much towards the end, I'll have to admit,... but at the start, yes. Since her arrival was close to Christmas time, I invited her to hang up X'mas decorations with Sam & I. We hung ornaments on the X'mas tree together, and I respected her enough to change the placements of the way I hung my ornaments because she said it wasn't nice. Now, this probably means absolutely nothing to a person reading this statement, but I believed that by respecting her opinion however insignificant it may seem, listening to what she has to say and inviting her to take part in family-orientated activities will make her feel less like a stranger and hopefully more like family. In return, I wanted her to do her work properly and be nice to my family & I. I didn't want to live with a stranger, I had hoped to live with a maid I actually liked.

I remember it was New Year's Eve in 2010 and I didn't want her to spend it counting down all alone at home (we were all going out) so I insisted on taking her along with us to view the fireworks at Marina Bay Sands. My family members were flabbergasted at why I'd want to take the maid out on New Year's Eve but when I saw the smile on her face as she gazed up into the night sky in awe of the fireworks, I thought to myself, "it's worth it." Worth the taunting and eyeball rolling I had to endure from my family. Since I was a little girl, I've had many many different maids, more than I can count on my fingers. I've had great, good, bad and horrible. I certainly never thought this one would go so wrong.

Don't ask me when, how, or why... But along the way, after a couple months, Y* just respected us less & less. The way she talked to us was less polite, and she tried less often to please. Eventually she just became downright bloody fucking annoying, for example, asking question every single question twice (on purpose).

Case Study 1:

Me: "Can you pour me a cup of orange juice please?"
Y*: "With ice, or without?"
Me: "No ice."
Y*: "Ice ah??"

Case Study 2:

Me: "Hey, we are going to make dinner, chop some garlic."
Y*: "Onions also?"
Me: "No, just chop garlic will do."
Y*: "So garlic only ah??? You don't want onions ah???"

OMFG!! I know it sound so insignificant but try living with somebody so retarded that they ask you EVERY question twice, on purpose. To have to repeat yourself over and over is no fun. I've already told her, "Don't ask me questions twice! Just listen when I tell you the first time" but she doesn't care. At first I thought she was just being meticulous, like she wanted to make sure she doesn't do the wrong thing… which is fair enough, because a careful & annoying maid is better than a careless maid who could care less.

But after asking if I'd like some onions with my garlic and me saying no, she will STILL chop some motherfucking onions!!!!!!!!! I SAID NO RIGHT. Or, worse, she will chop only onions, no garlic like I had originally asked for. I'm pretty sure she's not deaf, she hears me fine, but chooses to go against me just for the heck of it. Wtf is wrong with people like that? Take note that I am not talking about individual, unique or isolated incidents. She does way more annoying things everyday but if I told you all the examples this post would 20k words long.

Being annoying, is something difficult to swallow, but I can still handle. You don't call the police on someone for being annoying. Besides being annoying, another star quality about her is also being lazy.

For people who have had enough maids, might have noticed that a lot of them will get quite lazy sooner or later (which I sort of understand) the real question is - to what extent?

Case Study 3:
Me: "Hey, can you cling wrap this cake (a cake fresh out of the oven) for me? I'm rushing to go out now and will not get back till late at night and I will need to decorate it later."

Y*: "Ok! Bye!"
Me: *goes out..... comes home 5 hours later, and sees the cake on the table...*

The cake was PATHETICALLY cling wrapped.. in fact I wouldn't even call it being cling wrapped. There's a piece of flimsy cling wrap carelessly placed on the top (barely enough to stretch over to the sides) and the sides and underneath are completely exposed. That's like asking a person to put the cake in a box, but they put a piece of cardboard on the top of the cake instead.

I was so angry because the fresh out of the oven cake that was still moist & fluffy is now hard and crusty and dry because it's been exposed to the air conditioned room for so long and all the moisture is all sucked out of it. Now, it needs to be baked again, and I'm running very short on time because the customer is coming to collect it soon, and if I can't finish it on time, I'm screwed. So I have 2 choices, give the customer a dry and crusty cake or risk not finishing on time and making the customer angry. I chose the latter, thankfully the customer arrived late as well.

All of this could've been prevented if she could cling wrap it properly, but no!!! She just can't. She has really taught me the strict lesson of "If you want something done, do it yourself" because she just can't seem to get anything right. Now you can argue and say "why didn't you cling wrap it yourself?" That's as good as saying, "why don't you do the housework yourself?" I'm paying the maid a monthly salary and providing her food & accommodation, do I not have the right to ask her to cling wrap something for me? Sigh. Little did I know she can't even complete a simple task like that. She knows perfectly well how important it is to keep the cakes cling wrapped (we do it all the time and show it to her) but she just cannot be bothered. When I confronted her about the poorly cling wrapped cake, she sulks, then looks at me and go, "I wrap! I wrap already!!! What is this plastic on the cake if I never wrap?"

Laziness aside, sometimes I think she's pure evil, because NOBODY could be this evil.

I was going to cook one day, when I saw that a whole lot of ants had gotten into my salt/sugar cooking jar, as it wasn't properly sealed. I didn't reprimand her for not storing the kitchen supplies properly (could've been prevented if it was shut tight, but I thought, ah heck honest mistake) so I handed the jar to her and said, "Hey, clean this, there's ants all over it and even crawling around INSIDE it, look!" and she took it off my hands. I forget about the jar, and didn't check to see if she did clean it or not.

A few hours later, I return to the kitchen to cook a meal. So here I am, fussing over my frying pan, cooking up a storm... she stands beside me, and then I ask, "Hey, can you pass me some sugar?" and she hands me the very same salt/sugar jar I gave her to wash before, still full of sugar/salt, but without the ants. I noticed that the amount was exactly the same as before, except this time, the jar wasn't filled with ants. It didn't necessarily look any cleaner.

Case Study 4:
I raise an eyebrow, and questioned, "Did you clean this?"
Y*: "Yess!!! Yes I did!! *defiant tone*"

Me: "I'M ASKING YOU. *raises voice* Did you clean this jar? Did you pour out all the salt / sugar, wash it with soap and water to get rid of the ants, or did you just clean the outside and scoop out the parts that had ants in it? HOW CAN YOU DO THIS?!?!?"

Y*: "I clean what..... You never say to throw away.. *sulks even more with a pouty face*" (hate her sulky face, she never apologizes, just sulks)
Unconvinced?  (sorry I just need to rant some more ok)

Case Study 5:

Me: "Hey, defrost the minced pork in the fridge please, I'm going to cook dinner."
Y:* "Okay."

I return to the kitchen half an hour later, ready to cook.
Me: "Minced pork defrosted already?"
Y* "Ya, ya... *hands me a bowl full of meat*

I hastily marinate the meat, as my grandmother is hungry and I'm making her dinner. She cannot eat too late because she will have gastric or problems digesting her food so I need to hurry up. I heat up my frying pan. I start to cook the "pork". As it is cooking, I get a whiff the aroma, and frown. Hmm... something's not right. This doesn't smell like pork. What is this???

Me: "Is this pork??? Why does it smell and look like beef?" (you can only tell when it's being cooked otherwise looks the same.. just minced)

Y*: "You said beef what. *rolls eyes*"

Me: "WHAT THE FUCK? (I literally said this out loud lol) I said minced pork!! I said pork, and you said ok! Why you didn't tell me it was beef, only until after I fry it, then you say it's beef?!"

Y*: "I hear you say beef. There is n-no.. no pork in the fridge ok." I can tell she is lying, because she's flustered and stuttering. She always stutters when she lies.

By this time my blood is boiling. I stomp over to the fridge, open the freezer compartment, and the first thing that I see is a packet of minced pork that has a label that says "minced pork - 250g" and a stupid damn cartoon flying PIG plastered on the packet staring back at me.

Me: *waving the packet of minced pork around in the air like a mad woman* "WHAT IS THIS??? Pork right?"

She replies, "Ya, but I didn't see it, really! Just now it wasn't there. If I see, I give it to you! Really!!!"

I'll tell you why I am so angry. It is not because I don't get to eat minced pork, but minced beef instead. My problem is, the beef packet was actually UNDERNEATH the pork packet, so she must have took a look at the pork, then realized there was beef and gave that to me instead, hoping I will not notice.. it does look the same, after all. I know she wouldn't know this, but it doesn't taste the same.. at ALL. Why would she do that? She's Muslim, she can't eat pork. If I cook beef, at least she can eat it. That is how selfish she is. She is super lazy, and the only thing she cooks for herself is maggi mee or fried rice, she never cooks even when I give her full permission to use my groceries to feed herself.

Besides her selfishness, I was so upset because my GRANDMOTHER cannot eat beef due to religious beliefs as well. It so happened I was making one of her favorite dishes for her dinner, vegetables with minced pork, but now she doesn't get to eat that despite hungrily waiting for me. I have to leave her disappointed. I've already mixed the vegetables in with the beef, and to defrost a brand new packet of frozen minced pork would take too long. I had also intended to save the minced beef to make hamburgers for Sam the next day. Now everybody loses. I can confidently say it was no honest mistake by my maid. I know her inside out by now, all her evil tactics and scheming. I can tell when she's lying, and when she's not. So easy to read. Maybe after reading a few of these examples, out of the hundreds I've experienced, some of you may understand why I dislike her so much.

I have tried being nicer to her, in hopes that she will mend her ways, for example when my mother was overseas and couldn't be around to give Y* her monthly salary on time, I offered to pay her out of my own pocket in advance so that she may enjoy her upcoming day off (she gets once or twice a month)

Instead of being grateful, she was meant to make breakfast for my grandmother in the morning - she didn't, just rushed out of the house. Was meant to be home by 6:30pm, came home at 7 plus instead. LATE + didn't do her job, and didn't even say sorry for being late or thank you for helping me advance my pay. What kind of ingrate is she, you tell me??? How to be nice to somebody like this?

Eventually, I gave up hope on her, and realized some people are just #%@%#@ born this way. YOU CANNOT FIX OR HELP THEM. Your kind actions will only be backfired.

I'll give you one final case study, that happened yesterday...  leading to the climax of this situation.

Case Study 6:
Yesterday, my friend N came over to the house to hang out. At about 3:30pm, we decided to go out for lunch, and as I was getting changed, N went downstairs to get his car out of the carpark and waited for me at the lobby. I looked in my handbag. There was $280 in cash. Not wanting to bring so much cash out, I took $10 and my card, then left the house. So there was $270 left in my bag.

I went downstairs and got into N's car. I suddenly realize I'd left something else in my handbag that I forgot to bring down. I ring the maid Y*, to bring down my handbag for me. Knowing she has a history of stealing stuff, I was kind of worried she might take my money again. BUT, I told myself, if she does, I will call the police this time. I have been so damn tolerant and forgiving towards her. I wouldn't ask her to bring down my handbag if I didn't need something in it - surely she knows this and is smart enough to refrain from stealing this time? If she steals money that I left on the table and totally forgot about, I CAN understand her reasoning. But this time, it's something I'm completely aware of, I use that handbag everyday, and I was requesting for it's presence. Surely she is not that daring.

She came down with my handbag after 5 whole minutes. She hands it to me. She hastily goes back up. I start to count my money.

$210 left.  WHAT!
*counts again, and again, and again.... looks at N with a bewildered look*

Yup. $210.
A fifty dollar note, and a ten dollar note, a total amounting to $60 went missing.

No, this can't be. No, that bitch had better not touch my money.  I ran out of N's car, and went upstairs to my house. I was totally overcome with anger, because this time, I'M SO SURE.

Other times when I lose my money, or when I lose my clothes / necklaces, I can't remember the exact details, like the last time I'd seen it or where I'd placed my purse... and I dare not make a police report against her because I NEED to be really sure before doing something so drastic. This time, I was really sure. It was just minutes ago that I was upstairs in my room counting my money. There was no one else in the house except my old grandmother and brother who was still sleeping. They do not steal. Y* does.

Overcome with anger, I literally ran all the way from the car to the corridor to my house. I banged on the door, and when she opened the door, she looked at me. She knew. She knew that I knew what she did. I can tell by the look of fear in her eyes. She probably saw the fire in mine.

I said in a stern tone, "I know what you did. Give me back my money NOW, or I will call the police. If you just admit your mistake and give me the money, I will forgive you. But if you don't, I'll call the police right now."

Y*: "Money? I never take your money!!! I SWEAR!!!"

She then starts to shout back.... and then swears more... then challenges me. "OK LA, YOU CALL THE POLICE! I NOT SCARED, I NEVER DO ANYTHING WRONG."

I didn't think I'd do it myself, but I picked up the phone and dialled 999. An operator answers. I ask, "what happens if I suspect my maid has stolen money? can I ask for assistance?" ....Within 15 minutes, police officers were ringing my door bell.

And the rest was history. I'm not sure if it's legal for me to reveal exactly what happened between the police, Y* and I, but after 3 hours+ of investigation, she was brought away in handcuffs in a police car. She never once appeared to be remorseful, or apologetic. She was so cocky.

So cocky, in fact, that she challenged the police: "Why don't you search and question N as well? He was also in the house!" Because N was already downstairs by the time I last checked my money, you evil witch!!! How dare you try and get my friend into trouble to save your sorry ass?!?.... At first, all I felt was anger, then after I calmed down, what I felt was sadness. I felt really sad for her when I saw them flipping through her stuff and questioning her and then finally handcuffing her before my very eyes. That moment was completely shocking to me. I knew that criminals deserve to be handcuffed and be put away, especially when they take me for a sucker AGAIN AND AGAIN, but I still felt awful inside. I do hate her in so many ways and have actually WISHED for this very moment many times before, but to see it happen.... also didn't feel right. I wish someone else had made the police report instead, I wish someone else had their things stolen, so that I wouldn't have to be the one feeling all the guilt, but I could still see justice being served. I guess in this way, I'm also quite naive and stupid. I'd like to think I'm not a cold-hearted person. I don't like to see people in misery, and she was in handcuffs right then.

I felt so crippled with guilt at night that I could barely sleep. Tossed and turned all of last night. I couldn't decide if my conscience or sense of righteousness has gotten the better of me. Sure, she's been making my life a living hell since the first few months she's lived here, and probably deserves to rot away in jail for all that she's done... but when all is said and done, she still has lived in the same house as my family and I for over a year. As much as I dislike her, there's some parts of her that I do not totally hate.

Think of it as living with a pet that is really naughty and made your life more difficult than enjoyable.

You pay for the damn thing, hoping it will be a good addition to your life. It's not exactly necessary, but you figured the benefits it is meant to bring would be worth it rather than living on your own. At the start, your little puppy is fluffy and cute. But after a few months, it's less cute, it grows up and is less intimidated by you, then starts to pee and shit everywhere. It rips up your clothes and furniture. You try to be nicer to it, hoping it will love you in return, but all it does is be a complete brat. It's uncontrollable. You start to question your decision of ever bringing it home in the first place and ask god what have you ever done to deserve this sort of company when all you ever wanted was someone (something) nice to live with. Eventually, you give up hope, as no amount of training or disciplining worked, and you resign to your fate. One day, you find it chewing up your favorite expensive dress. Horrified, you tried to give it a second chance but it bit you as you tried to tear it away from the dress. You get so effin' angry in the heat of the moment, you decide to give it away immediately.

After all the grief your dog from hell provided you, would you still feel sad when it's time to let go? Yes, you would. A tinge of guilt, like "perhaps I wasn't a good enough owner".. If you had a heart. Because no matter what, time spent together still creates a bond, no matter how faint. (Btw I am in no way saying she's a dog, just using the pet theory as an example for people who don't have maids and don't know what this would feel like)

I've said a lot of horrible things about her. But there are a few times she's done nice things for me. Give credit where credit is due. She's not a completely evil person. Yes, horrid and evil sometimes, but not to the core, not 100%. She has her moments. Like when she makes dessert and food without us asking her to then excitedly offering it to us, hoping for our approval. Like when she helps me out with my cake work, I really appreciate that. Like when she tries to be patient with my grandmother.. not a lot of people can handle the elderly well. She has made me laugh, and tried cheering me up some times when I have fights with Sam. I will not forget those times. So, I feel sorry for that part of Y*. The small nice part I'd like to believe exists somewhere inside her, that was much more evident the first week she came to live with this family. It may have decayed during the past year, but hopefully it's not wiped out. When a serial murderer gets caught and thrown in jail, everyone rejoices. But she's not a serial murderer. Yes, she stole my money, clothes, underwear, and did so many bad things.... but I still wasn't sure if I wanted to see her in jail. That would really suck for her. I don't want anything on my conscience.

After they took her away, I had a lot of time to reflect upon my actions and hers.

Long story short, I decided not to pursue the matter anymore, and after she spent a night being locked up and interrogated, I bailed her out today. Immediately, I bought her a ticket home. Barely a few hours ago, her agent took her, and left. She's probably in Indonesia by now. As she was packing her things, I felt sad, but glad that she didn't need to go to jail. At least, not because of me. My mum told me last night, "We're all humans, we don't have to make her so miserable the way she makes us." And I agree. I should be better than that. I hope the police incident and being handcuffed and locked up was enough to scare her from ever stealing from other people again. I really do hope she changes for the better, and does more good with her life, wherever she may choose to go. She looked relieved (duh) to be released and being able to go home, but what pissed me off was how she still insisted, "I didn't steal your money."

I replied, "You don't have to say anything any more. Even if you didn't steal my money this time, you dare say you've never EVER stolen my money before? All the things you have done, you know deep down in your heart, and I do too. That's enough. I hope you're nicer to people you meet next time. Be a good person." She smiled at me. I can't remember if I managed a smile back. For the first time, she actually looked happy. She wasn't scowling, or sulking like she does every single day for the past year... Somehow I also felt happy for her, and for myself, that both our miseries were coming to an end. I don't think she liked working for us either. We both deserve better than this.

I am no longer angry. I just have so much sorrow. And I'm confused, because what was rage and anger then guilt, now turned straight into pity and empathy. I can barely copy with all these emotions..... I tried to put myself in her shoes. I don't know what it's like to be poor. I have known envy, but never the spiteful envy or the heavy desperation enough to drive me to steal from other people. Perhaps she sees all the nice things I have, and thinks I don't deserve to be leading a better life than her. And in some ways, I guess I don't. Where you're born and which family you're born into is luck of the draw, life's sick lottery. The world is not fair. I was born into an easier life, and I don't have to work in another country to support my family back home. This is a painful reminder I sometimes forget. I'm sure she has her own set of problems to deal with that causes her to behave the way she does.

As she was leaving my house for the final time, she told all of us, "I'm really sorry if I had done anything wrong to you guys. Thank you for having me here." She even held my hand as she said it. It actually meant a lot to me that she said that. At least I knew she wasn't angry at me for calling the police on her, and that, at the end of the day... she can leave on a relatively good note. I don't want anyone hating me. I looked at her luggage and the clothes she was wearing and the bag she was carrying and realized that 90% of her belongings were in good condition, and they were clothes that I had given her. They were not the scraps she had worn when she first entered our home. A lot of the clothes I have given her are still brand new and unworn when she first received them. Despite knowing that she's stolen from me before (underwear and money) I still gave her nice clothes. Because I knew I was not unkind to her and did quite the best that I could, that made me feel a lot better. I never starved her, I often cooked for her, I never deprived her of using her mobile phone, watching TV, going out on off days... I think I've been very reasonable. That's good enough for me. I assure you, I don't treat my maids horribly. Most of them have a much better life living in our household than in others. I treat them like proper human beings, not like slaves as some people do.

She waved to me, smiling, as the car drove away.....And that was the end of a chapter in our lives. I came back up to my room, thought about things for awhile.. and burst into tears. I'm not sure why I'm so emotional. I wish all this never happened, to be honest. It's a lot to handle. I think it's also to do with the fact that I'm having my period, and it was so difficult going through this alone when my mother and Sam wasn't in Singapore with me. I have to take care of my grandmother and my brother, I'm like in charge of the house and I have huge responsibilities on my shoulder. Now that everything is settled, I'm so relieved, but still very affected by what has happened. If I didn't have N to go through this with me, I don't know what I would've done.

I hope I did the right thing. We're going to be without a maid for awhile, but heck, people have lived this way for thousands of years, why can't we?!?!?!  I'll be less spoilt this way, right? Whatever. We'll get by.

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What are the things we cannot assume that our maid knows?
Winter: Even if she knows, she doesn't feel it is necessary to be careful, think not that serious or felt it is her duty to help you keep your precious child or house safe.  It seems like prevention, be safe is not something registered in a FDW's brain.  If such info has been instilled by the training centres, there won't be accident of maids falling down from HDB windows. 

Spore FDW's employer has been forced by MOM to babysit our adult FDW, keep her safe ... this theory is really wrong.  Aren't we suppose to treat FDWs like a sensible working adults, not big babies requiring constant supervision?  MOM thought we don't need to work, WE-employers are very free, can stay home to be eagles.  If I can stay home, I don't need to employ a FDW to waste my money, effort and time.  

They do not know that they are not supposed to use one bucket of water to mop the whole house as they do not know the real purpose of mopping the floor.  Most of them mop the floor because you want them to mop but they do not know it is because the floor must be clean.

They do not know the sequence of tidying and cleaning.  They should first wipe the painting/picture, clock, then the tables & chairs, paintings… etc before they start to sweep the floor.
They do not know that they should switch off the fan before they sweep the floor or else the dust will fly all over the house.

They do not know that when there is a cover on the cup, the cover also has to be washed together with the cup.  Most of them only wash the cup and simply placing the cover back into the cupboard.  The next time, when they serve you the drink, the un-washed cover will be used to cover your cup.
They do not know that when they clean the house, if they spot an unusual insect in the house, like a termite, they should inform you.

They do not know how to hand wash your clothes.  Back home, my maid used a stick to hit on the clothes.  If you don’t have a stick for her to use, she will not know how to hand wash your clothes.  Please ask her to demonstrate to you first before you let her do it using her method.

They do not know when tidying the garden, they should wear a glove to protect themselves.
They do not know how to use the dish washing sponge correctly and which type of sponge to clean what type of utensil.  Usually your non-stick rice cooker will lose its non-stick ability after they wash it.

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33 months jail for maid who abused child, Mar 26, 2011, Today
A 17-year-old Indonesian maid has been sentenced to 33 months' jail for abusing her ex-employer's daughter who was then only a year old.

The maid is not named to protect the girl's identity.  The maid, who ill-treated the toddler in a Bedok Reservoir Road flat in November and December 2009, pleaded guilty to eight of 19 child abuse charges.

Within a space of just five days, the teenager kicked the girl and slapped her several times. She also dragged the child by the hand across the living room before dropping her onto a mattress.

The abuse caused the girl to suffer injuries, including bruises to her legs.  On Friday, the court was shown video clips of the maid committing the offence.

Deputy Public Prosecutor Wong Woon Kwong said that the girl's parents had installed several closed-circuit cameras inside their flat without the maid's knowledge.  That is because the toddler's grandmother had complained that the maid was lazy and had hit the girl even though she was told not to do so.

The girl's parents viewed the CCTV footage captured on December 6 and were shocked to learn of their daughter's ordeal.

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Stop maid sexpolitation (source)
It’s very disturbing to see them frolicking, sensuous, behaving intimate in public. At the East Coast Park every Sunday, Banglas and maids pitch tents as their love nests for their immoral activities, more so when it rains. The parks and beaches are a public recreational area and mostly for family outings. We look towards Sunday being a leisurely day, but are faced with this disgusting sight. The embarrassing sight no doubt leaves an inedible mark on the family and our children.

A family friend swear that he will never again visit Sentosa on Sunday, and most Spore families avoid going to such parks public places again. No sensible minded Singaporean will approve of such obnoxious behavior. It’s becoming too common an unsightly on weekends, loath by S’poreans. Sunday is no more a S’porean leisurely day, besides being an eyesore they are squeezing S’porean of recreational space.

Most of these country girls, have never seen a foreigner before, let alone a smooth talking Bangla. These lonely innocent rural bumpkin, ever smiling, pleasing, obliging maids are too easy picking for sex starved Bangla/Indian workers. These maids are someone’s daughter, mum or a wife in their country. While it takes two to tango, these maids being away from their country, from their parents or husband preying eyes, let their hair down while working in Singapore. It just takes time when the maid will succumb to coaxing and when hooked, the wolves desires are fulfilled and weekly servicing, f.o.c. Some affairs lasted for years, its also quite common for a Bangla/Indian to have multiple maids.
The maids sinister liaisons don’t just end on the weekend, there are numerous cases where the maids invite their Bangla lovers to their employers home, and satisfy their lust on the bosses bed. A woman employer recently tells me of her distaste and anger. She threw out the whole bed set and got a new one. This is trespassing. In this case, maid agencies must inform the police, the law must apprehend them.

There must be guidelines about spending their off days, rules and regulations not to abuse and misbehave. There’s no free will of how they spend their off days, they must behave responsible. They are here to work, they got a job and now a weekly off day.  They can’t have it all here, not in Singapore.

If the govt managed to clean our Geylang areas of China woman and save Spore families, then monitoring and controlling these indecent behavior will be not much of a problem. The maids must be aware not to offer their bodies for a packet of rice, hand phone top-up or less. They come here to work for a decent income, not be companions

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Maid caught having sex with 12-year-old Boy in HDB flat, 12 May 2010, Straits Times

Barely five months after she began working for the family, a domestic worker allegedly had sex with her employer’s 11-year-old son.

An Indonesian maid working in Singapore was hauled to court for havingsex with her employer's 12-year-old son.

The 27-year-old is alleged to have caused the boy - with his consent - to engage in oral sex at the HDB unit in the east on Dec 25 last year.  She is also accused of causing the boy to have sex with her sometime at end-June and mid-December last year.

The fourth charge under the Children and Young Persons Act states that she committed an obscene act with a child by engaging in sex and oral sex with him between end-June and Dec 25.

The court has ordered the name of the victim to be withheld or anything that will lead to his identification.  If convicted of the sexual penetration of a minor under 16, she can be jailed for up to 10 years and fined on each charge.

The maximum penalty is a fine of up to S$5,000 and/or a jail term of up to two years.  The short and bespectacled domestic worker was offered bail of S$20,000. 

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An Asian housemaid in Abu Dhabi waited for her Arab employer and his wife to go out before laying their one-year-old boy naked on the bed, took her clothes off and raped him, unaware of the hidden cameras installed in the house.
The film showed the maid and the baby both naked as she sat on top of him, ignoring his cries because of pain.
Annoyed by his non-stop cries, the maid then beat the baby and placed a pillow on his face to stiffle his noise as she continued abusing him.

She was arrested in the capital.

The prosecutor accused the maid of raping the baby and endangering his life. When she was shown the film, she confessed to her crime. 
Quoted by the semi-official daily Alittihad, a prosecution source said the maid faces up to 15 years in jail in line with the federal law meting out such punishment against crimes involving rape of people under 14 years.

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Water tank maid, Jul 2012

168 households had their drinking water supply affected by the corpse of Indonesian maid, Ruliyawati, according to the Chinese newspaper, Lianhe Wanbao.  The case has been classified as murder by the police. The Straits Times reported that a Bangladeshi man had been arrested in connection with the case. 

The victim and the Bangladeshi man were believed to have been in an intimate relationship. He was seen limping and had cuts on his legs when he was led away by the police at 10.40am.

The Straits Times reported that Bangladeshi Md Repon Mostafa, 29, was originally accused of causing the death of Indonesian maid Ms Ruliyawati, 30 at the rooftop of Block 686B Woodlands Drive 73 on May 16.

The story made headlines last year after the dead body of an Indonesian maid was discovered on May 16 inside the rooftop water tank of Block 686B, Woodlands Street 73.

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Copied this from a filipino domestic helper's employer.  Having these examples do not mean only filipinos can be house thieves or be bad domestic helpers.

I can only read English so if any Indonesian post in Bahasa, Indian or a Myanmese FDW writer, there's no way I can understand unless somebody translates and kind enough to post it in my blog, under 'comment'.  Just take it that all humans will err, be it Indonesian, Filipino, Australian or Sporean .... nobody is perfect!  You can be a better employee.  The choice is yours!  Nobody can feed you cow dung if you clearly said no.  If you really needed a decent job (not act like spolit brat/princess), you'll change voluntarily and accept the terms dished out to you by your prospective employers.  If you are a contented and sensible person, do your tasks as per job requirements, have not forgotten what you were getting in your own country, you are the ideal worker any employer would want to employ and treat you nicely for being so helpful and cooperative.

I hate it when things like this happen. She was a nice girl with a 1y/o daughter whom I was very fond of. However, money started vanishing. At first I wasn't sure, then it was clear something was wrong. I have several people working for me, so I didn't want to accuse the wrong person. I set 30p out on the credenza by the door one night to give one of the guys in the morning to go buy a bottle of water. The next morning it was gone.

Of course, no one knew what happened to it. I was fairly sure it was the maid, but I didn't want to accuse her without some kind of proof. That night, I called everyone together and told them even though it was only 30p, a theft was a theft and I was not happy. I went on to say if the money didn't come back by morning, there were going to be serious consequences, but I didn't spell out what they might be.

The next morning, I'm sitting at my desk doing my normal Internet thing, when the maid comes in and starts cleaning the desk. She never does this, because I don't like my work space messed with, so I was suspicious. She picked up my eye glass cleaning towel and out dropped my 30p! "Look at that!" she says. "You had your money all the time, you just didn't look in the right place!" Said with a gloating look on her face.

Good theory to be sure, except I'd just used the cloth earlier that morning to clean my glasses! So, I asked her why she felt it was ok to take my money? She denied taking it and stuck with the, "it was in the towel" story. She left the room and my GF said she was very happy, singing while she worked.

Then GF tells me that she was missing 1,000p from her purse a few weeks ago. She wasn't sure it was taken, but it looked like maybe someone had disturbed her purse. She didn't tell me earlier because she really liked the maid and felt sorry for her. Later that morning, one of the guys comes up to me and says you know I borrowed 500p from her a few weeks ago, but I paid her back with interest. Ok, but where did she get the 500p it was no where near pay day? Another guy told me he'd borrowed 200p from her about the same time, but he too had paid it back.

So I confronted her about this and of course she denied everything, but the more I pressed her, the more she was looking down, refusing to look at me and then her story started to change, so at that point I was certain she was the one. So, I told her today at 1PM she had to be packed and out of here by 4PM. She was in denial at first, then refused to leave, then went back into denial. Finally I had to raise my voice and tell her she was leaving at 4PM and if that meant I had to take her clothes out and dump them outside the gate, so be it.

She finally realized I was serious, packed her bags and I called a tryke for her and gave her the salary she was owed. That irked me to no end, because she stole more than that, but I know that under the law I still owed her wages even if she was a thief.

What I found interesting is that after she realized she couldn't lie her way out of the problem she packed her things and left, but not once apologized to me, or asked me to forgive her. Is that the Filipino way, or just her?

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Another fact of life about helpers is that you can never find one that’s perfect. I doubt you can tell others you're the perfect employee other companies dying to hire.  So they don’t exist. Maybe they work hard but they are not honest. Or they are honest but they don’t work hard. Or they are honest and work hard but are unpleasant and always have a scowl on their face. Or maybe they are honest and work hard and are pleasant but they are dumb (act stupid, forgetful) and always making mistakes. There’s always a problem and you have to accept some level of imperfection.

If you have to fire a helper this can be an awkward process. You have to consider the reason for her being fired. If she is just incompetent and did nothing grievously wrong and you feel she is honest, then make up a story that has nothing to do with your dissatisfaction and give her a month warning or notice of termination. This is quite risky but how kind you want to be, only you know.

If there is a serious problem that requires her immediate dismissal, such as you catch her stealing something, then just be firm and have her leave immediately. You will still have to pay expenses for her to get back to her province. Don’t hand her the severance pay until she has packed, handed you the house keys and at Changi airport departure gate. You may want to consider changing the locks.

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Agency ordered to pay for maid's abortion, Sep 2010, The New Paper 
Her maid complained of stomach cramps and that "something was coming out of her".  When the employer took the Indonesian maid to a doctor, she was shocked to find out that the maid was about four months pregnant.  The maid ended up having an abortion, which the employer, who wanted to be known only as Mrs Chan, paid for.

Upset with Besthelper Management for giving her a pregnant maid, Mrs Chan went to the Small Claims Tribunal to recover the medical cost of about $4,000.  The agency had shown her a medical report stating that the maid was not pregnant.

Earlier this month, the Small Claims Tribunal ordered the agency to reimburse Mrs Chan, who's in her 40s and works at a bank.  She had gone to Besthelper in April to hire a maid to care for her 71-year-old mother and 15-year-old son.

The 29-year-old maid started work that same month.  Mrs Chan said the maid, who's married with a seven-year-old daughter, returned to Singapore in February after spending three months in Indonesia.  The maid often complained about gastric pains and was not eating well, but Mrs Chan did not suspect anything amiss until the morning of June 12 when the maid complained of stomach cramps.

The day before, Mrs Chan had noticed that the maid's stomach was bulging and asked if she was pregnant. But she said no.  Mrs Chan said: "I believed her. I thought she was having problems with her menstruation cycle and her stomach.

"But when I drove her to a family doctor (on June 12), I wasn't so sure. In the car, she kept saying something was coming out of her. She also complained she was bleeding (at the vagina)."

For health reasons and because she has a daughter in Indonesia, the maid decided to go for an abortion at the Thomson Medical Centre that same day.  Under the law, abortion is available to women who are pregnant for less than 24 weeks.  Mrs Chan said she informed the Ministry of Manpower (MOM) after the abortion.

In her summary of facts submitted to the Tribunal, she accused Besthelper of misrepresenting the maid's employment record.  She said: "If I had known that (the maid) had been transferred three times during the last two years and was sent back to Indonesia once, I would not have picked her as I had made it very clear to...the maid agent...that I needed someone with either clean or good employment record in Singapore."

Mr Bernard Chia, manager of Besthelper, submitted to the Tribunal the maid's medical report dated February 25, which showed she was not pregnant then.  This means she may have been less than a week into her pregnancy when she had her medical examination, he said.

"Based on the sensitivity of test kits now in the market, the test would not have picked up a pregnancy at such an early stage," he said.  According to the MOM website, a foreign domestic worker has to pass a medical examination within 14 days of arriving here.

Two years ago, it was reported that one employer was left with a medical bill of $67,000 because her maid was pregnant and gave birth prematurely.  MAIDS must go for medical examinations every six months to screen for infectious diseases and pregnancies, according to the Ministry of Manpower (MOM) website.  Employers have to pay for these exams.

Winter: A FDW who fails a medical exam has to be repatriated at Employer’s cost.  If there’s maid loan involved, being the easiest target, Employer most likely to burn his/her pocket.  You have to blame MOM’s policy, they are pro-maid and pro-agency.  Maids will have to kiss MOM for being so kind to them.  Agencies will have to thank MOM for giving them so many chances to earn easy money from the ill-fated Employers.

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A maid who acts, great pretender

At first it was the language problem. She only knows single English words plus a bit of Malay, so we figured that an Indonesia maid would be a better option for our situation.  Unfortunately we employed an Indonesian maid that understood Mandarin but kept it as a secret.

Mom struggles to communicate with her.  She pretend not to understand and escape to do things and when I came back from work at night, mom will tell me about her frustrations and I would try my best to be the translator.

The funny things is, every time when mom talk to me about her in the room, she will seat near the staircase to listen to our conversation instead of going to bed even when it is already her bed time.
The next day before I have talk to her about it, I will find things that my mom complains about being done the exact way mom want it to be; and that gave me no room to talk to her as well as a false impression that my mom was just unreasonable and always like to complain about the maid.   The person that needs counciling is my mom and not the maid.

After many such situations, I noticed something was not right.  I started to observe her carefully and noticed that when we talked in Mandarin during dinner, when someone tells a joke, she actually laughs with us. 

After many such tests, we confirmed that she really did understand but just did not want to admit it.  
It is very sad that she did not make good use of her skill in her work but rather used it to create conflict in the family unnecessarily.  If unfortunately you hired such a maid, the only advice I can give you is to believe what your family tells you as family will always stand by each other no-matter what happens.

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FDW's employer gets punished not for something he/she did but for something that somebody else (the maid) did. Furthermore, once the maid leaves the employer's residence, the employer has no way of monitoring where the maid goes and what she does there.  Are we suppose to install tracking device on each FDW?

We may draw a curious parallel with Mas Selamat's escape and PM Lee's determined, if muddled, defence of Home Affairs Minister Wong Kan Seng in Parliament.

Mas Selamat ran away but PM Lee said that Wong Kan Seng was not at fault and should not be punished in any way. The reason being that Wong Kan Seng personally did not do anything which allowed Mas Selamat to escape.

Strangely, if your maid runs away, it is YOUR FAULT and you SHOULD be punished. Even if you did not personally do anything to let her run away (apart from giving her a day off), your name is printed on her work permit so you're liable.

Similarly, if your maid becomes pregnant, it is YOUR FAULT and you SHOULD be punished. Even if you did not personally do anything to make her pregnant.  You had been nice to her by giving her leeway (during official working hours) or let maids take off days to relax but she pays back by getting you into trouble.  MOM’s policies termed it as Employers deserve to clean FDW's mess and foot all costs due to her irresponsible actions.  In their eyes, you're not a human being, deserve any form of respect or protection, you're just a conveniently located ATM machine.

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30 May - FDW's employer framed by maid   Source  
Why do we have meet the people session? Can these “sessions” helped us? I really really wonder. Today, I went to seek my MP, Mr Khaw Boon Wan for help.

The story begins in February when my then maid R informed that she wanted to go home as her mother is sick. I told her to re-consider as she had only work 9 months. But she was adamant about going home so I brought her back to the agent. The agent told her off and we arrange to bring an new domestic helper in to assist me. The agent then asked her if she is willing to wait till the new helper comes. The agent told her that it will be about a month and she said it is OK.

When we were back home, I told her that I think it will probably takes more than a month as I worked with this agent many times previously and he had never been able to get me a helper in a month, but she replied that it is OK.
Then few days later, she came crying saying that she changed her mind and her mother told her to stay. I then told her that nothing can be done as I have signed for a new helper. (What I didn’t tell her was even I had not, I will not take her back as she does nothing the next few days after indicating her interest to go home.)

My this helper R is under the old contract whereby there is no off days, but out of compassionate, we gave her one off a month. Then her cousin, another fellow Fillipino sms to threaten me to give her more off days or they will complain to MOM. I of course ignored him as her contract says no off.

Then on 16 March 2013, she ran away. It was Saturday morning 7 am, and she sms saying that she will go to the embassy. I was rather surprised and tried to call her phone but she off it, so I sms her cousin telling her that I will have to make a police report on this issue.
What came after was a nasty SHOCK to me, her cousin replied tauting me to go ahead and that they had “warned” me and that they had videos “proof” of her working as a sales assistant at my push cart. Now, I owned a cart and employed ONLY SINGAPOREANS to work, on the rare occasion that my staff is off, I will have to stand in. This happens like once or twice a month, BUT I NEVER EVER ASKED HER TO TEND THE SHOP! This is pure accusation and deframation!

I was very worried but the police told that they will look into it. After lodging the report, I immediately went down to my shop and ask my neighbours for help. I asked if they can be my witness that I did not asked her to work. Very lucky for me, my neighbour then told me she recently installed a CCTV and the CCTV can see my shop and thus proof my innocence.

Then MOM called me up and advised that it is not worth my efforts to take this up and so I will buy her an airticket and send her home MOM agrees that I had not violated any regulations. I agreed thinking I can black list her and stop bad eggs like her from returning to Singapore to work. Thus imagine my surpise, that MOM now says that this is a civil case, not a criminal case and they cannot black list her.

She lied and tried to threaten me. She told the kids she will return and bring them out. She deframes me with the malicious intentions. If I do not have the CCTV, will I be jailed? I really don’t know.

So today, I went to meet the people session to ask my MP for help. He was not there as he is tied up in Parliament. The person “assisting” me told me NOTHING can be done. They cannot help me to appeal to MOM to black list her and I am probably “ over reacting” to the whole situation

SO foreigners come in, tell lies about us and if we have no proof, we go jail. But if they lie they go scot –free and free to come back to con another Singaporean.

During the trial, it was revealed that her employer, Mr Goh Chee Kuang’s younger sister, had accused the maid of stealing money, and was planning to complain to the employment agency when she returned from her holiday.

Mr Goh claimed this, coupled with the woman’s failure in trying to seduce him on Dec 26, could have been the reason she decided to accuse him.

The prosecution has appealed against the acquittal.
The maid had been sent to stay in Mr Goh’s flat in Elias Road between Dec 17 and Dec 29, 2010, while his younger sister was in Taiwan.

In her police statement, the maid claimed that Mr Goh had barged into the bathroom and hugged her while she was naked. But in court, she said he touched her breasts, buttocks and her private parts. When asked why she did not say this to the police, she first insisted that she did, then later said that the police did not ask her specific questions about how she was molested.

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Police arrest Indonesian maid for Bukit Merah murdersThe police arrested on Monday an Indonesian maid for the gruesome Bukit Merah double murder of her employer and daughter.  If the 22-year-old maid is found guilty of killing the woman and her daughter late last month, she faces the death penalty.

It started out as a tragic tale of a working mother, her two children and their maid being trapped in a fire at the woman's office.  34-year-old Angie Ng, and her 3-year-old daughter Crystal died. But her Indonesian maid and 1-year-old son Leon were rescued.

The maid Sundarti Suporiyanto and the boy suffered burns and were warded at the Singapore General Hospital burns unit.  But within hours, the plot took a very sinister twist. The fire was nothing more than a smoke screen -- for a double murder.

The woman had slash wounds on her arms and had been stabbed in the neck, while her daughter was stabbed in the chest.  The woman's husband - Mr Drake Poh - who is behind a 5-star hotel and casino in Myanmar, was away on business.

Then came reports the maid was caught on a surveillance tape at a petrol station buying a can of petrol just before the blaze.  She was arrested when she got out of hospital. The maid will be charged in Court with two counts of murder on Tuesday.

When Channel NewsAsia contacted the family of the murdered woman, they said that they were relieved by the arrest.  They said the maid was new, and they did not know what motive she had. They hope this will become clearer during the trial.
Due to above, Grief-stricken hubby gives up on life in year 2008 (read)
Leon, the son who survived called out to him in tears. He told him, 'Daddy, please don't give up. You have to take care of me'.

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She went out of the house when nobody's at home, leaving the house unlocked and meeting up with her friend, leaving the dog alone. I'm not sure whom she met and for what? She might even bring strangers in my hourse. Not sure if she fed my dog.

By the time we found out something wrong, she's been doing it for a long time already.  When I gave her a chance to come clean, and tell me how many times she's been leaving the house.

She started to lie.  After 2 hours, I started to get sick of her lies.  I told her if she didn't want to be honest with me. I don't think she can continue to stay here.  She claimed, "Even I tell you the truth, you will fire me anyway. Why I need to be honest?"

She didn't want to apologise at all & didn't want to tell the truth at all only because I didn't guarantee her to stay.  Do I have a right to know what happened when I'm not at home? Who she met? Where she went? For how long? Did she feed the dog?

She only admitted she went out (because I caught) but refused to explain NOTHING. 
My heart was totally broken because she wanted me to give her guarantee to be honest?
Then I reported to my husband. When he came home to confront her, he also gave her a chance to explain.  She said she didn't want to explain.   (we guessed the truth is too ugly to let us know in detail. We still don't know how many times she's been out of the house to meet her friends.)

I still can't believe to see the real face of her and I already don't know who she really is.  I've been treating her as my sister, taking care of her and trusting her.   When her husband cheated on her, she was crying like hell. All my family supported & comforted her.

It's the first time I saw a very different side of her. She only cares about benefits. No benefits, no honesty.

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Indonesian maid seduces husband, burns down apartment and attempts suicide
- By The Asian Parent | 20/09/2012    Source

Like any busy parents with a family, we relied on foreign maids. It seems so common nowadays. I remember my late-mother-law saying to my husband Colin and I that she never needed maids in her day. My husband liked to point out to his mother that things were different back then
I bet maids back in my mother-in-law’s day never tried to seduce husbands. Or tried to burn down the home and commit suicide.

Several years ago, we grew to be quite fond of Pilar, our old Filipino maid, but we had to say goodbye to her when her contract ended. She carried out her duties without complaint, really. Our five-year-old son, Brian was also quite attached to Pilar.

Our positive experiences with Pilar made me overlook my initial gut responses to our next maid. We switched maid agencies and they sent Gema, from Indonesia.  Gema was 25 years old and in retrospect, she already gave me chills when I first set eyes on her. She seemed too worldly for someone who claimed to come from the countryside. Gema had waist-length black hair and sharp eyes, like a crow’s. When we picked her up from the agency, she gazed at Colin for several seconds too long and admired our brand new Toyota Corolla.

The first three weeks with Gema passed without event. However, one day I was at work, I received a frantic phone call from the management of my condominium:
“Excuse me, are the you one of the owners of this unit?” asked the manager.
“Yes, why?”
“Your apartment is on fire.”

I called my husband and quickly left the office and drove home. When I arrived, there was a fire engine waiting at the foot of the block. My heart stopped beating until I saw Brian standing with Gema at the entrance. Luckily he was not hurt, just rather disorientated. According to the firemen, a small fire had started in the kitchen and set off the smoke alarms. Since Gema had been home alone with Brian, I asked her what had happened. She said that one of the rings on the electric stove had caught fire. Which I found to be strange, because it was a new stove.

Then my phone rang — it was Colin, asking me to come up to our apartment. When I got there, the whole floor stank of smoke. The smell was even worse inside the sooty apartment. A fireman was standing in the kitchen (one side of the cabinets and counter had been badly scorched) and showing something to Colin.

“Your fire seems to have started from here.” the fireman pointed to a blackened round metallic container. It was the remains of the garbage can, with remnants of burnt newspaper stuffed inside it. Small sticks of what looked like used matches were scattered over the kitchen floor.
Colin quizzed Gema again over the cause of the fire, yet she stuck to the story she had told me. Since the stove was electric there was no need to light the gas with a flame, and Gema didn’t smoke. Seeing that all of us had been through a rough time I didn’t question further. Since our kitchen was out of order, we ate out for the next two weeks

This part is the hardest to tell, mainly because when I tried to tell my friends about it they just made jokes and thought I was being paranoid. But I feel it’s difficult to see when you’re not seeing it from day-to-day with your own eyes.

A month after the fire, Gema started letting down her hair. She really had lovely shiny black hair, down to her waist. Every time she walked past my husband, she would swish her hair at him as if she was a model in a shampoo advert. Colin ignored this gesture, but I found it annoying. When I tried to tell her to get a haircut or tie up her hair she would agree, but never do it. When I found a strand of long black hair in Brian’s porridge and then lost my temper with Gema. Only after that she tied up her hair.

But Gema’s flirting didn’t stop there. She would giggle at the most minor things Colin would say to her and a few times I caught her eagerly brushing ‘specks of dust’ off his suit, when he came home in the evenings. Normally she wore a t-shirt and pants at home, but the t-shirts started to show her midriff and the pants became very short.

The last straw was when I noticed that three of Colin’s shirts were missing. These were expensive designer shirts, so it wasn’t possible they were simply misplaced. I couldn’t find them until one Sunday, when I walked past Gema’s room while she was out. She had forgotten to close the door. Through the gap I saw something familiar hanging from the ceiling fan — it was one of Colin’s shirts! I found the other two folded up under her bed.

To this day I still have no idea what she intended to do with the shirts. Perhaps she had a crush on Colin, or just liked the feel of the material. Some friends of mine suggested black magic, but that idea really creeps me out.

When I told Colin about the shirt incident, he agreed that Gema had to go. Colin had also overheard that Gema often told random strangers that Brian was her son, while we were out in public.

Gema’s reaction was rather dramatic. She cried and said that she felt at home with us. I got really scared when she went to the upstairs window and threatened to jump. After 15 minutes of trying to coax her away from the window, she really jumped. Luckily we live on the fifth floor and she landed on the roof of the walkway below the window.

We had to make a police report after that, since the commotion had attracted the attention of the neighbours, who had called the police. I remember the officer on duty being rather pissed off with Gema, because she tried to get his sympathy but he wasn’t convinced. I overheard him say to his colleague, “Another maid trying to act crazy to go home!”

After all the drama my family had to go through, I would tell other people just to be very careful when hiring a maid. I suppose it is like a lottery, but please check with the agency if you feel in the slightest bit uneasy.

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Filipino Employer's view on maid (yaya). 
This is what my filipino colleagues felt too. 
Keep a distance from FDWs, never treat them like sister or close friend.

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A Singaporean women Jaslyn claims her maid stole items such as undergarments, toiletries and cash from her and her family. The employer also found notebooks containing erotic diary entries and cuttings of sexy women hidden by the maid. 

In Lian He Wanbao it elaborates:
"Our maid was caught hiding our items in her cabinet which included undergarments, new baby's clothes with hair on them, 4 notebooks containing erotic diary entries and clippings showing sexy women from magazines and newspapers, a Swiss Army knife, make-up accessories and toiletries.

"Cash amounting to $700 of different currencies was also recovered on her during the search conducted by the maid agency staff. 
"However, we were advised that the onus falls on us to prove that the cash belongs to us. But how to prove? 

"The maid, when exposed in front of the agency staff, was still arrogant and walked away thinking that we cannot do anything to convict her! 
"We can tolerate anything but not when the safety of our baby is compromised. She was also found covering our then 1 month old baby with her sarong from head to toe in the middle of the night. 
"We want justice to be done instead of having the maid agency to keep this matter under wraps and transfer this maid to another potential victim! "We have also made a police report." 

Editor's Note:
Many households hire maids to help here and there, but stories like these go to show that sometimes you simply can't trust a stranger. Of course not all domestic workers are like this and there are many who are reliable and can be trusted.Perhaps a better screening process should be put in place to ensure maids are of good character, or assurance that those found stealing are removed from the agency and disallowed from finding maid work again. 
Another thing that perhaps employers can do to reduce the chances of such events occuring is to foster a good working environment. It is less likely for maids to steal if the employing family is kind and friendly toward to maid, as there would be a greater sense of guilt to do wrong to a family who is caring. 

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Philanthropy is a laudable virtue but should one do blindly?
Have you read all that I have plucked here and there regarding what maids did?  Did the truth frightened you and stopped you from hiring a 'cheap FDW'?
Or you felt those can't be real.  Maids surely not that bad.

Maids/FDWs are well protected to work in Spore.  Many people eager to shower maids with protection, care and abundant love.  Lots of people claimed employers have over exaggerated ... advocate maids' name shouldn't be publicised, FDWs deserve plenty of chances to err and Employers cannot jeopardise their chances to get a juicy job or be re-employed to give their new employers new cycle of sufferings! 

Why maid unhappy to work here but glued her feet to this little red dot?  No one forced you to work here as a multi-tasking maid. If you don’t like your job and entitlement here, just go back to where you came from. You were the ones itchy backside, willing to offer maid agency money about S$2000 to fly to Spore for a position known as Foreign Dometic Worker (FDW).   We didn't force you to take up such a lowly job.  There is a long queue behind you, which include candidates who really need a decent job to feed their impoverished families back home.  Give up this hot seat to somebody who needs a job more than you.  You are unwelcomed to enjoy life at our expenses.  Don't make us hire a princess and serve her like she's a guest in our house.

Any maid who claimed she worked 16 to 20 hours a day, 7 days a week (no off day) and forbidden to eat with the employer's family .... I must ask, are you insane?  Didn't you receive MOM's newsletter mailed to your employer's house that teaches you what are your rights?  If you claimed didn't receive any newsletter, don't you know how to view MOM website or read the free newspaper?  Didn't your agency or countryman teach you how to scheme and get lesser work?  Don't you hold a mobile phone or able to communicate with others ... you have so many helplines or people waiting to save you but you chose not to use?  If you're really such a hardworking, poorly treated but remain well behaved person ... wow, you're a rare species.  Unbelievable to know Sg princess attitude FDWs can stand such a harsh life, didn't complain to MOM or runaway.  Your employer must have treated you well in some ways that kept you contented, hesitated and glued to their house. Why you want to stay with a lousy employer and at the same time complain to others you have overworked ... your complaints are not justifiable.

I came across a Facebook page created by a FDW.  She has all sorts of unhappiness eg she worked long hours, tasked to cook feasts because she claimed her employer felt she could cook very well .... but she remained glued to Spore .... 8 years (not the same employer), isn't this contradicting?  This net savvy FDW chose to work in that bad household and has time to post her unhappiness as well as others online (in her employer's premises).  She has a husband who was a journalist, holding a degree and currently working in Spore constuction office (air-con).  Can somebody enlightened me by explaining why FDW complains she is not working for a good employer, made her slog for 12-18 hours, yet choose to remain there?  If she really worked long hours, where did she find time to go online bad mouthing employers ie posting on Facebook, her blog, etc?  She worked 8 years in Spore!  If she felt she is very good or can shine better elsewhere, why force herself to work in a lousy employer's house?  She has off days to meet her husband who has been the one to proof-read her stories.  Her husband is so highly educated yet didn't try to find his wife a better job.  Is it because as live-in FDW, she gets free lodging, food, insurance .... all sorts of good bargains?  She can visit maid agencies, compare and find her desired employer so what's holding her? 

Don't understand what she is thinking.

Her husband (above picture) claimed male employers and others touched her.  If this FDW dressed appropriately, no revealing outfit, no hot pants (picture below), would men mistaken her intention/signal? 无心挑逗?刻意引人犯罪?

This FDW is so discontented yet 死赖着不走, makes sense?  On one hand claimed too lowly paid, 'revival' of slavery, only received S$500/month and needed to work very hard eg clean a huge house single-handedly ....blah blah but her action showed S$500 is a reasonable salary for a person with her educational level, she can't get this amount nor the live-in benefits if she goes back to Philipines, did I hit the nail? Who gave her the authority to feel ashame on her employer's behalf?  She should use description like cheap skate or stingy employer.

There are good and bad employers, nobody is perfect, not all humans are alike. Likewise there are also good and bad maids.  I have no chance to hire a really good maid, somebody trained by me to ease my load/stress and willingly become my abled helper for at least 2 years.  I have no chance to see a real FDW who has been chained and lost her freedom to leave a bad employer.  New maids are so clever, unhappy or not keen to work well, they ask for a transfer or simply runaway!  As an 'old bird', this 8 years FB maid is able to access internet, looked so 精明how come she just 'sit there and complain'?  She has '2 brains' (including her highly educated husband) her plight is really unbelievable.  If activists want to pity this FB maid blindly or somebody similiar to her, go ahead, nobody stopping you from playing the role of saviour.... anyway, we can't stop your urge to knock us down, you're not the only person adamant to make employers' life miserable.

If you wonder why Employers didn't use proper channel to complain, why set up a blog, spare some time, read my blog and you'll know why. This blog was created when I employed an Indonesian maid.  Blogging is good, I have a proper outlet to vent and warn others ... avoid myself from bottling everything and end up kixiao.  Blogging is better than screaming or lecturing my Indo maid who made it looked like chicken and duck relation.  This blog serves as my diary too! 

When you nag, reminded your FDW too often or shouted at her once awhile, there may be undesireable consequences.  She can be somebody who has extremely high ego and pride thus, I may put my girl at greater risk of being abused.... even though maid was purposely doing the wrong things.  Some maids do not want to be reprimanded for repeated mistakes/negligent, thought too highly about themselves or had the wrong definition of 'being treated like human'.  Over pampered, too demanding and unrealistic!

I am not capable of being a gracious person by forcing a smile on my face, so fake, pretend I'm not upset, annoyed by what my FDWs did and what MOM/activists has inflicted (click, see what MOM replied to me) on me are no big deal.  Think on the bright side ...  sad to say, the bright side is not beyond my reach!

If what my FDWs did to me are bestowed upon you, can you still be sympathetic and gracious?

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Domestic helper accused of theft and hurting boy
inSing.com - 12 July 2012

She picked up the teenager – a 15-year-old boy – and allegedly dropped him to the ground from a height of almost a metre. He ended up fracturing his right arm and left knee.

No, it was not a wrestling show gone wrong. The incident allegedly happened when a domestic helper was home with her employer’s son in a HDB flat at Tampines Street 82.
The woman, a 27-year-old from Indonesia who goes by the name Juwarni, was charged in court yesterday (11 July) for causing grievous hurt, The Straits Times reported.

She was also charged with stealing $1,530 in cash from her employer between April 2011 and July 2012.

A neighbour interviewed by Shin Min Daily News, known only as Madam Jiang, said she had observed that the domestic helper had a tendency to stare into space and be in her own thoughts. However, she said that Juwarni was polite and would smile at the neighbours.

Madam Jiang added that the victim’s parents had once told her that the helper was not doing a good job and they were intending to replace her.

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现代女佣多数在家乡饭来张口,如同千金小姐般养大,有自己的主见,如何能训练并且成为好帮手?难 难!
当女佣太好命,变成自以为是,‘无法无天’恶言相向 是你的问题,因为你纵容她!睁一眼闭一眼 息事宁人 不一定是好事。

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They confronted their maid after they found money and jewellery stashed away in different places in the flat.  But Leni Maya Sari, an Indonesian, remained defiant despite being found out.  The 24-year-old claimed she had burned the money which she had stolen from the family.

Why? To destroy the evidence, said her employer, Madam Cindy Lim.  She even led her employers to the pile of ashes outside their flat.  The police were called to the flat and when asked why she did that, Leni replied in broken English: "I think of burn, I burn lor."

She was arrested and charged with one count of theft.  Last Monday, Leni pleaded guilty and was jailed four weeks.  Madam Lim told The New Paper that Leni was "not a good maid" but they gave her a chance, hoping that she would improve.

Leni came to Singapore last December. She started work at Madam Lim's Woodlands flat in March, after she was transferred from another household.  Madam Lim, 48, a beautician, said in Mandarin: "Just two months into her job, my younger son found money missing from his locked drawer, which was forced open.

"Not long later, my elder son also lost some money."  The two boys, aged 18 and 14, lost about $600 in all.

Madam Lim added that Leni admitted to stealing the money when confronted and she then apologised to them.  The couple decided to give her a chance and told her not to do it again.  Said Madam Lim: "We also went to the maid agency and asked the agent to scold Leni."

But instead of being repentant, Leni started stealing again a few months later.  This time, she targeted Madam Lim's mother-in-law, Madam Ng Choo.  Madam Ng, who has difficulty walking, found her money and some jewellery missing in October.  The court heard that Madam Ng lost $150 from her wallet, which she had placed in her drawer.  Some jewellery, including a gold necklace, a gold ring with jade and a pair of diamond earrings amounting to $1,640 had also gone missing.

When Madam Lim confronted Leni, she denied any involvement.  Said Madam Lim: "This time, we decided to send her back to Indonesia.  "We did not want to return her to the agent for her to be transferred to another family because she could steal from them too."  But before they could do so, Madam Lim's mother-in-law was diagnosed with stomach cancer and was warded in hospital.

During that period, Leni spent most of her time at the hospital taking care of the elderly woman.  Madam Lim said that on Nov 25, while Leni was at the hospital, they decided to search their flat.  "We found some cash hidden in the pantry area and inside the washing powder container, which was half-filled," she said.  "My mother-in-law's jewellery was also found stashed beneath a box in the laundry area."

They planned to confront Leni the next day and left her loot untouched. They took pictures of the stash.  The next day, Madam Lim and her husband confronted Leni when she was in the flat.  "We asked her if she had stolen from us. She kept mum so we told her that we knew what she'd done," said Madam Lim.

"My husband asked her to take out her loot. That was when she said she had burned everything."  But the couple did not believe her.  So the maid led them to the rubbish disposal area outside the flat.  "There was a pile of ashes there and she pointed to us saying 'there'," said Madam Lim.  "My husband was incensed and called the police. He also told the maid, 'Our hard-earned money you go and burn?'.

"But she was nonchalant throughout. Even when she was handcuffed and led away, she did not say sorry."  The court heard that Leni had stolen cash in different currencies, amounting to $784, and that she had burned some of it. The jewellery she had stolen was recovered.

It is unclear how much money she burned but Madam Lim said that she later found about $100 which Leni had hidden.  Madam Lim said that Leni was a habitual smoker and could have spent some of the stolen money on cigarettes and pre-paid phone cards.

This article was first published in The New Paper, Dec 2010.

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Maid allegedly killed lover with 5.6 kg 'dumb-bell', October 31, 2011, TNP
The Sri Lankan maid who allegedly killed her lover was sleeping with another two men behind his back.

She was allegedly so besotted by her lover that she went as far as to steal her employer's cheque book twice for him to forge cheques to encash.

But when Mr Murugaiyan Selvam, an Indian national and Singapore permanent resident, asked Sri Lankan maid Tharmalingam Puwaneswary to do so again to use the money for his wedding back home in India, she allegedly snapped.

Puwaneswary is on trial for manslaughter after she was accused of killing Mr Murugaiyan, by striking him twice on the head with an improvised dumb-bell weighing about 5.6kg in December 2009.
She also allegedly stabbed him near his genitals with a sharp object.

One of the two men, Mr Ramasamy Thiyagarajan, testified that he had sex with Puwaneswary about six days after the alleged killing and said he did not notice anything odd.

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A horrible experience with her sister's maid led to the creation of a Facebook group called "Dangerous Maids", which hopes to warn the public that maids are not always the victims and that employers get abused as well.  The creator, Ms Hylda Low, started the group on Tuesday.

"I want to warn the public that this maid is very dangerous. We cannot let this evil person do this type of black magic to anyone anymore," wrote Ms Low.  The 20-year-old student claimed that the maid, who is from West Java, had cooked soup for her family with her menstrual blood which she collected on a cotton pad and secretly put it into a disposable tea bag.

The family found out about the maid's dirty deed early August and to their horror, was told that it was the third time she tainted their food with her discharge.   Ms Low's sister, who declined to be named, said that the family employed the maid to look after her grandmother.

The maid was transferred over from her sister-in-law's employment and worked for the Low family for five months before she was exposed during a Sunday family gathering.  An uncle discovered a piece of soaked cotton wool cut out from a sanitary pad hidden in the kitchen while he went to get a mop to clean the floor.  He started to suspect something and monitored the maid's behaviour. Moments later, he saw her searching for the piece of bloodied cotton at the same place where he had found it.  He then called for a family meeting, during which they found out what the maid had been up to.

"We confronted her and she intially denied, saying that she had cut her finger and used cotton wool to soak the blood up.  "We asked to see the cut and she wasn't able to show us," said Ms Low's sister.  After much probing, the maid confessed to the deed and said that a bomoh had advised her to do this so that her employers would like her more and listen to her.

During her confession, she told Ms Low's family that she was angry with them for not allowing her to chat on the mobile phone.  Ms Low's sister said that they were initially told of her habit of frequently chatting on the phone, but said they did not prohibit her from using the phone when she had finished her chores.

"We allowed her to go to her room after she was done with work. She would usually go to her room around 8.30pm to 9pm and talk on the phone till midnight," said Ms Low's sister.  Awhile later, they realised that the maid's attitude was slowly changing and she started to neglect her work.  The family then imposed a curfew on her phone usage. She was told that she could not talk on the phone until it was after 6.30pm.

"She started throwing tantrums and banged the door all the time. She wanted to pack up and leave, so we called the police to stop her because if she leaves under our employment, we will get into trouble if anything happens.  "We managed to convince her to stay until we find a replacement," said Ms Low's sister.

After the incident came to light, their uncle called the police but was told that they could not press charges due to lack of evidence.  The maid was immediately sent back to Indonesia.

After she was sent back, Ms Low and her family confiscated the maid's phone and found photos of her posing in the house, while she was supposed to be alone at home with their grandmother.  
According to Ms Low's sister, it is not possible that their grandmother had taken the photos and it was obvious that the maid had invited someone else into the house while they were not around.  When asked why Ms Low wanted to set up the 'Dangerous Maids' group, she replied: "Sometimes maids are not the only victims, the employers are also victims.  The group is purely to share experiences. Although they cannot be verified, users can share their experiences with their maids based on their part of being the employer," said Ms Low.


  1. To be frank, if I CAN find another country like Singapore vs FDW’s country-of-orgin, in terms of currency exchange rate, economy prospect, etc., I WOULD PROBABLY BECOME MAID MYSELF! Let PAP MOM and my employers treat me like big baby.... shiok arhhh
    The last time I checked with my FDW, she needs to work hard for about 5-6 years here, saved enough to
    1. Build her family a brand new house (landed property
    2. Bought and breed some cows as investment, selling calves as returns every few years.
    3. Support her brother to finish his (not sure) College/University education.
    I can see she is working hard, and am glad she is working towards her goal. She is currently having one (out going) day off per month, and is not expected to cook on Sundays most of the time (We believe in rest-day too! Hey, we want some breaks too! How she’s managing is to finish most household chores (washing, ironing, etc) on Saturday, and have a good rest (in-house) on stay-in Sundays.
    Occassionally she gets to go holiday in neighbouring country with us, sometimes with small holiday gift from us in appreciation of her hard ywork.
    Well I understand not everyone behaves like us, and don’t expect them to. I’m one lucky employer, so far so good! (finger crossed)

  2. Believe me….it is a “fact”. When my grandma was stricken with parkinsons and my granddad had a stroker we had to cycle thought 6 different maids. And by God you could not leave them alone for a few minutes without blowing your top off. They go out during wee hours of the morning, so much so that my granda realised it and locked her out. Stealing, taking food to share with other maid as though it was fking their’s to give in the first place. Whipping out the cellphone and merrily chatting during working hours. You name it and I’ve seen it so take a hike junior.
    It really grinds my gears when stupid human ‘rights’ activists and hippies so readily point the finger at employers while discounting all the sheer nonsense and frustration they have to put up with. Often times the employers are’nt even around to see the maids’ dalliances which are reported by concerned neighbours.

  3. I have a very stubborn maid. She cleans the floor like 'sayang' the floor. My mil has feedback to me and i have told her before to scrub harder or use more strength (told her nicely). When I remind her , she keep quiet or sometimes argue back that she did use strength. i notice that she nvr change, even if change, its only for a while then she'll revert back and still do the wrong way.

    That is the same with some other similar situation such as pushing n dragging furniture so she can wipe below. I have told her nicely and even scolded her at times but she just wont' change!

    On top of that, she will show her temper to us. Eg we were in a rush to go out as my dh's meeting some customers. i juz asked her to eat faster, she was not happy. whole day showing us her black face and when we reached home at nite, she was literally bang tings. not exactly very loudly but loud enuff to show me she's not happy. Until today, she's still displaying unhappy face. After reading so much, i guess you guys will ask me to send her back? is there any other alternative that won't make me loss money and annual leave?

    1. Bring her back to agent for counselling. Let the agent to handle her.

  4. Recently, i went to a hair salon to get a queue no. for her to trim her hair and also mine. After that I went to fetch her from my mil's place and told her i'm gona bring her to trim her hair ... She refused. She was afraid i'm gona cut her hair short but I explained that its juz a trim and she can still tie up, keep hair tidy and not leave them flying about.

    Instead, she told me if i bring her there she'll juz take a cab back. I was so angry when she said that! Anyway, i feel the agent will not scare her ... maids nowadays very defiant. I counsel her, told her what i dislike about, her attitude and what I've compromised with even though I don't like. Maids have their rights...but they must know they are here to work and shouldn't abuse the privileges given!

  5. I have just fired my maid last night. Have realised her extensive usage of phone till 2am in the morning and everyday she is like a zombie. Told her that we do not like her to use so much even during day time that she neglected her work. Her reaction is something that we could not accept. She retorted :"so what if I use. Like that also cannot? So what you want huh? With hand gestures.
    So we ask her to pack up and called the agent to come bring her.
    I told her I need to check her Handphone to make sure she don't have pictures of family, my kids and the place we stayed as she has Facebook.
    Findings as below:
    1. Lots of act cute pictures
    2. Further scrolling - lots of topless picture of herself in the bathroom, in the kids room during day time. (we have also notice that she frequents the toilet very very often and each time stayed in toilet for more than 30mins. I'm talking about 5 times in a day or more) that explains why she frequent the toilet so often!
    3. Quickly check her SMS confirmed that she has 2 lovers in Singapore and 2 overseas. Which some of the SMS state that the guy is meeting with her on Sundays!

    She has weekly Sunday off, and every time she goes out she wears the full Muslim attire all wrapped up. She gave us the thought that she is a very decent woman as she needs to pray 5 times a day and even point to me which corner of the kids room that she use to pray. However her photos says otherwise. She uses that corner to pose her topless photos. There are more gross photos which I found. She even pose in my master bedroom!

    She's only with me for 4 months and all these craps starting on the 2nd month when she demands to go off days after her interview with the MOM officer whom did not gave the full picture to her and just told her that all maids are entitled to day off on the first month of work in Singapore. (look at the harm done who wanted to step in and yet give half half information to first time maid working in Singapore)

    In addition, she has lied to us since the first day that she was with us. She told us that she did not have a Handphone, however the pictures in her phone shows the past photos that she took when she was working in M'sia which means that she had her phone all along.

    I am now going to resign from my job which is paying relatively well so that I could look after the household and my kids as I could no longer trust maids anymore.

    1. By the way when I ask her if she has swimming costume so can go swimming with kids, she says she's shy to wear swimming costume. Duh....tell me about it with all the topless photo that she took and most likely send it to her lovers.
      Whatever she says are just pack of lies...

  6. I treated my maids well and I'm pissed off by what they did to repay me. Their main responsibility is to look after my kids; make sure they have clean uniform and clothes to wear, prepare their meals. My kids clean their own rooms, wash their own toilets and school shoes. My maids don't have to wash the windows nor my car. They can choose to clean my house only when it's dirty, no need to sweep and mop everyday.

    Every maid I’ve employed finished cooking dinner at 6.30 pm and every evening, they sit down to watch the 7pm Chinese TV drama with my kids until 10pm. No work done during these hours.

    One maid had so much time, she read (my kids and I taught our maids to read and write English) every novel in my library. She added prawns, squids and chicken to her noodles and fried rice while my kids' noodles and fried rice have only chicken and egg. She cooked herself fried Cod fish or Salmon for her lunch whenever my kids couldn't come home for lunch due to CCA. She loved watching TV and singing karaoke.

    Another maid stole my food and cooked it for her fellow maids during their weekly parties. She stole my son's MRT card, my watch, money and food. She wore my clothes, put on my make-up and took pictures of herself in my bedroom with her handphone. She had numerous boyfriends. When my hubby and I were overseas, my kids said her boyfriends or herself would call one another and yakked until midnight. She even secretly went out to meet her friends when I was abroad. She would chat for hours on the phone with other maids in the morning, not doing cleaning for several days.

    Third Sri Lanka maid often made my 5 yr-old son walked a kilometre in the hot noon sun to make phone calls to her boyfriends. She picked him up after his kindergarten class and walked that distance so neighbours wouldn't see her and tell me. My young son was bribed with ice-creams. She has her Sundays off and would scoot off very early before 7 am before I woke up and return at 7pm. She gave my phone number to Bangladeshi workers and I found myself becoming her receptionist when I was on sick leave for 3 days.

    4th maid stole S$3000 from my elderly mother-in-law who had wrapped it in newspapers and hid it behind her mirror for years. She remitted it home, we found the receipt. We didn't send her to the police after she begged us not to.

    The 5th maid was a Christian, after a year of working with us, she requested to attend church on Sunday afternoons. We found a church where Indonesian service was conducted and sent her weekly until she said she could go on her own. She was supposed to come home after church before 6pm so we could have dinner with my in-laws but then each Sunday, her coming home got later and later. She was the one I caught with the foreigner worker. She didn't attend church, she went to have fun at motels with her lover. When I go out for outings to places of interest or dinner with my kids, I brought them along. They get to eat what we ate. Japanese sashimi, sharks fin soup, burgers, steaks...I changed 7 maids... the longest worked 4 years, shortest 9 months.

    Is it too much to ask maids be responsible and look after my kids while I work my ass off to pay bills and her salary?? Can maids behave like paid employee and do work properly?

  7. Almost every employers of domestic workers in Singapore have problems with their maids but they choose to tolerate and keep them. Singaporean employers are the most generous within Asia. You should hear how the maids are treated in Malaysia, Saudi and other countries.

    There are a few black sheep employers but media and activists took the liberty by making it like big news to shame and penalise all employers.

    We are finding alternative ways to solve the maid problem, we hope not to rely on maids in future, you can go work in other countries if they are really better than Spore.

  8. When maids ask for too much, something is bound not to work. Maids should be liable for their own actions. Maids should be treated as regular employee and work according to service contracts. I agree with not providing accommodation, toiletries, transport, insurance and food for them. These people don’t use brain for work related matters, lazy and calculative.

  9. Wrong families being squeezed - regulate maid agencies and FDWs

    MOM - Ministry of Manpower

    Finding a suitable transfer maid

    Maid is a necessity for me

    Domestic maids/FDW off day

    Expatriate's point of view

    Facebook - Net savvy maid

    FDW's employer unrealistic and demanding?

    Live-out option at FDW's cost


This blog is not meant for screw-lose activists or loans. My blog aims to gather all FDWs' news scattered everywhere, become a one-stop site for mentally & financially bullied FDWs' employer to beware and learn. Don't pollute this blog with your pro-maid, insensible and selfish comments! Activists posting here are BLIND IDIOTS, IRRITATING freaks and deliberately showing no RESPECT for others... robbing our only breathing space.